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Show Acting Alone Page 322 "My feelings exactly," said Simone. "Former punk band. Found Christ. Learned another chord. Entered the ministry. They used to be called Bloody Diarrhoea and the Foot Boogers." One of the Four Friars in F Major, plump, mustachioed, not entirely white, took over the modest refectory organ, shoved the red hymnals aside, and somehow adjusted it to make a highschool combo tremolo. He started playing Doors licks on it - specifically the lick from "Light My Fire," which Sam recognized not so much from the way it sounded as from the soulful face the little moptopped friar made as he failed to play it. Sam remembered that grimace from a hundred prepschool sock hops. Then the whole band, drum kit and all, segued into what Simone yelled into Sam's ear was their hit single, a song featured on those national TV spots from the Franciscans: an upbeat version of "Set Me Like a Seal on Your Heart." Everybody referred to their EEG's to sing along; but no nun voice could be heard over the friars' amplified shrieks and grunts. Simone's whole body jiggled sympathetically to the beat, as it were against her will. She said she wanted to sit perfectly still, like the Professor, and register her disgust by not responding at all. She didn't want to bounce around like the ancient nuns on all sides who were trying to undulate their coifs and wimples and shoulders like beatniks, glancing over at Sam's beard periodically for approval. "Yeah, their music swings about as good as my nuts on a cold day," Sam yelled into Simone's ear. "Are you sure they're real honest-to-God friars?" "Yes. But don't let that prejudice you. They do everything hip except |