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Show 19-2 When I asked him, Andrew lifted his head and frowned at me for a moment. "Dinner? At your house?" I nodded. He was upset, didn't want to come. "I would love that more than anything. Really." "You're not upset?" "Why would I be? I haven't been in someone's house since I left for the army. I may not know how to act. Sit on the dog or something." "Oh, Andrew. I was worried that you wouldn't want to come." "No, I want to, very much. Thank your mom for me. She's a nice lady." I was beginning to think that I would never come to know what to expect from the grown-ups around me. Mother was constantly surprising me, doing just the thing I was sure she would never do. And Andrew too. He accepted so easily what I thought he would be afraid of. Just as he talked about my mother being a beautiful woman. The only people who never surprised me were my grandfather and Father. They remained steady and sure, the same whatever happened. But then Grandfather had gotten so sick and had seemed to change although I knew why. And Father had bought a motorcycle. Dreams were easier to manage. I could make most things happen the way I wished without confusion. Was I any different? Hadn't I done some unexpected things this summer? Like making friends with Andrew? And disobeying my mother when I went out to see him? Perhaps unexpected things kept people happy and alive. Not like Grandmother who was shutting out anything new and living only for what had already passed. I lay in bed at night thinking as I listened to the night music from Mother's piano and from the street below, the solitary car passing, the cicadas, a dog barking, the breeze, my father's voice over the telephone. Finally, so that I could sleep, I set aside the tumbling thoughts of the people around me and set sail on a waking dream, hoping it would carry me into sleep. And it always did. |
