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Show pg 11 The Big Unknown I decided to take my thesis in a new direction. I decided to explore, and allow myself to be vulnerable to my Unknowns. The Unknown had a duality and dichotomous nature, symbolizing both my fear of the unseen and my relationship to Deity, who I felt would give me better insight to achieve my ideal self as an artist. I decided I would use visual mythmaking to express and achieve this idea. Inspired by my previous research and exploration of masks, I became interested in the idea of tying both masks and illustrations into the work I would produce for my thesis project. I wanted to use the masks as a tool to help me put on the persona of Artist. Despite knowing the new direction of my work, I still struggled to connect the dots so these masks could empower me, until I enrolled in an art history class with Sarah Hollenberg. Using Jackson Pollock as a catalyst to investigate modern and contemporary art, I found a love for mythmaking. It was through the myth of Pollock, and those who used him to propagate their storylines, that I saw a parallel to making my own myth. Art critic Clement Greenberg used Pollock in his writings to represent or signify the culture dominance of the U.S., and the new movement of Abstract Expressionism4 , and some of Greenberg's narratives influenced some of Pollock's later work. Those who followed Carl Jung's concept of analytical psychology used Pollock's art and therapy session drawings as a new tool to understand the unconscious, which also had an influence on Pollock's art process5. These myths, created by the outside observer of Pollock, are how I found that I, too, could create my own narratives for my art and increase the ability to achieve my ideal state as Illustrator, as Artist. I started making masks, props, illustrations, and performances to create my own myths. These myths would ultimately create self-awareness by revealing my art making process to myself, as well as help me overcome some of my fears and false self-perceptions. After making a couple of pieces, I found that little narratives would reveal themselves as I performed within the mask. One narrative was revealed through a mask entitled, Masks That Cover Our Vulnerabilities. The mask made me think of flashy cowboys in Las Vegas who have never had any ranch experience or worked with cows, who only dress up to conceal their true identity as a city slicker at a Garth Brooks concert. When I wore this mask, I felt flashy, and fake. My internal dialog kept telling me that my thesis was not going to work. |
