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Show CHRYSALIS PAGE 105 "I really don't know, for sure, what is real and what is necessary for survival. We kid ourselves so often, trying to make a 'meaningful' experience out of everything. It is possible some things have no meaning." Jenny said once, "It's so hard to keep appreciating what you have, day to day. But there are very few things that cannot be overcome by a strong-willed person." Death is one. In the dreamless times between dark and dawn, in the quiet nights of ticking clocks it comes to us, and we can't be indifferent. Indifference is a waste. It is. possible some things have no meaning. But I keep trying to find one. I have decided to write a book. (Hasn't everybody!) I hope it will not require an editor's gentle postscript telling of the valiant (though unsuccessful) battle I waged against the Dark Forces of Fate. I understand what I want to do - I feel it - a rediscovery of sensation after numbness, a sort of re-awakening. I want to evoke my reality with an intensity others will recognize. I feel things I never felt before. People are more beautiful than they were. Breath is sweeter. Colors are brighter. I |
