OCR Text |
Show Appendix H "ALICE'S UNCLE IN BUREAULAND" THE PARODY PRESENTED BY SENATOR DOWNEY IN ATTACK ON MR. STRAUS AND THE BUREAU OF RECLAMATION POLICIES ' 'Good morning, Mr. Straus. I can see that you are deep in a whirlpool of non-reimbursables," said the visitor. Mr. Straus growled without looking up from his figuring. "Somebody around here has to find ways to make infeasibles look more like feasibles." "I might agree, if I were you," said the visitor diplomatically. "A I understand it, you are planning to have the people spend 33 million dollars to recreate on the Central Arizona Project so you can charge the treasury that much." "Well?" glared Mr. Straus. "What's wrong with that?" The visitor swallowed hard. "Let me introduce myself. I am the president of the Association of National Taxpayers the ants, as we are known. Ha ha, the hard workers of the Nation. Just call me Mr. Ant." Mr. Straus sat up straight, a gleam of hope in his eyes. "Ants!" he cried. "Ant control! How much do you suppose we could write off a reclamation project for ant control?" " Probably you could write-off a lot," said Mr. Ant. "If I may say so, you are very efficient at such work." Mr. Straus smiled. "We have a good writing-off staff." "Indeed," said Mr. Ant. "Especially with such things as fish and mountain lions and coyotes. I'm not forgetting recreation. My, but you are good at writing off project costs for recreation. And then there is interest. I expect there is no one in the country better at getting money out of the treasury without interest than you." Mr. Straus waved a hand as if to dismiss the thought. "Oh, we seldom pay any interest for Federal money. We leave that to you people . . . the Ants, isn't it?" Mr. Ant put umbrella and old battered hat on the floor beside his chair and sighed. "These are matters I'd like to discuss |