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Show 20 The R E H E A R S A L ; Johnf. Have a care of what you fay, Mr. Bayes; for Mr. Smith there, I affair you, has written a great many fine things already. Bayes. Has he, i'fackins ? Why then I pray, Sir, how do you do when you write ? Smith. Faith, Sir, for the moft part, I am in pretty good Health. Bayes. Ay, but I mean what do you do when you write ? Smith. I take Pen, Ink, and Paper, and fit down. Bayes. Now I write ftanding, that's one thing: and then another thing is, with what do you prepare yourfelf ? Smith. Prepare myfelf! what the devil does the Fool mean ? Bayes. Why, I'll tell you now what I do. If I am to write familiar things, as Sonnets to Armida, and the like, I make ufe of ftrew'd Prunes only ; but when I have a grand Defign in hand, I ever take Phyfick, and let Elood : for when you would have pure Swiftnefs of Thought, and fiery Flights of Fancy, you muft have a care of the pen-five Part. In fine, you muft purge the Belly. Smith. By my troth, Sir, this is a moft admirable Receipt for Writing. Bayes. Ay, 'tis my Secret; and in good earneft, I think one of the beft I have. Smith. In good faith, Sir, and that may very well be. Bayes. May be, Sir! i'gad I'm fure on't: Experto crede Roberto. But I muft give you this caution by the way, be fure you never take Snuff when you write. Smith. Why fo, Sir ? Bayes. Why, it fpoil'd me once, i'gad, one of the fparkifheft Plays in all England. But a Friend of mine at Grefham-College has promis'd to help me to fome fpirit of grains ; and i'gad that fhall do my Bufinefs. SCENE II. Enter the two Kings hand in hand. Bayes. (~*\ H, thefe are now the two Kings of Brenfcrd; \J take notice of their Style, 'twas never yet upon The R E H E A R S A L; 21 upon the Stage : but if you like it, I could make a fhift perhaps to fhew you a whole Play, writ all juft fo. i King. Did you obferve their Whifpers, Brother Kin?? 2 King. I did, and heard, befides, a grave Bird finer That they intend, Sweet-heart, to play us Pranks. Bayes. This is now familiar, becaufe they are both Perfons of the fame Quality. Smith. S'death, this would make a Man fpew; i King. If that Defign appears, I'll lug them by the Ears, Until I make 'em crack. 2 King. And fo will I, i'fack. i King. You muft begin. Mafoy. 2 King. Sweet Sir, Pardonnez moy. Bayes. Mark that; I make 'em both fpeak Freneh, f mew their Breeding. Johnf. O, 'tis extraordinary fine ! 2 King. Then fpite of Fate, we'll thus combined ftand And, like two Brothers, walk ftill hand in hand! «v . * »•. . . [Exeunt Reges, Johnf This is a majeftick Scene indeed. Bayes. Ay, 'tis a Cruft, a lafting Cruft for your Rogue- Cnticks, i'gad : I would fain fee the proudeft of 'em all but dare to nibble at this; i'gad, if they do, this fhall rub their Gums for 'em. I promife you. It was I, you muft know, that have written a whole Play juft in this very fame btyle ; it was never acted yet. Johnf. How fo ? Bayes I'gad, I can hardly tell you for laughing (ha, 'c^P l 1 5 / 0 . ^ ^ a Story: ha, ha, ha! &[ ' Smith. What ls't ? I^rhafShtT^"' *' POiW-b,ank <cfus'd "* Johnf. Fie, that was rude. *S 'n*' Wh°ie World' rSad: I'gad there's as this ,!?ol<= Ca"-'°ad of things, every whit as good C u'rn'd t r n I VuW W gad' thefe MM** Rafials wve turn d em all back upon my hands again. Johnf. |