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Show Moon - 219 They leaned toward James as if to challenge him, and Lee said, "We refuse to fight." His father shook his head, looked tired. "So?" The boys leaned back in their chairs, their knuckles over their mouths as if to hide embarrassment or some other feeling. Joy wanted to say, "Mom is dying and all you can do is talk politics." And she wanted to say, "Think of your cousin Tommy, who fights in this war." But it occured to her that something else was at stake here, having nothing to do with politics. Her brothers needed their father to call up his days as a soldier and resist them. They wanted him to get involved with them, to rise and honor their challenge. She felt a sudden great pity for all the males of the world who must engage in these struggles for succession. Caleb sat up straight and said, "We'd rather go to jail than bear arms." He smiled at Lee as if to shore up their alliance. Joy remembered Caleb's worried look in Germany as he ran with the other boys waving sticks and shouting "Kill!" She thought of the bombed-out houses and her mother saying, "My brother Michael wanted to stop Hitler." James shifted his weight in his chair, uncrossed his knees, said to Lee, "Get me another beer, would you?" To Caleb, he said nothing. Lee came back with the beer. He stood in front of his father and cradled the bottle to his chest, as if he would withhold it until he got what he wanted. His face was twisted against a feeling that threatened to surface. With an obvious effort, he smoothed out his features and looked straight into his father's eyes. "We don't want to be like you." |