OCR Text |
Show magic, at the very moment I turned my gaze across the street, the last light in the Kaup's house, the bedroom lamp I suppose, went dark. I could have been the only person alive in the world. Turning back towards my house, I thought to call the Kaup's in hopes they could reassure me that all was well. /An adult would know what to do. When I reached the door, however, I realized that I had locked myself out. Cold and scared, palm leaves rattling like skeletons, I did what I could, broke a window, and unlocked the door. That I still believed my parents might return is evidenced by the fact that I left a note saying I could explain about the window. Unable to remain in the living room where the lights reflected their absence, I returned to the darkness of my bedroom and sheets still warm from my body. By the time my parents came back from their walk, I was hysterical. For the next several years, my parents could not leave me alone-not even to go across the street and play cards-without the hysteria returning. I would beg them not to go, throwing myself on the floor, literally grabbing their legs. When they insisted on seeing their friends, I would call over to the Kaup's several times a night asking to speak to my mom or dad. Hearing my mom on the phone-the metallic click of her earring against the ear piece, laughter in the background mingling with the shuffle of cards-was almost enough to calm me. And these calls were tolerated for a while. Soon, though, Mrs. Kaup began refusing to bring my parents to the phone, would tell me they weren't there, that they had gone to Waikiki, that I needed to go back to bed. On these nights I would sit in my bed and look out my window into the backyard, the plumeria tree moving like a monster, the lights from across the valley very far away, and will them to return to me. 127 |