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Show 30 HICIJ..\JW HURDIS. prudent man. 1\fy feelings were too impetuous, my pride too ostcntntious, to sufrcr me to hiJe it from cxltiLition. To depart witlwut sccl.-ing and scciub )lary would be a tacit acknowledgment of wcakucss. It would scf'm t hat 1 feared tltc interview; thnt I questioned my own :;trcngth to contf'11d ngninst an influence which all around me sus11Cdcd, but which it was my pride not to acknowlcclgc even to myself. 'l'hc day came preceding that. on wltid1 I was to depart; aud the dinner was scarcely over, when, ordering my horse, I set out to go to Squire Easlcrby's plantation. 'l'hc di!>hmce was .seven miles, a matter of no importance in a country where, from c]Jildhood, the })CO!Jlc arc used equally to fine horses mal long distn,nces. I rode slowly, l10wcver, for I was meditating what I should say, mullww I should demean myself during the inteniew wl1icl1 1 sought. "\Yhile I tlcliLcrated, I discm·ered tlw.t I had ovorta.skecl my strength. I felt thnt I loved too earnestly not to Lc somewhat, if not severely, tried. Could it lwvc been that at tktt late moment I could ltave re-resoh cd, aud, without a depreciation of my sclf-Pstecm, ltave turned b:tck, I feel thnt I should have done so. But my pride would not sufl'er this, and I resolved to leave it to the same pride to sustain nud succor me throughout. rro lose emotions whicl1 I found it impossible to subdue, I increased the speed of my horse. Striking tho rowel into Ids flanks, and giving l.im free rein, I plunged into tl1e solitary yet crowded woods, over a road wltich I had often trodden, and whiclt was now filled at e\·ery step in my progress with staring, obtrusive memories, wltich cl•attcred as I went in sweet and bitter yet familiar tongues. H ow often had I trodden the same region with her, when I ltad no fears, and uone but pleasant images rose up Ucforc my contemplation! 'What harmonics were u•y unspoken, my uu· challenged hopes on those occasions ! "\Vltat. pictures of felicity r ose Uefore the mind on every side ! Not that I then thougltt of love-not that I proposed to myself any plan or purpose which regarded our uniotl. No! it was in the death of my hope that I was first taught to know that. it ltad ever lh·cd. I t was only in the moment that I was taught tl1at I loved in vain, tlmt my boy-ltcart disCO\'ercd that it l1ad ever loved nt all. :Memories were all that I had rescued from tlte wreck of hope, TilE HOSTILE GUAPPLE. 31 and they were suclt as I had Leon most will ing to have lost for ever. I t was but a s:Hl consolation to know how sweet Latl Leon tltosc tltings wltich I had once known, but which I was <loomed to know 110 longrr. Bittrr were t1tc tltoughts wltich attrndcd me ns I rode; yet in tl•oir very Litterness my soul gathered its strength. 'l'he sweets of life enfeeble us. " ·c stntfrglc nmong tltcm ns a grci!dy fly in tho l1oncy wltich clogs its wings, and lCttcrs it for e\'cr. The grief of tl~o heart is sometimes its Lest medicine, nnd tltough it mny not g•ve us L~tck tltc lost, it arms us againSt loss, and blunts the sensibility wltich too frCfJUCntly finds its fate in its own acuteness. From my bitter thougltts I gathered resolution. I remembered tltc intimacy wbiclt l1ad formerly prevailed between us; how we lu1d mutlwlly confided to caclt othH-how I had ?ntirc_ly coniid~d _to ltcr; I tow joint were our sympathies, how 1mp:ltJcnt om· _Jest res to be togetlter; how clem·ly she must }1avc sect~ tl1e. feelings which I 11ever spoke; l10w cle:uly had like fcclmgs m her been exltib itcd (so I now tl1ought) to me: nnd, as I dwelt on tlJcsc memories, I iuly resolved that site lt:ul tr i~ 100 with me .. She ktd won me Uy Iter mts, till my secret was l H her .l~Osscsston,, an~l thou, either unmoved l•crsclf, or willi11g to sacnf1ce Iter aflectwns to a Laser worsl1ip, she lwd gi,·en l1ersclf to another wl•om she could not love, Lnt whose wcaltl1 ktd bc.CI~ too ~rcat a temptation to ber woman-eyes for 11er feeble spmt to wtthstand. . 'l'ltat she was engngetl to my Lrot!Jer, I never doubted for an m~tnn t. It was as liUle the suLjcct of doubt among the whole netghLorhoocl. Indeed it was the conviction of the neigltborhood, and th~ ohl women thereof wlticlt p1·oduccd mine; and then, the ~vtdence seemed utterly conclusive. J ohn llunlis Bjlokc of llbry Ensterby, as if tlte rigltt were in him to speak for l10r; and shc-.slte ne,·er denied tho imputation. It is true I h:1d never qucst10ued Iter on tltc subject, nor indeed, do I know tltat she _lwd e~cr ~con qucstiouctl Ly others; but wltere was t_hc neccsstty to mqutrc when there wns seemingly 80 little occas10n for doubt 1 The neighborhood believed, nucl it was 110 h~nl mutter for one, _so jealous and suspicious as myself, to Joap Wlth even more read mess to a like conclnsio11• And yet, riding along that road, a1l my memories spoke |