| OCR Text |
Show Moon -150 "I said yes, Td have the surgery, but then I woke up sobbing like a little kid." He's never had dreams like that, not that he's told me. He's never cried, not that I've seen, nor has he ever spoken with such naked pain. I say soothing things to him, say I miss him, though it isn't true just now. I feel tight years away from him. It's as if I'm caught in a time warp and I won't be able to leave New York until some sort of span has been crossed. It's crazy, but I feel compelled to find another man. Who, exactly? And whatever for? Nothing is clear. I'm into the darkest dark. In New York it's easy to find a man. All you have to do is go someplace public and look a little bit lonely. I do that well. I choose a restaurant where distinguished-looking men come for breakfast, for it serves things like eggs benedict and kiwi fruit. I'm thinking this is just a trial run, for who is looking for a woman at breakfast? But there he is at the table next to mine. Like me, he's eating a Danish and pretending to read his perfectly-folded The New York Times. Yes, I'm embarrassed to say it, but he has gray hair at the temples and the look of men who have too much authority. I say "okay" when he asks if he can join me. What else can I do? I am, as they say, set up. And so is he. He carries an expensive briefcase. His name is John Something. I don't catch his last name, but it doesn't matter. He has a cleft in his chin and nice eyes that are a little tired.- I've never before been with a man who might be the same age as James. I could call for my check, make good another escape. Instead, I accept a coffee refill and ask him things like, "Where are you from? What do you do?" |
