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Show US5 »T1 •d idn't mind xthnaatt ' •* zT saa^iid A- ,.IXtJ . was too beautiful. rt<as beautiful, wasn't i t ? " I turned to Brian and he nodded, a bit reluctantly, I thought. He was caught simultaneously in the fact of our sharing and in t h e i r mockery. He d i d n ' t want to be l e f t out of the trio. They were his only friends since Vietnam, and they had drawn him into their inner c i r c l e to the exclusion of a l l others. "Of course you d i d n ' t mind. You probably enjoyed i t ." Danny hooted, knowing he had h i t the bruised part of my conscience. He knew quite a l o t about my past relationships with men. One night, hadn't /• ° to Brian come home, I had gone to he and Dierdre, confessing MJ torment. I hadAtold them about the r a p i s t ; now fee was using all he knew against me. It had to be a kind of rape in i t s e l f , using confidences to undermine a person's dignity, to question one's integrity. I flushed darkly. I had taken a l l their i n s u l t s , had listened to their derisive remarks about every member of my family, had endured their philosophical contradictions and t h e i r assertions that I was crazy , and had swallowed t h e i r disregard for my feelings and opinions, and had s t i l l turned the other cheek, seeking forgiveness after our recent ^ luarrel. But now I had no more cheeks l e f t to turn. Tkey I stood up. "I won't put up with t h i s ! " I burst into tears started from the room. As I strode past Brian, I should have Ielt his long fingers closing around my ankle, but I was blinded with *nger and t e a r s s . Suddenly I was f l a t on the floor, my r i b s aching, ^ breath gone, my face rug-brined. |