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Show trying to fool Grandma. She could tell what I was thinking most of the time, which was not a comfortable situation. I didn't care today though. It was hard talking about Russ. It helped a lot when she kind of knew my feelings. I didn't have to explain much,that way. Ma was planning the funeral alone. Pa wasn't any help with things like that, so ma did it alone. I knew it was hard for her. I even tried to help, but ma had it pretty well organized by the time I said anything about it. She had done a good job too. She hadn't forgot anything. Russ' tutor was giving a short talk and the church's ladies choir was going to sing two songs. The doctor was going to speak about Russ, probably a talk about how brave he had been throughout his life. After all of that, the pastor would naturally give some closing remarks. Russ had been a good church member. He always attended the meetings and never slept through the sermons. The pastor would say some nice things about Russ, I was certain of that. I was relieved that ma hadn't asked Jake to talk. I was glad she hadn't let her emotions where Jake was concerned, rule her head. I was afraid she might. Jake may have loved Russ a lot, but he was no funeral speaker. All he knew was animals, farming, and hill superstitions. He wouldn't know what to say at a funeral. Ma called Georgia later, when we were supposed to be getting ready for bed. I couldn't just go to bed as if everything was normal. Nothing was the same. I couldn't even help ma tuck Russ in, or listen in on his prayers. I listened in on ma's conversation instead. I knew I shouldn't, but the house was so quiet I couldn't help but hear. "He's gone," I heard ma say, "my baby's gone." |
