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Show 3oo The WIVES EXCUSE: Or, Wild. O defend m e from a Wife. w«. And from a filly Miftrefs, Sir, the greater Bur. then of the two: A Wife you may lay afide, but afoolifh fond Miftrefs will hang about you, like your Confcience, to put you in mind of your Sins, before you are willing to repent of 'em. You k n o w w h o m I mean, Mr. Will \ng, you may truft m e with the Secret, becaufe i kno^ it already . Wild. That's one very good Reafon truly, Madam. Wit. M y Coufin Fanny indeed is very well in her Per, fon--, .. Wild. I'm glad on't. Wit. Very well to be lik'd, I mean. Wild. 1 mean fo too, Madam : Tho' I have known Clap miftaken for a Maiden-head, before now. [Jfl Wit. But file's a Girl, and I can guefs h o w very utifi, a Girl muft be, to give you any defire beyond undoinj her: For I k n o w yout Temper fo well, (now you ha? fatisfy'd the Curiofity or Vanity of your Love) j( would not bear the Punimment of her Company anotl Day, to have the Pksfure of it another 'Night, whatcv ycu have faid to perfwade her to the contrary^ Wild. Fie, Madam, think better ot me. Wit. Better, nor worfe, than 1 do of all the yom M e n in T o w n : For I believe you would now refignh to any body elfe,. with as much fatisfa&ion as youg her for your felf: I k n o w moft of thofe matters end the Benefit of the Publick: And a little of your ill Uli (which you will take care to fupply her withal) r make her one of the c o m m o n Goods of the Town; that's a Ruin I would prevent, if I could:- Therefore, fave you the Labour cf getting rid of her (for that's t only defign you have n o w upon her, I'm fure) I a to ipare your Good-nature the Trouble, by making very fair Offer. Wild. Let's fee h o w reafonablc you can be, in ano Body's Bargain. Wit Very readable you mall find me, it you but give over your farther Attempts upon her, (wfc n o w you roay eafily * ***** t0! f u ^ tfc Cuckolds make Themfelves. 3 ot . ,., by your Affiftance, to m y Defign of marrying her: ileneaee m y felf and Intereft (which you k n o w is Vconfiderabfe in m y o w n Sex) to ferve you in anyo- If W o m a n of m y Acquaintance Wild Faith, Madam, you bid like a Chapman. S T Any W o m a n , of any Family or Condition, the ft Friend I have I'll befriend you in, and thank you in-the Bargain. mid Stav, let m e confider, w h i c h - . tt/But take this Advice along with you } raife the re of your Affairs above the Conqueft ef a Sir). me ot vou Sparks think, if you can but compafs a Jden-heU th<>ugh but ro u r Tailor,s D a u g h t f ^ ' you t fettled a Reputation for ever. Why, Sir, there are iden-heads among the W o m e n of Quality, though tfo many perhaps; but there are Favours ot all kinds be had among 'em j as eafily brought about, and at the e price cf Pains, that you can purchafe a Chamber- Wild I'm glad you tell me io. Wit Why, there's Mrs. New-love and her Coufin Tru- L , Mrs. Artifit Mrs. Dancer, Lady Smirket, Lady 'oudmore-, and twenty more of your Acquaintance and ine, all very fine W o m e n to the E y e - 'VU. And of Reputation to the World. Wit. Why thofe very W o m e n of Reputation to the orld have every one of 'em, to m y certain K n o w - le, an Intrigue upon their Hands, at this very timej I'm intimate with all of'em. Wild. I fee you are. Wit. But as fine as they feem to the Eye, Mr. Wild-fwhat with the falfe Complexions of their Skins', fir. Hair and Eye- brows -, with other defects about'em, hich I muft not difcover of m y Friends, you k n o w* ith their Stinking-breath in the Morning, and other favory Smells all the Day after, they are moft of chem tolerable to any Man that has the Ufe of his Nofe. Wild. That I could not believe indeed, but that you 1 me fo. |
