| OCR Text |
Show THE ANNUAL BLEAT Page 335 INTERNATIONAL MATCH GOES TO MARVIN JONAS Strokes Way To Victory Over Double-Ugly Gowans in Great Match In the first international ping-pong matches that were held at Kelley field last Sunday, Brute Jonas, erstwhile champion of Bryn Mawr and Vassar stroked his way to victory over his tool, I mean teammate, Ugly Duckling Gowans. The Brute was always in command of the situation having the upper hand throughout the entire contest. The match started out slowly with Gowans showing very little interest in the proceedings, but as time went on, he took the situation in hand and showed great footwork in the backcourt. The trouble was, he ran around too much and didn't hit the ball enough. Jonas showed the old primeval instinct and slapped Gowans over the head with his bat several times. Gowans was lucky that it was his head, however, and he received no injury. This boy Gowans can sure take 'em there. It looks as though the "Brute" is the cream of the ping-pong players even if he does look like a lot of sour milk to me, and next week sees him facing "Wild Joe" Basone in this ever popular ping-pong tournament. Children Cry For Hickman Axe Handles m m mmmi These Axe Handles are made of the sturdiest wood and are guaranteed to last for at least five (5) axe murders. These handles will fit nicely into any make of axe head and will not work loose. ; •V'.v* ;i«i|liilf:ifi; Don't accept any inferior make-See that the Hickman Irand Label is on the axe handle that you buy. Distributed By The Hickman Murder Tool Corporation ZITHER CONTEST GOES TO PRETTY LITTLE MISS Winner Displays Great Skill and Endurance To Triumph PRINCESS APPLE BOTTOM A great and colorful crowd saw the Annual Bleat's marathon zither contest won by Princess Ethereal Applebottom, champion zither player of West Siam and the Khy-ber Pass district. The princess displayed great suppleness of body and fingers as well as worlds of speed and fortitude. After a few weeks of playing there could be no doubt in any spectators mind as to the ultimtae result. She was finally stopped after nine weeks of continual playing because two of the judges had lost their minds and the other was already a college professor. In playing for nine weeks, Princess Apple-bottom sets a new world's record for zither playing. The old record of seven weeks was held by Primo Camera since 1911. WHAT DO YOU DO WITH YOUR SPARE TIME? Do You Spend All Your Spare Time Sissy-Kissing? Snap Out of It! Be a Man! -??- Ross Budge makes lie a week just by saving gum coupons. YOU CAN DO IT TOO! jjj Just send for our Free Booklet and Catalogue, jjj Don't send much money! But please send a little. -??- ROSS BUDGE Don't Wait a Minute! You can be as successful as Ross Budge if you act quickly. Address All Envelopes to the U. R. HOOKT COMPANY (Never mind the return address) |
