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Show Moon - 225 I nearly shout, "Yes, and I might be carrying our baby!" But if it isn't so, it would be cruel, so I bite down on the happiness that bubbles inside me like a new river. I say, simply, "Almost. Just one more place. The cottage. My brothers. You have that number, yes?" I brace myself for his anger, for he's been patient beyond all reason, but he laughs and says, "I'm going to celebrate. I'm going to ride Windfall. Maybe I'll take her into the mountains." I'm filled with dread, which quickly changes to anger. Is he saying this to frighten me so I'll hurry back? "Are you crazy?" I say. "I've been afraid of her for too long." This stops me for a moment. Maybe he's right. Maybe it's what he needs to do for himself, for us. But I feel constrained to warn him. "She's a handful. You don't know how to ride. You'll get hurt." "Til be fine, believe me." But I do not believe. I wish I hadn't decided to drive all the way to the cottage. My wish to give everything time to sink in seems indulgent. Now I must slow Josh down. I say, "Wait 'till I get back. I'll teach you how to ride and we'll celebrate together." I'm not sure this is completely honest, but I'll say anything to keep him safe. I see this as if for the first time, and I think it means I might be learning about love. I'm approaching Dayton. The man in the red Lexus has been behind me for the past fifty miles or so. I'm driving uncommonly well, which happens sometimes when I let my eyes go soft and surrender to the surging flow of traffic. I'm |