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Show A promising geologistSURELY.Prof. Beckstrand (discussing the dynamos in the Telluride Power company's plant)-"Mr. Karrick, when the dynamo is running at full speed and is carrying no load, why doesn't it run away?"Karrick-"Because there's a man there to watch it."THE ARTS DO IT ALSO.Prof. Pack (in geology five)-"in the Jurassic period, the reptiles were lords of creation. They swam in the sea, walked on the land and flew in the air. Later the mammals appeared, and they became lords of creation. They swim in the sea, walk on the land ami-ah, what mammals have taken to the air?"Sam Oleson-"Wright Brothers and Madame Paulhan."THE ORDER OF THE BEACON.The University has many clubs, but may well be proud of the one organized on the twenty-third of September, 1909. It would be impossible to state here all that the Club stands for or is attempting to accomplish. It is sufficient to say that the watchword of the organization is, "Hide Not Thy Light Under a Hat."The officers are:President-Blackner.Vice-President-Miss Williams.Treasurer-Knowlton.Executive Board-Nalder, Howells, Car-michael.Pledges-Miss Sheckell, Miss Ivans.Honorary Member-Professor Coray.Note: Miss Barnard was disqualified for excessive use of peroxide.THE LESSON."Let this be a lesson to you," said the professor, as he assigned the rest of the book.-Stanford University Chaparral.(254)Prof. Arnoldson-"Miss Riter, have you a wig for the play?"Miss Riter-"Yes, but I don't know how to wear it."Prof. Arnoldson-"You might wear it like I wear mine."Miss Riter-"No, I'd look like a freak."Ben Howells (in Bingham)-"Say, waitress, could I have some fried oysters?"Waitress-"Sir, this is not a seaport town."Mr. B. (in physics)-"When Roemer noticed that the eclipse started from a certain point-"Dr. Merrill-"Where was Roemer?" Mr. B.-"Why, on the earth, I guess."BAD FOR THE POET.The managing editor was looking over a poem just submitted. It read:"When dusk is changing into dark, I'll meet her in the leafy park." "Don't think the meter is proper," he said. Throw it out."-University of Minnesota Minnehaha.ASK THE 'VARSITY DEBATERSHow Roberts got his name.What Anderson left with the chambermaid in San Francisco.Where Hamren lost his Scribblers' Fob.Why Perry tipped the dining-car waiter a nickel.Why Draper tipped the ----------- tendollars.If Wootton really get his pants cut off.Why Utah lost three debates this year.Harvard yell, according to a Princeton student:"Wah! Wah! Havad!"LARCENY.He stole a kiss, and saidHe didn't know 'twas she. But jealous then and angry quite,She called it "Petit Larceny." He stole her heart, and thenShe gave to him her hand. For don't you know, she shyly said,That kind of larceny is "Grand."-Selected.Our Darling "Bobbie" |