OCR Text |
Show ay All my inner experiences, while giving me peace and hope, did n0t alleviate my l o n e l i n e s s . I contented myself with my baby and my books and my w r i t i n g s , looking forward to the time each day, when Becky would r e t u r n from school. My days were leisurely, yet routine. This much time for yoga, this much time to read the Bible, this much time to play with the baby, and luring her nap, this much time for writing. The baby was probably the drawing card that interrupted my routine one spring morning. I hadn't dressed or finished my newspaper and coffee. Even the-ashtray was f u l l - Brian had been watching television late the night before - and I didn't think to empty it when my mother and Aunt Helga. rapped on the kitchen window and motioned that I should openthe front door. I dumped my coffee and slung into a bathrobe as I raced to the door. I glanced quickly around the livingroom as I turned the lock. No beer cans - thank heaven! p I kissed each Athem before I saw my father lurking behind them on the porch. My stomach f l u t t e r e d and thudded as though my heart "as doing somersaults a l l c^rSrMiiy teak. Did the house s t i l l smell « cigarettes? The place was c l u t t e r e d - baby clothes and boots tossed incomers of the livingroom, d i r t y dishes in the kitchen sink. My "other or Aunt Halga would never be caught in such a mess. They came in and spread out, beyond my control - my mother to pick up the baby, V father to gaze at the pieces of abstract painting I had purchased torn an a r t i s t friend. They would make no sense to him, of course. I ^ed agitatedly, picking up c l u t t e r as we chatted. I finished their ^tences, failed to finish my own. Then Aunt Helga was steering my fa*her into the kitchen to show him my huge, fulsome piggyback plant - sile had seen i t on an e a r l i e r v i s i t . Then I remembered the horrible, |