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Show 51? the old group. Of course, your daddy just wants to hold everyone together. But I suspect the - - oh, I don't know what to call it - the attempts of Brother Reardon to catch up with your father...." "The competitiveness?" "Yes, t h a t ' s i t . The competitiveness i s part of the reason your daddy has taken more wives. Brother Reardon has so many, and some of the men believe your worthiness i s judged by the number of wives the Lord gives you. I think i t ' s a bunch of bunk - not a word of s c r i p t u r e to support that. But Joseph Smith had so many i n his l a t e r l i f e and. . . • Her voice t r a i l e d away as she looked at me. Then she looked at her hands and b i t her l i p as though sorry she had spoken. More wives. More wives. "More than the two widows?" When she nodded, her face seemed out of whack, somehow, a contortion of conflicted feelings. "But Mama, he has more than enough now!" Then I b i t my l i p. Who was I to judge him? I had accepted him as he was, with his beliefs, a f t e r long years of suspecting him. I had t r i ed to see him as an egomaniac, as a as a lecher, as a ram following other mountain sheep. But none of my attempts to explain his expansiveness had f i t except t h i s : He was doing what he believed he must do. It was not an easy l i f e, fraught as i t was with other people's troubles. They s t i ll called him at two o'clock to ask what kind of a s p i r i n or cars they should buy. They s t i l l came to him, confessing gross sins and i r r e s o l v a b l e heartbreaks. Now, in t h i s era of compassion, having f i n a l l y taken his l i f e in my s t r i d e , I could not afford |