Short Oral history with Abdikadir Eftin; 2023-09-16 [Transcript and Audio]

Eftin came from Kenya to Utah as a refugee in 2003 and went to the NGC as a child. He also participated in Colors of Success and attended Jackson Elementary School. Karina Villalba Lugo was a mentor and friend to Eftin and his family. He talks about basketball, being with friends, eating food, and learning how to tie a tie at the NGC. He shared some of the financial difficulties his parents and family faced. Eftin played Junior Jazz basketball. Eftin also shares how his life has changed for the better because of the Karina and the NGC. He shares his admiration for the founder, Nettie Gregory, and her influence on his life. Eftin's friend, Randy, also went to the NGC and he talks about his death.

Eftin_Abdikadir Transcript Thu, Oct 12, 2023 12:33PM • 15:27 This recording took place on September 16, 2023 outside the Nettie Gregory Center in Salt Lake City. It was transcribed and edited by Utah Historical Society Women’s History initiative intern, Carly Bagley, while using Otter.ai, an auto-generative transcription service. We used the Utah Historical Society Transcription Style Guide to create this transcription. The Utah Historical Society conducted this interview for a Scan and Share Event in conjunction with the Peoples of Utah Revisited Initiative. Several members of the community came to this event at the Nettie Gregory Center on September 16, 2023. This interview was conducted outside and behind the Nettie Gregory Center. Because the Center is located near a freeway overpass and next to an apartment building, audio may pick up background noise. The apartment building land used to be owned by the Center. Behind the Center, there is a basketball court and a Colors of Success van. SUMMARY KEYWORDS nettie, karina, gregory, grew, years, center, laughs, basketball, kids, indiscernible, randy, life, parents, today, good, elementary school, abdi, place, beautiful, small SPEAKERS Abdikadir Eftin, Carly Bagley Carly Bagley 00:00 All right. My name is Carly Bagley. I'm with the Utah State Historical Society. We are here at the Nettie Gregory Center. Do you want to state your name? Abdikadir Eftin 00:16 Yeah. My name is Abdikadir Eftin. Carly Bagley 00:18 Perfect. And today is September 16, 2023. Do you want to tell me, you know, first of all, where are you from? Are you from this area? Abdikadir Eftin 00:29 Yeah, I mean, I was originally from Kenya. I was born in Kenya. But I came to America in 2003. I came straight to Utah as a refugee. And I believe that was almost 21 years now. But I grew up in, you know, Rose Park. More in particular, like the Jackson Elementary School area. And I lived here for about almost 15 years of my life. Transcribed by https://otter.ai 1 Carly Bagley 00:51 Amazing. And can you tell me about your connection to the Nettie Gregory Center? Abdikadir Eftin 00:57 Yeah. When I was going to school at Jackson Elementary School, I had a mentor, who also became a lifelong friend. Her name is Karina [Lugo-Villalba]. Yeah. So you know, one day she's like, "You know what, do you want to go skiing?" I'm like, "I've never really been skiing, but sure. Let's go for two weeks." Like, you know, and from there on the bond had blossomed. Abdikadir Eftin 01:15 And so like, once in a while, you know, we would go to the Nettie Gregory Center and it became like a frequent thing. And it would just be these events that's right here, you know, it's 15 kids, all of us. And it was 15 kids that all looked different. And then they all got along. We all became really good friends. And we would come to the Nettie Gregory Center to play basketball together. And this place that [we] came [to] back here, it gets me very emotional to see how much of it has changed. And some of it is also the same too. And also to see how much of my life has changed and how much I've grown, you know? So it has a lot of good memories in this place. It's definitely where I've grown. And I've grown to become a better person because of this place. So, it's a very emotional day for me to come back here. I didn't think I was going to get this emotional, but I'm glad to be here. Carly Bagley 02:00 Yeah. We're glad to have you too. So how old were you when you started coming here? Abdikadir Eftin 02:06 I would say I was about like nine years old? Carly Bagley 02:10 Uh huh. Okay, so pretty young, hey? Abdikadir Eftin 02:12 Yeah, pretty young. Yeah. Carly Bagley 02:12 And that was in 2004, you said? Abdikadir Eftin 02:14 It was like 2005? Carly Bagley 02:16 [2005]? Abdikadir Eftin 02:17 Yeah, I'm 27 now so you know, time has definitely passed. Transcribed by https://otter.ai 2 Carly Bagley 02:20 {laughs} Abdikadir Eftin 02:21 Yeah. Carly Bagley 02:23 So did you know Tre [Bordeaux]? Because you're about the same age. Abdikadir Eftin 02:27 No, I don't know Tre. At least right now. Carly Bagley 02:29 Okay, no it's fine. That's kind of besides the point. {laughs} So, um, that's great. So tell me about, you know, some of the memories you've had here. You know, you said a lot of it's kind of come back to you. Abdikadir Eftin 02:42 Yeah. Carly Bagley 02:42 We'd love to hear stories about what your experiences were like here. Abdikadir Eftin 02:47 Yeah. In the backyard right here in the back, they had a basketball court set up, a full court. And you could adjust the size a little bit. So as kids, you know, we loved to play basketball here. Once in a while, wherever we got the chance to. But also, like, the unique friendships that you built, you know. And again, especially everyone that came to the Nettie Gregory and we were all struggling in our homes, you know. We all came from single parent households. Our parents, you know, trying to make ends meet. Trying to pay the utility bill or having past due balances. But when we came to the Nettie Gregory Center, all that we just forgot. You know, we just came here to just be kids. Because in our houses, we can't. We were too... Our parents were stressed about paying the bills. That stress came on us kids, too, you know? And as a kid, that's just so hard to live a life like that. And so to come to this place with our friends and just play, just be kids, play basketball, and be competitive and... Abdikadir Eftin 03:37 And also they had a huge food pantry as well. So we would eat a lot of food here and go home with our tummies filled up, you know. And a lot of canned food that we could microwave or like candy that we could eat. This place, man, Karina definitely changed our life bringing us here. And we were part of a program called Colors of Success from when we all came to the Nettie Gregory Center. So I remember very vividly playing basketball with some friends here, and getting in heated conversations [about] basketball or watching football. Abdikadir Eftin 04:10 Transcribed by https://otter.ai 3 And like, this is also the place where I got to learn how to tie my very first tie. And like, just tying that tie changed my life so much. Because I was like, "You know what, I want to be seen as somebody who's well put together." Who's very classy, you know. And that's helped me [in] my trajectory of life. Because I went off to college. I went on to get a master's degree. I went on to... I work as a policy analyst now, you know. And I think all this is because of the small little things that this place has done for me has come a very long way and now coming back here again today, I see all that stuff. I'm like, "Wow, this all makes sense now. You know, those little things." I'm just gonna say, "Abdi, do this and learn about your history and all this stuff." It all becomes very valuable to me. It's just so beautiful to reflect and see all this stuff. It's amazing. Carly Bagley 05:02 That is amazing. Abdikadir Eftin 05:04 Yeah. Carly Bagley 05:04 I love that. Man, you said so much and I was gonna ask you something and I got lost in your story. {laughs} So tell me, you know, okay... Yeah, this is what I wanted to ask you. Were your family involved also here at the Center? Did they come here as well? Abdikadir Eftin 05:25 My family had a lot of trust in Karina, our mentor. She was like "You know what, if the kids are with Miss Karina, they're in good hands." And so they would trust Miss Karina. Karina would come to our house and hang out with my family and grandparents to eat dinner at our house, in our house. And but my parents knew if it was Karina, we were either at the Nettie Gregory Center or playing basketball at the Junior Jazz basketball, you know. And so that was like [a] level of trust that is built, you know. Having that person like Karina be an advocate, but also, for her to gain a trust from our parents who come from a very strict community, where you don't let your kids be with somebody else, you know? But they’re like, "You know what, we trust Karina because our kids are going to be in good hands." Abdikadir Eftin 06:04 So when we came here, again, this was our outlet. And so, our parents were very aware that we were spending time here together with all my siblings. When I came today, to this place, Karina had a photo of my two siblings, my two little younger brothers. And like, they were playing Junior Jazz with the jerseys on. And I'm like, "Oh, my gosh. This is so beautiful." Like, they're all grown up now. You know, they're in their 20s. And this was when they were like six or seven, you know? And I sent it to them and they're like, "Please keep that photo. Please bring it to us." Because they were just like, "Wow, we've grown so much." They were all like.... they had chubby cheeks and like... Carly Bagley 06:42 {laughs} Abdikadir Eftin 06:42 Transcribed by https://otter.ai 4 ...and it was so cool to see that. {laughs} Oh my gosh. Yeah, beautiful, beautiful memories in this place. And one other thing I want to share is a few years ago, one of our closest friends, Randy, who also came to the Center with us, he passed. When I was in Washington, DC. I got a phone call in the middle of the night, "Hey, Randy passed away." And [the] first thing was remembering, "Oh my gosh, Randy." We met at the Nettie Gregory Center, you know? From here to the Boys and Girls Club and all this stuff. I have a photo of us and Randy at the Nettie Gregory Center, all of his cousins, all of us hugging each other. And I'm like, "This is the place that we were raised in." This is our world {indiscernible}. It was just kind of cool. Abdikadir Eftin 07:24 So, I came today and I went inside the Center. And then I saw the same couch we were all sitting in. It's all still there. You know, the same place where we took that same photo. And so it is like, some places bring you peace? And coming back today I'm like, "Man, this is peace." I needed to come back and see the inside of it. In a way, it was good for me. Like, a way to breathe, you know? I've been going through this pain of losing Randy for the last five [or] six years, you know? So to come back today and see, I was smiling for the first time. Like, "Man, this is where we met Randy and all of our cool brothers." You know? Carly Bagley 07:24 Yeah. Abdikadir Eftin 07:35 And so, yeah, this place, man. I hope they really bring this place back. Because, it's gonna help so many kids. And just to see the trajectory of the kids, in like, five [or] six years where they're gonna be. Because this place is like a safe haven for them. And it definitely was for me. So, yeah. Carly Bagley 08:24 Yeah, we've heard that a lot. A lot of people have said that it's a safe place where people felt like if they could drop off their kids here, they knew that they were okay. Abdikadir Eftin 08:34 Yeah. Yeah, I live a totally different life than I grew up on. And I'm definitely thankful for the Nettie, but also Karina as well. Because, there's a lot of troubles going on in your household, you know, this... And just a lot of stress of [when] your parents didn't stop working, paycheck to paycheck, just trying to pay the bills. And we live in a house where it's two bedrooms with seven kids, you know? Carly Bagley 08:34 Wow. Abdikadir Eftin 08:34 Obviously with all of that, we all become really close friends and become friends with our families. But it's a hard life to live. And so you need an outlet for that, just to get away from that and just to be a kid. And this place did that for all of us. I called my wife [and] I was like, “Hey babe, I’m at the place that I Transcribed by https://otter.ai 5 grew up. I wish you had came with me today. Hopefully we can come back in the future so I can show you this place I grew up in. You know, the place that really changed my life for the better." Carly Bagley 09:26 Yeah. Abdikadir Eftin 09:26 Yeah. Carly Bagley 09:27 I love that. Abdikadir Eftin 09:28 Yeah. Carly Bagley 09:28 I mean, you already kind of touched on this. But you know, why is the Nettie Gregory Center important to you, personally? Abdikadir Eftin 09:37 You know as I got older, things like a month ago when Miss Karina was getting recognized. She got like a mural of her face at the gardens, in the Rose Park gardens. Carly Bagley 09:49 Yeah, yeah. Abdikadir Eftin 09:49 So like the mural came and I also saw a banner for Nettie Gregory and I got to read about Nettie Gregory. I got to read of her history. You know, who she was. Carly Bagley 10:00 Yeah. Abdikadir Eftin 10:00 I was like, "Wow, this is beautiful. This is the lady that changed my life. This is the lady that worked her whole life to build the Center, and a Center that raised so many beautiful kids, who are doing so many good things." And I'm like, "Man, Miss Karina [if there is] anything that I can do to help with the Nettie, please let me know." And so, she’s like, "Okay, there's an event happening, sometime in September. "I'd love for you to come and share your story about the Nettie Gregory." And so everything's come back to full circle. I recently got married and I want to one day bring my kids to this place. And I hope this place does stay intact. I can say, "Hey, this is where your dad grew up." You know? Carly Bagley 10:41 Yeah. Transcribed by https://otter.ai 6 Abdikadir Eftin 10:41 "This is the place where he was raised. And this is the place that definitely changed his life." Because my kids are gonna have a better life and a better life growing up than I ever had, you know? Carly Bagley 10:49 Yeah. Abdikadir Eftin 10:49 And to see all my brothers, like everything that they've gone through. I don't know, man, it's... Life is very beautiful, you know? Carly Bagley 10:58 Yeah. Abdikadir Eftin 10:58 Like to see like, how... when I was young, I’d see my mom struggling to make the bills and all that was just very hard, you know? Carly Bagley 11:06 Yeah. Abdikadir Eftin 11:07 So like, just to come back here. And just like, "Wow, I've grown so much over the years." And I saw my elementary school, my high school librarian. And I haven't seen her in 19 years. And she asked me, "Abdi, how are you? What are you doing? How's life? And I'm like, "I just got married, I'm doing good. I work in Salt Lake." And she was so proud of me. You know, these are the people that you grew up with, you know? Carly Bagley 11:35 Yeah. Abdikadir Eftin 11:36 And for them to see... People that, this is the village that raised you. And it's always been like [a] My Brother's Keeper mentality. You know, we take care of each other. And whenever one of our friends dies, we pick up, we honor the person [the way] we can, and we never forget their legacy. And we move on with life, and we never forget who they are. And so this is just... It's a really, really beautiful place to come to. So I'm just so, so grateful. Carly Bagley 12:08 Yeah. Abdikadir Eftin 12:08 Yeah. Transcribed by https://otter.ai 7 Carly Bagley 12:09 I'm grateful that you came, too! {laughs} Is there anything else that you want to share? Like any last thoughts? Or even, just memories? Anything that comes to mind? Abdikadir Eftin 12:21 Uh. {laughs} Carly Bagley 12:23 I can tell that you're a wealth of knowledge, that you have a lot to share. Abdikadir Eftin 12:28 Yeah. Carly Bagley 12:28 Sorry, I wish I had another tissue. Abdikadir Eftin 12:30 No, no, it's good. Carly Bagley 12:32 {laughs} Abdikadir Eftin 12:35 I do want to share when the Colors of Success was started up, it would have been with Miss Karina and Jackson Elementary School. She was like, "I'm starting this program, Colors of Success. And I hope you guys all benefit from this program. We don't have a lot of money, but we'll be sure to get you guys out there and seeing different things." But [what] she's been able to do for me (Miss Karina is [who] I'm talking about), she's been able to take me to different environments, you know? Somebody who grew up in Rose Park and just knowing that, she was like, "You know what, there's so much more to things in this world that I want you to see. I want you to have big dreams. I'll even pay for your Junior Jazz. I'll even pay for you to go to these little smaller conferences." And all these things. Abdikadir Eftin 13:20 These are things that my parents couldn't do for me, because they had to pay the bills. They couldn't afford to do that. And so for me to just have that outlet (even just to go hiking at Cottonwood Canyon), those small little things were so, so meaningful. I look back and I'm like, "Wow." I feel as a kid, hiking, they’re like, "Oh, this is boring." But now I have a love for the outdoors. I have a love for trying new things. I have a love for learning. And it's because of being taken from the environment that I'm in and she's like, "You know what, you’re just like everybody else, that you have so much potential." Having that belief in me. And a lot of people say, "Yeah, I want to mentor a kid." But obviously, you're not gonna see that pay dividends now. You're gonna see it later on, you know? And me and her have been friends for almost 20 plus years. And when I went to college, she's like, "You know what, I'll come with Transcribed by https://otter.ai 8 you to college, and get you shelves in your dorm room." And I went to law school for a little bit. And she was like, "You know what, I'll take care of you there." Abdikadir Eftin 14:28 I got married this year and she was at my wedding. And she was like my family at my wedding, representing my family. And just to see that beautiful thing and all my friends that were at the Nettie Gregory coming to my wedding to celebrate me. I'm like, "Wow, this is so amazing." So this place has built lifelong friends for me. And I've come around Salt Lake all the time and I drive by and I'm like, "This is the place that changed my life." I never thought I would say that, but this is the [place] that changed my life. The smallest of having a snack to eat. You know, the food bank would deliver food to us. [We'd] play basketball here. Yeah, this, man. It's good to be back here. Carly Bagley 15:14 Yeah. Abdikadir Eftin 15:15 So good to be back here. Carly Bagley 15:16 It's good to have you. Is there anything else you want to share? Abdikadir Eftin 15:18 No, thank you for having me. Carly Bagley 15:20 Thank you so much. You had a lot of wonderful things to share. I'm going to end the recording right now. Transcribed by https://otter.ai 9