Network, August 1983

The Network magazine (1978-1989) published through the Phoenix Center was a women's magazine created by Mary Gaber, Jinnah Kelson, and Lynne Van Dam who saw the need for an intelligent magazine that would address women's issues and appeal to women in Utah, whether they were in the business world or not.

2 NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 THE ERA? NO! ABORTION? NO! BUT .. . Network 349 South 600 East Salt Lake City, Utah 84102 Karen Shepherd certainly made an excellent point in her editorial about me in the June issue of Network: We all like to have our symbolic enemies. We like to have someone in a black hat, around whose defeat we can rally our troops. For a long time, feminists have looked upon me as their enemy, the prehistoric senator who abrogates their rights and subjects them to the kitchen in the cave. I might join Karen Shepherd in this confessional by admitting I had my former misconceptions too; the women's movement, for example, was obviously led by militant, shrill, unreasonable, ultra-liberals trying to put my wife and daughters at the front line behind a bazooka. Needless to say, I am delighted that we have succeeded in breaking down the stereotypes that prevented us from working together to solve the problems we mutually agree exist in our society. American industry currently requires highly skilled workers in order to enhance economic recovery and to regain a leadership position internationally. Clearly, this demand cannot be met effectively if we ignore the potential contribution of women. This belief has led me to support opportunities for women in education, through the Education for Economic Security Act, and in job training programs offered by the Job Training Partnership Act, Job Corps, and displaced homemaker programs. The JTPA emphasizes the needs of women by emphasizing AFDC recipients as eligible participants, but I am also working with the Department of Labor to ensure fair enrollment and vocational opportunities for young women in the Job Corps and to encourage special pilot and demonstration programs for displaced homemakers. In addition to these education, job training, and displaced homemaker issues, there are several other large and small testaments to our cooperative efforts. These include legislation creating a new program at the National Science Foundation to promote women in science through scholarships, research grants, career workshops, and other special projects. Senator Kennedy and I sponsored this measure in 1980. I have continued to support funding for this program. I have also consistently supported the "Women, Infants and Children" (WIC) program to provide low-income women with the proper food and food supplements so necessary to new mothers, particularly those who choose· to breast-feed their babies. I cast a key vote in 1978 in favor of a bill overturning the Supreme Court's ruling in the General Electric case. The bill mandated that pregnancy must be treated the same as any other illness or injury for the purpose of employer-sponsored health care or disability benefits. I support legislation giving homemakers the right to have their own Individuals Retirement Accounts. "I fought for "flexitime" during the 95th Congress and I fought for its renewal last year. I cosponsored legislation calling for parity between men's and women's track and field events at the Olympic Games; and for several years, together with Rep. Barbara Mikulski, I have sponsored an annual resolution calling for "Women's History Week", which has been signed into law by President Reagan. During the 1981 Reconciliation process, I promoted a compromise amendment which saved and funded the rape crisis centers in the Preventive Health block grant by providing these centers with $3 million. During the same Reconciliation conference, I proposed the compromise maintaining the Women's Educational Equity Act programs, which had been scheduled for abolition. The first hearings I held as the new chairman of the Labor and Human Resources Committee in 1981 were on sex discrimination in the workplace. Using this national forum, women presented their views on pay equity, sexual harassment and affirmative action. I have also held oversight hearings on the EEOC and the Office of Federal Contract Compliance Programs. I want to express my appreciation to Karen Shepherd for her editorial. Dispelling my image as unreachable and unhelpful may do as much as anything to increase our ability to work together. I will keep my door open to women and their concerns. We will not agree all of the time, but I promise a thoughtful discussion and an honest effort to help when we can agree. So, now that we have confessed our former prejudices, I am glad that we can get on with our mutual efforts at better communications and better understanding of the issues. Orrin C. Hatch GETTING HOOKED Dear Network Only a few months ago I had never heard of your magazine. I agreed to the free temporary subscription fairly certain that that would be all I was interested in. After all, I told myself, I have more than enough periodicals to read now. By the third month I found myself reading Network before I got around to Ms. and Parents. By the fouth month I was making time to read Network-that's saying a lot corning from a woman that works full-time, is a mom to a fiveyear-old and a six-month-old, and still considers herself a newlywed. Quite frankly, I'm impressed. Your arti'cles, your format, your layout-all are very well done. My husband is a journalist, and I've heard similar comments about your magazine from several of his co-workers. (By the way, congrats on your awards from Sigma Delta Chi!) Yes, I will subscribe. Just keep doing what you're doing and I'll subscribe every year. Also·, thank you for the fine article on P.M.S.-it was very enlightening and answered many questions. I took it to work and it is still answering questions my colleagues had. Sincerely, Charley Trentleman Ogden FEATURES Skip Branch 6 ABRA V ANEL Mary Gaber 10 TAKING STOCK IN NETWORK: 12 New Owners Point Network Toward The Future Kristen Rogers 12 THE DEVIL'S MUSIC Fiction Maggie St. Clair 15 ELIZABETH DOLE: CLIMBING INTO THE CABINET Jerry Stanger 20 1976 COLUMNS Elouise Bell 5 ONLY WHEN I LAUGH If This ls Tuesday It Must Be Ground Hog's Day Brenda Robinson Hancock 8 ONTHEJOB "May I Help You, Attila?" Dodi Williams 1 7 FINANCE Credit Cards: Blasting Back At The Plastic Fantastic Bank Busters DEPARTMENTS 2 Karen Shepherd 3 LETTERS EDITORIAL The New Math: Paying For Education READING COVER TO COVER Marshall Ralph Dear EditorI've been doing some hammock reading of the last two issues of Network, and I wanted you to know how much I've enjoyed Elouise Bell's article about "pockets," Sherwin Davidson's "Mothers and Friends," Wendy Foster-Leigh's approach to "business travel," and Paula McQuown's review of HiH Street Blues. As she indicates, Hill Street Blues is an "amazing blend of valor and vulgarity." Keep up the good work. 4 NEWS AND NOTES 14 WOMEN IN BUSINESS 16 CALENDAR 22 NEW LANDINGS ON THE COVER By Daniel Price/ Alliance Abravanel by Barbara Richards Beth N. Richins Salt Lake City FAMILY CONNECTIONS A quarterly Network Supplement LIFE IS A GIFT Dear Editor, Abortion is a subject that many people shun, merely because they feel it is an end of a life. Ironically, it is a love of life that makes me write in favor of abortion. If asked to define life, I would say it is the joy of being loved, and loving in return, it is the giving; and in giving, it is of your best soul and being at a time when you are most capable of doing so. Life is many things, including a right to be secure and free. It is a world full of choices and the freedom to make those choices. Did God no.t say, in the Bible, that mankind was to be above all other animals? That mankind was to have the power to reason, and therefore the freedom of choice? It is a great priviledge that women have, to give the most precious gift of all, life itself. But this is an awesome responsibility. A responsibility that drains a woman of much emotional and physical strength. When looking at the world, today, there are countless situations in which the gift of life c'ould be a selfish or cruel gift. That is not what life is all about. As an individual brought into the world and into a very moral and secure family, I take this responsibility very seriously. After much soulsearching, I find that I love children too much to succumb to any selfish desires I might have, to hold my child in my arms. Whether it be my age, finanical position or marital status that swayed this decision, I feel the best thing I can do at this point in my life is to not give birth to a child. A child has a right to security, freedom and a full and loving family. If for some reason, these aren't possible, the decision whether or not to bring that baby into the world, falls on the woman who would be responsible for the outcome. No matter what that decision is, it is not an easy one, • In my situation, l feel that l have made the most unselfish and generous choice possible. Celeste Paquette Salt Lake City l. Jo Ann freed 2. Esther R. Landa 3. Anita Gander 4. Terrell Dougan 5. Mary Gaber 6. Vincent Shepherd 7. Tina Martin 8. Kay Berger 9. Judy Reagan 10. Eunice Shatz 1 l. Lynne Van Dam 12. Norman Tanner 13. Maggie Wilde 14. Barbara Tanner 15. Helen Robinson 16. Karen Shepherd Not pictured: Genevieve Atwood, Lee Brennan, Cris Coffe_y , Jinnah Kelson. NETWORK is written for the women who live and work in Utah and for the men who work with them. In providing its readers with information about the changing world of work, its goal is to promote a dialogue which spawns new ideas, ideas which help people find professional and personal satisfaction. NETWORK's stories are about the Utah community, its business, its beauty, its resources, its unique cultural mix of customs and ideas, its people and their work. FAMILY CONNECTIONS is a quarterly Network supplement which offers resources and information to working parents. PUBLISHER Network Publications EDITOR Karen Shepherd CONTRIBUTING EDITORS Elouise Bell, Brenda Hancock, Wendy Foster-Leigh, Eloise McQuown, Marshal Ralph, Jeanne Shaw, Dodie Williams EDITORIAL BOARD Marj Bradley, Skip Branch, Deni Christian, Betty Fife, Brenda Hancock, Marshall Ralph, Karen Shepherd, Lynne Van Dam ART DIRECTOR Deni Christian LAYOUT/ ARTIST Michelle Fey DIRECTOR OF ADVERTISING Nancy Mitchell ADVERTISING REPRESENTATIVE Gail Gutsche CIRCULATION Marshall Ralph, Jeanne Shaw INDEX Jeanne Shaw-Coordinator FAMILY CONNECTIONS Patty Kimball.Joelle Spitzer-Co-Editors Lynne Tempest, Pat Sheya, Volunteers NETWORK welcome manuscripts (including poetry and fiction), art, photographs and cartoons but assumes no responsibility for those that are unsolicited. They will not be returned unless accompanied by a stamped, self-addressed envelope. All manuscripts will be treated as assigning all publication rights for copyright purposes and as subject to unrestricted right to edit and to comment editorially. Send all correspondence to 349 South 600 East, Salt Lake City. Utah 84102. [phone]. The publication is independent. Views expressed herein arc those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect those of the management. Copyright "' 1983 by Network Publications, all rights reserved. Reproduction without ' permission is prohibitc..-d. NETWORK is a r<-~istercd trademark of Network Publications anJ is published monthly. Subscription price $9.00 per year. NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 3 The New Math: Paying for Education S ince I have been critical of the public school system over the years, I was surprised that I felt intensely annoyed when the President's Task Force on Education announced that the public school system is failing. The news itself wasn't surprising. The report merely confirmed what Time, News·week, and my own good sense had already told me. However, the interpretation that teachers are primarily responsible for this malaise made me mad. President Reagan's repeated insistencethat teachers should do more for less money-~akes me even madder. I know the teachers he's talking about. , They have taught my children. These teachers range from bad to average to brilliant, as do employees in any organization. The good teachers have profoundly influenced our children, and their effect far overshadows the impression left by the others. In all cases, our children have done better when we parents have been involved with the school and the educational process. In addition to being a parent, I have been a high school teacher-at East High, in 1963. That was back in what people call the good old days, when East was one of th~ best schools in the state and students got a good education. Even that long ago I had, as a 10th grade English teacher, 280 students. What that means in concrete terms is that beyond preparing for each class, I had 280 compositions per week to read. That's 560 every two weeks; 1120 each month. In those days,.I believed that students had to write to learn to write. So for a month, I assigned a theme a week. On top of the work load, I had to cope with classes filled - as they would be to an even greater extent now-with children from varying educational, cultural and racial backgrounds. Every hour was an adventure in group psychology, and it took incredible skill to manage it all. I soon stopped assigning a theme a week because the only time I could correct those papers was late at night, every night. And I needed sleep. The stress and work combined until the overload forced a compromise with which I never became comfortable. I assigned fewer papers and I spot,corrected them instead of reading every one. The kids quickly learned to play the averages. The quality of their work slipped. I did not think, nor did anyone suggest, that I could use parents as readers. Marjorie Coombs, an excellent English, teacher at Salt Lake City's Bryant Intermediate School, asked me to be a reader two years ago; where was this example when I needed it b~ck in 1963? Then, we teachers had no support and no help. I quit, vowing never to teach in the public school system again. My annual salary of $3,700 simply was not enough to make the sacrifice worthwhile. Way back in the sixties most women didn't quit teaching even when the stress was too great and the support and pay too little. Most of them were married. Teaching was a second job that let them stay at home summers, and it fit ~ith society's notion of what wo~king women should be doing. No more. Now, many teaching women bring home their families' only paycheck. Certainly many more job opportunities are open to them, and most jobs pay better than teaching. The, school system is no longer supported by dedicated, talented women who are willing to accept low status and pay simply because teaching children is their role in life. Men have never done it in great numbers, and now: women won't do it either. This change has left a gaping void. No matter how often President Reagan says teachers should give more for less, it's not going to happen. . As far as I can tell, Reagan and half the world labor under the familar illusion that teachers should be happy, and satisified and even grateful for whatever they are paid. Why? Because they are molding the citizens of tomorrow, shaping the future by educating the nation's young. You know that myth well; it's the same one that applies to mothers. They too are supposed to be uninterruptedly happy in their unpaid work-no matter how tedious it is or how isolated they are-simply because they are raising the world's most.precious resource: children. Children are said to be of value to us, but we tend to pay homage with our words only. No one is willing to pull out a checkbook. We expect teachers to be brillfant, dedicated, long,suffering. We do not expect to have to pay for their talent, to fork,over even when the consequences are obvious and-terrible. Moreover, we feel betrayed when teachers ask for more money and smaller classes, just as some people do when mothers go to work outside the home. The teacher and the homemaker have much in commoll;. They are both doing women's work, and when they don't do it well, and when they complain, people get mad. In Utah where we have more children per capita than in any state in the union, this stereotype is the strongest-and the teacher's pay among the lowest, the teacher,pupil ratio among the highest. Yes, we have been able to slip by and get relatively good education for our children for very little mo'ney. But the people who were subsidizing the system have other choices now, and, as a result, the economics of education have changed. If we value our children's education, we blame her for moving, and I wonder how will have to pay for it just as we pay for the teachers in that school surivive. I also freeways, for flood repair, for oil. The wonder whether it has occurred to Reagan teachers must change too. The history and Bell that they are talking of excellence teacher next to me when I was at East High in education for a few-the white, middle, School should not have been able to get class, well,adjusted students-not for away with showing movies every day. All everyone. teachers will have to allow themselves to be Since Congress has consistently and evaluated and paid at the level of their skill. emphatically supported and funded these They must be held to standards that satisfy previously listed programs, the Reagan the public. The salaries and improved administration has had to work in covert conditions, especially the lowering of the ways to impose its agenda on the student,teacher ratio, will have to be Department of Education. First, there will initiated at the same time .that the standards be fewer people to do the work and a are raised, however. Otherwise there will different system for allocating the money, be nothing to lure good people into the so that the programs will have their budgets profession. cut lower than Congress provided. Second, •Unfortunately, our leaders don't see according to the Women's Equity Action this issu~ the same way I do. When they League, there are plans to rewrite the job speak of excellence in education, they are descriptions so that the expertise needed excluding hundreds of thousands of for specific programs will no longer be students. President Reagan and our own required. That's the same logic that schools T.H. Bell say that ·parents should demand use when they have the gym teacher also better teachers. At the same time, these take some of the math classes. Since the officals are planning organizational changes long,range goal of the Reagan which undermine the quality of education administration is to do away with the for the nation's disadvantaged students and Department of Education entirely, these for students with special educational needs. actions are predictable. However, I believe Fifty staff members are beiµg cut from the that elitist education will diminish the ' programs that serve these students: the • quality of life for everyone. We must not Women's Educational Equity Act program; .let that happen. the Title IV Civil Rights Act progtam, the What can be done? Write Senators Garn Migrant Education programs, the Indian and Hatch and Representative Marriott Education programs, the Compensatory asking them to use their power to stop Education programs, and the Education for these changes. And after you write those All Handicapped Children Act program. letters, get involved in the community These officials are cutting important service council of the school your children attend. staff at a time when the needs of those When school starts, support and keep groups are greater than ever, when the im, contact with your children's teachers. pact of the disadvantaged upon the classroom Making teachers the scapegoat for a failure is one of the chief reasons teachers can't do of the public school system is not a their best. A friend of mine recently solution to the system's problems. The illustrated this point by moving with her children are a mutually shared family from Los Angeles to Salt Lake responsibility; our willingness to build a because most of the children in the school system that accomodates the needs of all her children attended did not speak the children will heighten the-quality of all English. South East Asians, migrating our lives more than any other single factor. Mexicans, other immigrants had completely changed the classroom chemistry. Her children were ignored because the needs of these special students were so great. I don't OME Alo Coming Next Month: WHO RUNS UTAH: A Look at the Corporate Boards of Utah's most Powerful Corporations. Yes, I want /YetW(>rlt (Subscription price, $7.) Name _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __ Address _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __ City/State/Zip-----------------Telephone (Daytime) _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __ D Bill me D P'ayment enclosed Send to: rtetwork/349 South 600 f.ast/Salt lake City. Utah 84102 I RADIO AND JULIET ADMINIS, TRATORS STICK TOGETHER WITH RED TAPE MY SWAMI OONETOLD ME Don't touch that dial! National Public Radio and Salt Lake's own KUER (FM 90) will ,s oon air a 4-program Jazz Alive series celebrating "women in jazz." lt'll take place on four consecutive Sundays, starting August 14, and will launch out into the ether at 6:00 p.m. The first program will bring us Ella Fitzgerald, Marion McPartland, Sheila Jordan and Ernestine Anderson. On the 21st, the program will feature Nancy Wilson, Shirley Scott, and Tania Maria. Program 3 {_August 28) will spotlight Flora Purim, Lorez Alexandria, and the quintet Alive, The final program {September 4) winds up with Sylvia Syms, Carmen McRae, Chris Connor and Carrie Smith. Doubters or persons desiring more information may call 581-6625. The University of Utah's Center for Public Affairs and • Administration is working on a project-the "Women-toWomen Networking Project" -along with the Utah Chapter of the American Society for Public Administration (ASPA). The aim of the project is to bring women in lower-level government jobs together with women in administrative positions, so that pariticipants can begin networking for advancement and occupational development. The project will involve group meetings, a survey of women in advanced government jobs, and a one-day seminar. Those interested in participating should contact the Center for Public Affairs: 581-6491 or 581-6781. On August 16, at 7:00 p.m., the Salt Lake City Public Library will host a free public lecture on the T ranscedental Meditation program by Barry Charles, M.D. The lecture will be held in the Library's main auditorium. Dr. Charles ascribes many health benefits to the practice of TM, including relief of stress, reversal of the aging process, and development of "creative intelligence." In regard to the last of these, Dr. Charles notes that "TM enables the mind to settle down and to become calm and maximally alert-a process of 'falling awake."' Perfect for working on News and Notes, I'd say. Heck, let's give it a tryZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzz SLUDGE LODE PUTS ROSE PARK ON MAP Feeling a little provincial? Well, the Citizen's Clearinghouse for Hazardous Wastes, lnc. has named the Rose Park Sludge Pit as one of the "418 most dangerous hazardous waste dumps in the nation." This information was published in the July 1983 issue of Utah Neighborhoods, a publication of the Association of Utah Neighborhood Councils. For information on UN or the Association, write PO Box 16616, Salt Lake City, UT 84116. SEE YOU AT THE FAIR? On August 13, the Department of Labor's Women's Bureau is sponsoring a one-day Career Fair in Grand Junction, Colorado. The aim is to bring Colorado women and Utah women together with employers and educational providers. Regional Women's Bureau administrator Lynn Brown says that the main objective is to "help women identify their employment potential and improve job-finding skills." Brown emphasizes that the job fair can benefit many women: laid-off workers, young women just out of high school, displaced homemakers, women going through career changes, and older women. The fair will be held at Mesa College, and will run from 8:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. There is no charge for participants. For more information, contact Coordinator Connie Maslow: PO Box 27363, Denver, CO 80227, (303) 837Al38. HOW TASTEFUL! To celebrate the near completion of the new Salt Lake Sheraton hotel, the hotel threw a construction update bash in a nearby building with a view of the goings-on at the construction site. The Sheraton's newsletter, The Sheratonaire, put it this way: "Corporate Executives received an invitation to a 'Foreman's Fiesta' and their secretaries were entertained the following evening at a 'Senorita Survey'." NOTES FROM A SURVIVOR An incest survivor who's been in a support group is interested in starting a survivor's support group with others also interested. This is not a therapy group, but a group where women can meet others who've had similar experiences. Talking about one's experiences isn't required, but the organizer notes that "talking about it breaks the silence that perpetuates it." Those interested should call 250-9028 during the day and leave a name ( real or phony) and phone number. Sandy will call you back. Or call after 8:00 p.m. on Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday. ROLL'EM, NOW! Salt Lake NOW's summer film festival continues! The next showing is on August 10, and the movie is uYou've Come a Long Way, Maybe?", a documentary about comparable worth. lt'll happen at the Unitarian Church, at 7:30 p.m.; admission, $2.50. A short chapter meeting will precede the movie. For information, <;all 583-5098.' POMP AND SAGEBRUSH Earth First, the outlaw-conservation alliance, is holding an Earth First Festival on August 14, provisionally set for the state fairgrounds. There'll probably be enough macho vibes to warp the ozone layer overhead. But on the other hand, Connie and the Rhythm Method are scheduled for a musical appearance. Tickets are $6 in advance, and $9 after August 1. For info, call 355-2154. • ~ PUSH THE START BUTTON Utah lssues has developed an employment project for nonworking AFDC mothers. This self-sufficiency project works with AFDC recipients to help them develop skills and motivation to move past barriers into self-sufficient employment. According to the July issue of Directions, the Utah Issues newsletter, forty participants have completed the project: 10 have found jobs, 12 are in training programs, and 2 are working on WEAT projects. Recruitment for volunteer group leaders and group participants is on-going: for information, call Debbie at Utah Issues, 521-2035. • SALE FILE CABINETS S69 FULL SUSPENSION CONGRATU"" LATIONS, I'M SURE A recent press release from the U.S. Department of Labor notes that 1983 marks the 50th anniversary of the founding of the U.S. Employment Service, created by the Wagner-Peyser Act of 1933. Now, before you get carried away in the spirit of the occasion, remember the General Accounting Office's report in September 17, 1980, "Employment Service Needs to Emphasize Equal Opportunity in Job Referrals." It noted that "The U.S. Employment Service generally has referred minority and women applicants to low-paying jobs traditionally filled by minorities and women. Whites and males have been referred to better paying jobs." This means 50 years of reinforcement of traditional job patterns. s99 NETWORK,AUGUST 1983 5 ~If This Is T~esday, It Must Be Ground Hog's Day I of your status. My own sign would read, ' Elouise Bell is CLOSED." On the other hand, I know a couple of people who are clearly Saturday night (besides Travolta). These are the women who wear false eyelashes, four-inch dangling ear-rings, and see-through hostess skirts to change the Kitty Litter in the cat's box. They look more dressed up going to bed at night -than I did when I went to Maxim's in Paris, borrowed fur and all. What's really interesting to watch is the encounter of a Monday morning with a Saturday night when their desks are next to each other in the office. Very different from Saturday night is Saturday morning. We all know a few Saturday mornings, don't we? Instead of sleeping-in like other mental-health conscious folk, these people are up with the sun, showered and shampooed and decked out in clean, crisp clothes that announce the morning's basic training: • tennis or hiking, cross-country skiing, or a brisk fifte~n-mile. jog. And that's on Monday . You can imagine how unbearable these types are when it actually is Saturday. Then there's Sunday morning and Sunday afternoon. If you think they're twins, think again. Sunday morning is heels and panty-hose, a dress, and a dash of "A Mighty Fortress" perfume. Sunday afternoon (late Sunday afternoon) is, quite simply, incipient Monday morning. And of course we know that some t happened at my local Skaggs. I was prowling the aisles searching for some industrial-strength Porcelana, when I overheard two well-groomed women talking by the cosmetics counter. "Well," said one, "I used to think I was an autumn, but then I found out that I was really spring." "Isn't that funny?" replied the other. "I've always been a summer." Of course I knew what they were talking about. I may be out of the swim of things as far as high fashion and new-tech make-up are concerned, but I still paddle around the edges of the pool, and the ripples reach us all. These two shoppers were referring to a theory of clothes and make-up co-ordination that assigns each person a "seasonal" designation, depending, I assume, on one's basic skin tones, hair and eye color, and for all I know, blood type and urine analysis. If you are an "autumn," you ~upposedly look best in certain shades and textures, if a "spring" you look better in others, and so forth. Now my own purpose of wardrobe selection has nothing in common with matching up Nature's seasons and my own. My categories are not winter, summer, autumn, spring·, but passable, shabby, disgraceful, and don't-insult:-D.l.-bymaking-the-offer. But I certainly don't pass judgment on those higher up on the gracious-living ladder than I simply because approach to dress and grooming. The zealots I hear preaching the Four Seasons Doctrine carry on as if these designations were ordained in heaven, as if they were part of one's karma. The implication is that if you're an autumn and you mistakenly or, perish the thought, willfully deck yourself out in the hues of a spring, you are subverting some master plan laid before the foundations of the world, and nothing will possibly go right in your life until you repent and get on the predestined course. I mean, we have pressures enough in life, without a new Eve-God theory breathing down our necks and checking the colors of our undergarments. On the other hand, if there is anything at all to this concept, why stop with the .four seasons? I mean, let's extend the metaphor and use what's available. For instance, I haven't the foggiest idea whether, according to the Eve-God theory, I'm an autumn, winter, spring, or summer. (And please, don't tell me; I couldn't handle the responsibility of knowing.) But I do realize that frequently I am Monday morning. Certainly my clothes tell me I'm Monday morning, but it doesn't end there. My face tells me, my body tells me, my mind, whatever segment of it responds to roll call, tells me in no uncertain terms. Now an enterprising entrepreneur might be on to a good thing if she put out a package of cosmetics and related sundries labeled, "Monday Morning." Nothing elaborate: a their standards are more esoteric than sturdy tube of Erase for the dark circles, a women are Mother's Day all year around. mine. What l do question is the assumption that seems to accompany this packet of aspirin, high potency mouthwash, and a small sign warning the outside world They wear big, self-advertising corsages at all times and the fact that the corsages are WE KNOW YOU'D RATHER FIGHT THAN SWITCH· CREDIT UNIONS~ But we want to make it easy and profitable ·for you to switch. Call us, and let us come and see you. BEEHIVE STATE EMPLOYEES' CREDIT UNION 1467 South Main Street · Salt Lake City, Utah 84115 (801 )484-8811 8:00 AM to 6:00 PM Mon-Fri HEBER WELLS BUILDING 160 East 300 South 10 am-2 pm Monday and Wednesday DIVISION OF TRANSPORTATION 2700 West 4 700 South 8 am -4 pm Tuesday-Thursday and Payday OGDEN DIVISION OF FAMILY SERVICES Friday, 9 :00-11 :00 AM SOCIAL SERVICES OFFICE North Temple and 2nd West 10:00 to 11 :30 AM Tues-Thurs TRAINING SCHOOL Wednesday , 1 :30 to 3:30 PM STATE HOSPITAL Wednesday . 9 30 AM to 12 00 Noon STATE CAPITOL OFFICE Room B-23 State Office Building 10:00 to 2:00 Monday· 2:00 to 4: 00 Friday Statewide Toll-Free WATS Line 1-800-662-7189 invisible doesn't keep anyone from seeing them. I had an aunt once who was clearly Ground Hog's Day. She came out of her burrow periodically, but invariably saw a shadow of some sort {it obviously didn't matter whose) and went right back into seclusion again. I have a friend in Logan who is the Fourth of July-well, most of the time, anyway. In fact, her whole huge family is filled with Fourths ofJuly, except, I believe, for ope of the younger boys, who apparently is Recess. I needn't tell you about the people who are April 15. We all have a touch of that in us. I understand there's a new blusher out called "Livid" that would suit the April 15ers to a 1040. Phyllis Diller used to be a Hallowe'en, but apparently she tired of that and changed her chemistry or something. And then there are my niece and nephews: Hilary, Chris and David-each of them an undisputable Christmas, at least to these biased old eyes. The next time someone asks you what you are, forget the Taurus or the autumn: tell them you're Friday afternoon and raring to go! Elouise Bell is an English professor at Brigham Young University and a humorist. WHATMR MOVES YOU ... ... 6 NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 Maurice Abravanel offered what Utah needed most, the capability to build a bridge between two cultures with fine music. by Skip Branch "Totally male. There was ne~er a single woman," says Maestro Maurice Abravanel. 0 • 1 insisted on auditioning ladies and kicked out several men. It was quite a scandal in Sydney." Referring to his days with the symphony orchestra in Sydney, Australia, in 1935, Abravanel touts himself as a feminist "before it was fashionable . And when I came to Utah in 1947," he says, "I did the same thing. I was one conductor who had more women in the orchestra, in the whole country, or anywhere." Abravanel is in his "dressing gown", as he calls it, sitting in the dim light of his basement study. He's relaxed and thinking deep into his past. "When we went on our European tour in 1966, I was told by some women here in Salt Lake to 'hide your girls ... it's not professional.' I thought ... why? After all, with interesting looking ladies, if people are bored by the music, they can always look at the ladies and enjoy." That represents much of Maurice Abravanel's style. He seems to enter a subject from one side, with serious drive and commitment, yet leave it from the other side with a quip. The effect? "It's disarming," says Lloyd Bliss, long time member of the Utah Symphony board. ''Maurice is a very knowledgeable fellow about human nature and often puts things in a very unique way." In the case of women he was ahead of his time. Not only was he unwilling to exclude the talent of women from his orchestra for tradition's sake, he also had a precise sense of fairness. Karen Cook, an executive at Banker's Life and Casualty, recalls when Abravanel's style got her a raise. "I was working for Crawford Gates in the Music Department at BYU. Abravanel was in the office, going 90 miles per hour. He'd been in many times and I guess he thought I did good work. All of a suqden, he stopped and said, 'I hope you're being paid what you're worth.' Then he steamed into Mr. Gates office to ask. The next paycheck I had a raise," Cook says. Abravanel has been supporting and promoting females, especially female musicians, for years, but when I asked him abm,1t female conductors, he was reserved. He questions their physical power. He says that it takes physical strength to "keep the woodwinds and string section from falling apart." The only female conductor I know of is Antonia Brico, so I asked about her. "I hate talking about her," he says. "She's totally without a sense of hum~r." Then he adds with a bite that she is a"pitiful" conductor who has had noto;iety because of the film Judy Collins made about her and "because she's a woman." "It's sexism in reverse!" he concludes. Are there good female conductors? Abravanel describes Rachel Worby of the Spokane Symphony as "very gifted ... lots of spunk." Maurice Abravanel is retired and he and his wife, Lucy, divide their time between Salt Lake City and Santa Barbara, California. Most months they can be found in a modest home in Salt Lake. The study in which we sit is a large room in the basement lit only by a small desk lamp. His desk, piled high with stacks of correspondence, books and sheet music, is against the wall. The desk chair turns toward the center of the room and next to the west wall of his study is his grand piano, with stacks of sheet music piled on top. The room smells like old sheet music. I ask if he plays. "Almost everyday," he says. "l find that ifl go three days without music, without my piano, I get nervous." A floor to. ceiling mirror covers the east wall and I wonder aloud if Abravanel used it to practice conducting. "l never used the mirror or any mirror in my life," he insists. The mirror came with the house, he says. "l actually bought the house because of the shower. It was supposed to have a six~way shower which I was going to use after conducting. It didn't work. I tried to have it fixed. They even demolished the • wall trying. It has never worked." What has worked is the Utah Symphony. When Abravanel took over as conductor in 194 7, they played 10 concerts per year. They now play over 200, -have recorded 168 works by 45 composers, and have been hailed by a number of critics as one of the top twelve symphony orchestras in the country. "You cannot go anywhere NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 7 SOME Of THE SIGHTS IN ALTA ... ... ARE DELICIOUS. For over 40 years, the Alta Lodge has been famous for gourmet dining. New to our menu this year is Marseilles Bouillabaisse ... a delighttu: fish stew. 322-4631 (Salt Lake Direct 742-3500 (Canyon) 1HE UTAH OPERA COMPANY PRESENTS One Great Season After Another! on this planet and speak to music lovers who will not know Utah and the Utah Symphony," Abravanel says. The reason? Wendell Ashton, President of the Utah Symphony board for fifteen years, says that the reputation and success of the orchestra are a result of Abravanel's work. "Culturally, the man is unique in the history of the state," says Ashton. "He is not only a great power for culture but a unifying power as well." Ashton sees Maurice Abravanel as a bridging force. "Mormons, non-Mormons, young and old, rich ancl poor-Maurice has brought the people together." Lloyd Bliss agrees. "Maurice wants everyone to love music, regardless of religious or cultural background." Reflecting on the Mormon/non-Mormon issue further, she says, "He has given his life, since coming to Salt Lake, to erase the line between Mormons and non-Mormons, and he's done very well." When I ask Abravanel about his influence in this community, he talks about the music first, then the Mormon/ nonMormon gap. "Before I came here, I was told that Salt Lake was an impossible community-split between Mormons and non-Mormons. I am not a Mormon. And I am aware of the foibles they have and which I have. But, remember, they settled here first," Abravanel says. "I have tried to bridge over-to make the Utah Symphony the meeting ground not only for religions but for people of all professions, all ages, all walks of life. I think I succeeded and am proud of that." He pauses. "Very proud of that." Will Maurice Abravanel conduct the Utah Symphony again? "I wish he would," says Wendell Ashton, "we could raise a lot of money and I'd like the money." Ashton also says that he respects Abravanel's reluctance to conduct. He says that since his retirement, Abravanel hasn't felt as skilled and feels he couldn't perform at his best. "It's a miracle to get results from 80 musicians," Abravanel says, .. and it takes a lot out of you. When I retired, everyone, including me, thought that I was passionate about conducting and would miss it. What I discovered was that I was passionate about music and I will always have that." --- AIDA TOSCA D0R 610VltRRI October 27, 29, ~ I November 2, 198~ January 26, 28, W February 1, 1984 May 10, 12, 14, 16, 1984 Plus AMAHL AND THE NIGHT VISITORS December 9 and 10, I 98.3 DON'T MISS OUT, Save 15% Subscribe Now! Skip Branch is a partner of Branch and Jones advertising and a member of Network's editorial board. Charge your tickets over the phone to VISA, Mastercard or American· Express, phone [phone] THE OPERA-There's only one! 8 NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 "May I help you, Attila?" E mployees who answer the phone or face clients or manage those who do, need skills which allow them to deal effectively with hostile or annoyed people. If you are amanager of employees providing services, your first task, of course, is to run such an efficient and friendly operation that customers have little reason to complain. In order to anticipate sources of irritation, every service manager should take the role of the customer or client and actually walk through the process. Are the lines too long? The forms too complicated? How many people must be talked to before the information needed is available? Are complaints handled systematically? Are orders processed quickly? Is each customer informed of potential problems or delays in service? Can this task be accomplished during a lunch hour? Are business hours convenient? When calls come in are clients left on hold more than a minute or so? How does it feel to sit in the waiting room? As a service manager, you are looking for situations which increase people's discomfort, anxiety, powerlessness, frustration. When you find these situations, change them. And be creative in solving the problems. The worst reason to keep those same office hours or forms or receptionists is "because_we've always done it that way." This kind of problem-solving not only improves your product or service but protects your employees from unnecessary abuse. For those of you who find yourselves facing angry customers from time to time, there are ways of coping. I experienced the best and the worst service from the same company a few years ago. A friend and I were watching a television documentary produced by a Salt Lake television station. We both found the approach biased, offensive and objectionable. (Need I say, the topic was the Equal Rights Amendment.) My friend got to the phone first and called the station. Whoever answered the phone proceeded to argue with her that the program was not biased, that she was only a minority in this community, that her views were invalid. Fifteen minutes of conversation intensified her anger and when she hung up, she immediately wrote the Federal Communications Commission. Perhaps the station management had wised up by the time I called because the station representative's response to my one minute diatribe against the station and the program, was perfect. "I understand your point of view," she said. "And we appreciate your call. We keep a record book of calls here at the station and I'll record your comments in the book." I was silent. What could I say? She had heard me. She didn't say she agreed with me, but she ~ad listened and recorded my complaint. Defused, I thanked her, hung up, resolved to write the F.C.C., but somehow I never did get around to it. The second approach was more efficient as well as more effective. It took two minutes instead of fifteen. I was not satisfied but I was calmed. My attitude toward the station improved while my friend's had deteriorated. Here are some approaches you might want to try next time Attila the Hun is your customer. First of all, never take the anger personally. People are not mad at you. They're mad at the system or product, or they were born mad, or it's just a bad day. Once you feel personally attacked you will be too busy fighting back to do what you are paid to do, serve people and solve problems. However, since you're the one under attack that's tough advice to follow. Some people find it helps to count to ten inside your head. Others repeat to themselves, "She is not mad at me." The point is, do anything to delay your reaction. Sometimes all the complainers really want is to have somebody listen to them. They need to ventilate. Hear them out. A few sympathetic "I understand" often helps. Or paraphase the problem back to them. Use your own words, not theirs, so they will know you are not parroting but have really heard them. The next important step is to deal with the problem. At best you might find a creative solution; at least you must explain the standard way such a problem is solved. Don't quote rules and regulations. State the situation positively. Dru Scott, a customer services consultant, says the single most important technique is to learn to stop saying what you or the customers can't do and say instead what they or you can do. Not "We're not open on Saturday," but "We'd be glad to help you any day Monday through Friday." Not "You can't use our xerox machine; it's against the rules," but "You can make copies next door at the copy center.'' Scott recommends practicing starting each sentence with "you can" or "we can." The by-product of this positive orientation to clients and customers is personal. It produces greater job satisfaction and less stress for you. It also generates good will for your company or organization, and helps that company prosper so that it can pay your salary and reward you with the promotion you deserve for providing real service to people. Brenda Hancock is the organizational development specialist for Salt Lake County government and an adjunct assistant professor of communication at the University of Utah. Now yoU're talking Utah KondayUlra l'rtday • JIM KIRKWOOD 6-9 a.m. PrQgram Schedule • JIM DABAKIS 9 a.m.-noon • JOHN PRINCE 4-6 p.m. KZJO talk radio 63 NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 9 Mediterranean Hair Styling Salons $1000 .OFF Mediterranean Sculpture Cut $900 L°:!alr ON PERM-1.ong Hair Extra With This Coupon- · 5624 So. 900 E. 262-8292 (Murray) 1975 E. 6200 So. 277-0893 <Holladay) • 924 E. 900 So. 322-5533 (Salt Lake City) Come try our 40 Thieves Cake, and learn what "Open Sesame" really means SMITH& Mention this ad for 15% off custom orders and accessories. Initial consultation at no charge. ~ 801-363-0990 103 Social Hall Avenue baked goods• cafe •cappuccino• catering• 1460 foothill dr. • salt lake city· 583-5155 ~ Salt Lake City, Utah 84111 BURTON I N T £ A I O A S To protect you, calls cha!ied t9 your number will have to meet • with your approval. We want to protect you from fraud or mistakenly having long distance calls billed to your number. So we're now requiring verification on all pay phone calls billed to a third number. That means if your number is to be billed, our operators will ask either you or someone at your home or business to approve each call when it's made. And if the line is busy or nobody answers, the operator won't complete the call. If you place a third number call yourself, you do have billing alternatives. You can call collect or pay for it in coin. The fastest, easiest way, however, is to charge the call to a Bell System Calling Card.* But should s9meone want to charge a call to you, we'll make sure it meets with your approval. So calls you don't want to pay for aren't made at your expense. For the way you live. @ Mountain Bell *To order a Calling Card. call your service representative. 10 NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 Taking Stock -In Network: 12 New Owners Point Network Toward The Future At the beginning of a new era for Network, new investors join with founding stockholders and the Network staff to insure it will continue to offer its best to Utah's women and to the men who work with them. by Mary Gaber Network needed new investors. That was the message Karen Shepherd, editor, most urgently conveyed to the small group of stockholders at the March 1983, annual meeting. Yes, Network was by now the oldest magazine of its kind in the U.S.; yes, it had grown and developed and improved even in the midst of a deepening recession. However, for five years, a small devoted staff had worked for low or no salaries in order to hold the capital requirements at a minimum. Shepherd said that the staff members and their families had made emotional and financial sacrifices for an extended period of time and that she could not ask them to do it any longer. Furthermore, money was needed to promote subscriptions so that Network could grow more quickly. Many of the signs pointing to Network's future were promising. Thousands of subscribers who had been getting complementary copies of Network responded to an editorial request that they subscribe. A February 1983 subscription promotion yielded a 12 percent return, a remarkably high response for any kind of direct mail solicitation. But without asking the same people to contribute more, Network simply did not have the funds available to keep the momentum going. Shepherd saw three choices. "I could continue going on as I had been, but that was not an acceptable choice. I could look for investors, or I could quit." For the first time, she acknowledges, she was ready to quit. "We were operating as though we were a non-profit corporation, by relying on people's devotion," she says, "But we couldn't offer people a tax deduction which would make it worth while for them to contribute to us, and we are ineligible for grant and foundation money." The possibility of converting from a profit to a non-profit corporation was thoroughly investigated. "It's very difficult for magazines to maintain a non-profit status. Both Ms. and Mother Jones are having trouble with the IRS because they are nonprofit," recalls Shepherd. "Besides I've always been determined that Network needs Jinnah Kelson: Founder, working behind the scenes from the beginning. to practice what it preaches and be a model for women in business. My goal is to make it a successful business." My mind fills with memories as I write of Network's continuing struggle. I had been its first editor. The idea for Network had grown in my imagination as a result of my keen sense of isolation as a woman working in a mostly male business community. As a reporter at Enterprise covering the city's business activities, I regularly found that before I could get any work done, I had to spend time (or was it wasting time?) overcoming the discomfort the men l dealt with were having, as they worked, often for the first time, with a woman. I looked around and saw how many women were working, realized that we must all be in the same situation, and conceived of a publication which would build a system of support, communication and reinforcement for working women. Jinnah Kelson, the director of the Phoenix Institute, and Lynne Van Darn, the director of publications for the Institute, had also been thinking about the need in the community for such a publication. Our ideas were a perfect fit. When we first met, Kelson said simply: "I'll help you." And Network was born. Within three weeks I had quite my job at the Enterprise. Kelson and I spent three months dreaming and planning, writing and planning some more. We raised $1,500 and felt rich. We sent letters to women asl;cing them .t o subscribe and they did. The work was staggering, the expenses higher than we had imagined, the progress slower than we had anticipated. After working nine months for what seemed like 24 hours a day, I became exhausted and left. Lynne Van Dam took over as editor, formed the editorial board which even now guides Network's editorial policy, and asked Karen Shepherd to consider becoming a stockholder and editor. For two years Shepherd and Van Dam worked together and then Van Dam moved on, leaving Shepherd as publisher/editor. Another two and one half years passed, years in which Network matured and became an important community publication. The format was Jeanne Shaw: Office manager, holding the gang together, and coordinating the Women's Index and Resource Guide. constantly refined, the editorial content was continuously scrutinized with the goal of precisely reflecting the burgeoning sense of capability Utah women feel. Network won prizes for its journalism, two from the National Journalism Society, Sigma Delta Chi, and one for its artistic capability, from the Utah Ad Federation. Still the growth did not match the increased expenses of production. In the end, Network needed what all businesses need-operating capital. The time had come when devotion and hard work were no longer an effective substitute for money. Jinnah Kelson, with Shepherd the majority stockholder in Network, and one of the people who had put in hundreds of volunteer hours, agreed that perhaps the time had come to give up. Neither felt they First Shepherd went to Barbara and Norman Tanner, longtime Network subscribers and influential community leaders. They instantly agreed to invest. As a result of their enthusiastic response, Shepherd planned and prepared the appropriate documents to make a limited stock offering to qualified investors. "The response was exciting, overwhelming, unanticipated," says Kelson. "Everyone we asked was enthusiastic," says Shepherd. "I guess I had been working too hard to notice how much people had come to rely on Network." What will be the effect of the new owners on the editorial content of Network? Without exception, the new owners want nothing substantial about content or editorial direction to change. "Network is Barbara and Norman Tanner: 0 lf you disagree with community opinion you often stand alone. The voice of Network is unprejudiced and open.'' could ask their families to contribute more. "In April I felt sure Karen was even more attached to the publication_ than she was admitting and I also knew she was tired. I was prepared to say, 'no,"' says Kelson. "No more schemes. Still I knew that with her creative mind, Karen would come up with yet one more way to make it. Looking for investors seemed like a wild idea. It had all been such a struggle for us that I felt sure no one in their right minds would buy stock in Network." As Shepherd tells it, part of the energy to look for substantial investors came from the confidence of Lee Brennan and the encouragement of Lynne Van Dam. 0 I thought of myself as a reader," says Shepherd, "who woke-up one day to find Network gone before I had the opportunity to do anything about it. I felt it would be missed, so I decided to ask some people who have the resources to help, whether they thought the paper was worth investing in." Deni Christian: Art Director, taking newsprint artistry to its highest level. the voice of the other Utah," says community leader Esther Landa, "We need an outlet for people who believe in equality of opportunity. I hope that in the future it keeps on doing what it has been doing-except I hope it can use larger type." Jo Ann Freed sees Network as a "focus, a rallying place around which women can safely discuss significant issues." She believes the publication appeals to women of a variety of ages in diverse circumstances. ''Through Network, women can find the motivation to do what we need to do with our lives," she says. Tina Martin sees Network as one of two or three vehicles in the state which support women. "And one of my goals in life is to change things for women." She is aware of the effectiveness of the group which has come together around Network. "I like the idea of making an investment in something I believe in which also has the power to influence the community." Michelle Fey: Illustrator, filling in when the crunch comes. Nancy Mitchell: Oirect,or of advertising, on vacation and not pictured. NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 11 Esther Landa and Karen Shepherd: Working for quality and taking risks close to the heart. Stockholde.rs of Network Publications Kay Berger agrees with that. "I know this can work," she says. "It's a good paper, and just as it is, it serves an important purpose in the community." Judy Reagan invested because it's part of her commitment to women's issues. An active community organizer and homemaker, Reagan would like Network to write for women whose work is their homes, though they aren't paid for it, as well as for women ar.d men in paid employment. "I don't want recipes," she says. "But I'd like to read stories that relate directly to my life." exciting to invest in what I care about. When I saw who else is on the board of directors, I realized I would be working with people I like and care about and I don't get to see very often. I would invest just for the company." Publishing is hard business acknowledges Esther Landa who was one of the first new investors. "Of course, it's a risk, but ifl'm going to take a risk," she says, "I prefer to do it with something that is close to my heart." If the new owners are cautiously realistic about whether their investment "TO GET IT RIGHT, BE BORN WITH LUCK OR ELSE MAKE IT. NEVER GIVE UP. GET THE KNACK OF GETTING PEOPLE TO HELP YOU AND ALSO PITCH IN YOURSELF. A LITTLE MONEY HELPS, BUT WHAT REALLY GETS IT RIGHT IS TO NEVER - I REPEAT- NEVER UNDER ANY CONDITIONS FACE THE FACTS." -Ruth Gordon from Myself Among Others Terrell Dougan echoes. "Utah women need to compare notes about their lives, especially women who are trying to have it all-husband, children, career-Network helps them do that." I wondered why these people had decided to invest. "I don't expect to make a lot of money," says Maggie Wilde. "But I don't expect to lose it either. This is not a contribution to a cause. It is a commitment." Wilde says that when she was approached "there was no question of whether or not I would buy stock. The only question was how much. I believe fervently, strongly: women a_n d people who share our interest in working toward a better life need to pm their money where their mouth is." Eunice Shatz, who believes that '(this community can't do without it," invested in Network in order to preserve the option it offers women as a forum to discuss and solve their problems. "Such a vehicle is needed here more than other places," she says. Says Genevieve Atwood, "My investment is a vote of confidence. It is Gail Gutsche: Editor of the Official Rumor, advertising representative and writer. will make them money, they are equally committed to giving Shepherd th.! opportunity t.o put it in sound financial condition. Above all, they share her sense of commitment to Network and her belief that it can contribute to a better life for Utahns. "The world has changed," says Shepherd. "Network can help women and men understand each other as they learn to live and work together in new ways." Can Network actually change the quality of life in Utah? When I asked Barbara and Norman Tanner whether they see Network as a change agent in the community, Norman says, "Network won't necessarily change people's opinions, but I think men should read it. It can help them see how women think. Men exposed to Network can find reinforcement for the idea that women are equals." Barbara says, "Norman and I want to do what we can to improve this community. Although we grew up here and we love Salt Lake, Utah has one drawback. It is isolated intellectually. If you want your intellectual freedom in this state, you pay a price. If you disagree with community Susan Lyman: Editor of the State Scene and writer. *Genevieve Atwood: Past state legislator, Director, Utah Geological and Mineral Survey *Kay Berger: Community leader; partner in Kohagen/Berger Realtors Lee Brennan: Deputy Salt Lake County Assessor Cris Coffey: Art Director, Network from l 978~ 1983 *Terrell Dougan: Community leader, writer, actress, fitness nut *Jo Ann Freed: Immediate Past Chair, Utah Arts Council Mary Gaber: Resources Coordinator, Planned Parenthood of Utah - Anita Gander: Clinical Director, Catholic Community Services Jinnah Kelson: Director, Phoenix Institute *Esther R. Landa: Community leader, member President's Advisory Committee for Women 1977,80 *Tina Martin: Counselor, Women's Resource Center, University of Utah *Judy Reagan: Community leader, homemaker Helen Robinson: A past social worker and current candidate for an industrial engineering degree *Eunice Shatz: Dean, University of Utah School of Social Work Karen Shepherd: Editor/publisher of Network, president Network Publications *Vincent Shepherd: President, Shepherd Oil Company Incorporated *Barbara Tanner: Community leader, founder, Utah Girls' Village *Norman Tanner: Community leader, past president 0.C. Tanner Company ' Lynne Van Dam: Actress, freelance public relations *Maggie Wilde: Director of Public Affairs, Utah Department of Natural Resources *New Stockholders Serving on the Board of Directors of Network Publications are: Genevieve Atwood, Lee Brennan, Jo Ann Freed, Jinnah Kelson, Esther R. Landa, Helen Robinson, Eunice Shatz, Karen Shepherd, Barbara Tanner; Elaine Weis, Director of the Utah Department of Financial Institutions. opinion, you often stand alone. The voice of Network is one of common sense; it's unprejudiced and it's open." • Supporting Network's freedom to confront real problems and examine them with integrity and honesty is a major motivating factor of every investor. Lee Brennan adds one more reason: "It is important not to be defeated," she says. Vincent Shepherd, Karen's husband and one of the family members who has already contributed substantialiy, agrees. "I never intended to buy stock but as I watched Karen seek investors, I found myself wanting' to be part of it. I guess her Marshall Ralph: Director of circulation / promotion, writer, editor, wit. determination has made a believer of me. Besides it's a man's prerogative to change his mind." Looking, finally, at the opportunity to succeed financially, Shepherd sums up: "The response to our search for investors is a tremendous validation of the publication. It has made every minute of these long years of work worth it." I agree. ,:::,._ . . . . . =;; Mary Gaber is resources coordinator at Planned Parenthood Association of Utah, a writer, and was the first editor of Network. Cris Coffey: Moving on . Much loved ;;ind greatly missed . 12 NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 FICTION The Devil's Music by Kristen Rogers Ellis is picking cashews out of a bowl of salted nuts while Mitchell plays checkers with her sister Ann. Ellis is watching them. They're giggling. When Mitchell pounces on his own piece and makes three noisy jumps, Ann shrieks. "Oh, you big bully!" He grins and leans back with his arms folded across his chest. "Let's see you get out of that," he says. Ellis scrabbles a little in the nuts, but it seems that the cashews are gone. ••• Boys always thought Ellis was gorgeous, if dumb. Or naive, rather. They called her the Treasure Chest, but she would only date boys who were Spiritual. Once, Brent Perry asked her out for a Bible-reading date, and they had read all the way into the third chapter of Matthew, out loud, before she realized that his mind wasn't on the verses. Although she brushed his hands away, he continued his forays all the way into the Sermon on the Mount, when she began to cry in frustration. "Aw, for Pete's sake," said Brent Perry, "what did I do?" "Why can't you guys leave me alone?" *** M i tchell worked part-time in the paint department of Sears. He was efficient, courteous, and dean-cut, and the department manager couldn't stand him. Once he saw Mitchell talking to an old woman, who was obviously impressed by this shorn, white-shirted boy. Mitchell talked earnestly on and on, gesturing with his hands, and she nodded wholeheartedly while two or three customers waited with paint cans handing from their arms. "Over here," said the manager. While he rang up the sales he saw Mitchell hand the lady some leaflets, put his arm around her shoulders, and give her a little squeeze. She walked off smiling. She had not bought any paint. When Ellis came in to buy a can of sunshine yellow, Mitchell looked her up and down. He liked girls to wear th_eir hair long. He also believed that girls shouldn't be seen in slacks. Ellis, her hair ribboned and hanging down the back of a flowered dress, walked up the rows of paint, meticulously studying the labels. He walked over to her. "Can I help you, miss?" he said. He thought her eyes were remarkable. Like a fawn, he thought. She told him what she wanted. "It's for our apartment," she said, averting her eyes. He took her arm. "These are exterior paints," he said. "Over here we have the interior." He sold her the paint and got a date. Ellis wasn't the type to get picked up, but she thought she saw in him a goodness so obvious that it shone from his face. Besides, he had made a comment about the imminent fulfillment of a prophecy found in the Revelation of John ( this, while a woman with a gallon of stain tucked under each arm glared at them and tapped her foot) in a way that sent tremors thro1,1gh her abdomen. *** Fay, the mother of Ellis and Ann, comes through the kitchen door, balancing a tray of steaming cups. She sets it on the coffee table just as Mitchell makes his last jump. Ann pushes her chair back, pouting, and with a toss of her head she walks over to peer into the cups. "Chamomile tea," says Fay. "It's very restful, you know." "l guess I'll fix me some hot chocolate," says Ann. Ellis decides that Mitchell will come sit by her now. He lifts a mug off the tray. "Thank you, Mother," he says, settling into a recliner by the fire. "You'll ruin your complexion," says Fay. *** He took her to a movie. After twenty minutes of huddling side by side in the anonymous crowd (neither daring to use the armrest) he suddenly cupped his mouth to her ear. "Come on," he whispered. She cocked her head. "What?" "Shhh. Let's get out of here." "Why?" "Shhh." He stood up, pulling her with him and guiding her past jutting knees and feet. "Sorry," she said to each unseen face. "I'm sorry." In the lobby she asked him again, why. She looks sweet in ruffles, he thought. "It was turning into a nude scene," he said. "A bed scene." She looked at him uncertainly. He could see how naive she really was. "They weren't married," He was trying to be patient. "Oh," she said. "I'd like a refund," he said. The cashier raised her languid eyebrows. "A refund? Why?" Ellis stood against the wall. "This movie is trash." "Just don't be surprised if you see your theater unfavorable mentioned in the letters to the editor," he said. They went outside. "What if they were married," Ellis asked, "would we have to leave then?" Mitchell didn't answer immediately. "Yes," he said finally. Ellis thought she had never met anyone with such strong moral convictions. *** I n Book Club Ellis read Tess of the D'Urbervilles-at least part of it. It was rather dull, she thought. Book Club was formed by a group of eight wives who, putting their husbands through school, dediced not to give up their own educations. Ellis was horrified to learn, at the monthly discussion, of Tess's sad end. Such a nice girl, she had thought, but not real bright. • "Why?" she whispered to Mary Ellen during the discussion. "Why was she hanged?" Mary Ellen shrugged. "Just Fate, I guess." But when it came out that the sister ended up with the guy, Ellis was skeptical. What kind of a book is that? After the others had dismissed Thomas Hardy and turned to other matterswho was pregnant, who did Linda's hair, the sale at the mall-Ellis let the matter roll over and over through her mind. She slid forkfuls of Chocolate Freezer Desert into her mouth, smoothing the whipped cream with her tongue, and wondering if one was as good as the other ·,..) Angel. She thinks of Tess now as she watches Ann tickle Mitchell's stockinged feet. Ann has long fingernails which she paints burgundy and she runs them up and down the soles of his feet. Mitchell doesn't laugh, because he isn't ticklish. Later, in the bedroom where Ellis slept as a child, Mitchell stares gloomily out the window. "Rain at Christmas," he says. "Christmas was yesterday," she says hopefully. "lt didn't rain yesterday." "I know for a fact it's snowing in Montana," he says. "You don't try to be a wife," she said. "You just are." The cashier shrugged. "Everyone's entitled to their own opinion," she said. • "You shouldn't be showing it." The cashier had moist red lips. She laughed. "It's not that bad ." MitchelLleaned across the counter toward her. "Oh yes it is! It's immoral!" She was unaffected. "I'll have to call the manager," she said in a bored voice. In a few minutes a short man in a red jacket came hurrying down the aisle toward them. He was smiling. "What can I do for you, then?" he said. "I want my money back," said Mitchell. "I'm sorry, we don't make any refunds," said the man, smiling. Mitchell poked his finger in the man's chest and backed him against the counter. "Listen, you," he said. "People like you are corrupting our communities. This film is trash and I want my money back!" The man was no longer smiling. "Look, buddy," he said, "We don't guarantee satisfaction. We just sell tickets." Ellis edged toward Mitchell . "Come on," she said. "Let's just go, okay?" He glared at her, then again at the manager. 6885 S. State Street Midvale, Utah 84047 801/255-5700 "But we were with your family last year," she says. "My first Christmas married." "Don't start that again," he says. "And don't start to cry." She begins to cry. She looks so fragile in lace, he thinks, going to the suitcase for his toothbrush. "Mitchell," she says in a tiny voice, but he is gone. *** They dated every weekend for a. month. "Not on weeknights," he told her. "I have to study." After a degree in organizational behavior, he planned to get an MBA. On their third date they sat in a booth, silently sipping sodas, searching each other's eyes. People at the other tables gave them strange looks at first, then forgot about them. How rosy she looks in pink, he thought. "I have this feeling about you," Mitchell said. "In fact, I've never felt so strongly about anything in my life." Ellis began to be flustered. You 're different from all the rest," he said. "You are a woman who truly, truly loves God." Heat spread across her cheeks. "Do you know how rare that is?" he said. She felt a current flick through her body, she who had been waiting for this moment, had suffered through dozens of rude hands and lips to find him. Mitchell reached across the table, took her hand, and earnestly pressed it. "That's an important quality to me," he said. He reached into his back pocket and pulled out a piece of paper. With reverence he unfolded it and smoothed it out on the table. "I always carry this with me," he said, passing it to her. "Read it." "What I want in a wife," the paper said. Ellis glanced at the list, not daring to exhale, and handed it back. Mitchell and Ellis are playing pinochle against Ann and her boyfriend, Zarr. Ann is giggling and playing with Zarr's foot under the table. Mitchell is growing more and more grim. Pinochle is a traditional game in this family, but he has never heard of it before. "Look," he keeps saying, "let's forget this stupid game. Let's play hearts." Fay comes in with a plate. "What's that?" says Ann. "Soy fritters," says Fay. "l thought you all might be hungry." "Aw, Fay," says Zarr, "Soy fritters! How did you know that's my favorite?" He pats her rump gently as she stands at the table, looking benevolent. "They're packed with nutrients," she says. Mitchell takes one and nibbles on it. ·.,1 think Mrs. Wilkes brought over some caramel corn," says Ann. "I'll go find it." Ellis' father, who has been reading the paper, sets it down and comes over to the table. "When I was in college," he says, "We played pinochle every Friday night. " "We know," says Fay. "Aha!" says Zarr, "now we know what Frank was like in the old days. Racey!" "Only, we played for money," says Frank. "No gambling," says Mitchell. "Absolutely not." "Just for pennies," says Ann, coming in with a plate of fudge. "Let's do it." "It's not the money," says Mitchell. "We could use peanuts," says Ellis. "Wait. I'll get the jar of pennies Mom keeps by the sink," says Ann. Mitchell lays his hand down and stands up. "Forget it," he says. Ellis looks after him, her eyes bright with an appeal he doesn't see. He sits on the couch and takes up the newspaper. "Stay there,Ellis," says her father. "I'll take his hand." Ann returns with the pennies and they begin to bid. "Nice hand," says Fay, who is standing behind Ann. Ann takes the bid. "Trumps?" asks Frank. "Oh, it'll definitely be hearts," says Fay. "Look, Mom, why don't you play this hand?" says Ann. "Oh, no, I like to watd1." FOR CARE THAT GOES · BEYOND BIRTH CONTROL Complete Exam with Pap Smear $30.00 Eve. Hours Available 70 S. 900 E. Salt Lake City 322-5571 4568 Highland Dr. Holladay 272-4231 7888 So. Redwood Rd. WestJordan 561-3952 Judy Donnell, °""1er Am~rica's finest selection of unfinished furniture Planned Parenthoocr NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 13 . "Here," says Ann, laying her hand down. "It's all yours." Fay picks up the cards with an embarrassed smile and Ann plunks down beside Mitchell to read over his shoulder. "Ellis, it's your turn," says Frank. Three times during the game he needs to say this. "Oooh!" squeals Fay. "We took it!" She gathers up the little pile of pennies. By now Mitchell is stretched out before the fire and Ann is rubbing his back. "Your deal, Ellis," says Frank, sliding the pack toward her. She looks at it dully. "Naw," says Zarr. "That's it for me. C'mon, woman." Ann jumps up and pokes Mitchell in the ribs with her toe. "Don't fall asleep, Mitchie," she laughs. He makes a move as if to grab her by the ankle. *** They were swinging in the park. For awhile Mitchell pushed Ellis while she giggled and her dress billowed up. Then he took the swing beside hers and they became serious and held hands and talked in low tones. He said, "Do you know what day this is?" "No." "Our anniversary. We met exactly two months ago." She smilP.d sweetly. How luminous she is, he thought. A treasure. "Do you know what I'd like to do to you?" he said. "I think I'll tickle you." "Oh!" she shrieked. She popped off the swing and began to run across the grass, but in only a moment he had caught her and lifted her onto the ground, pinning her writsts with one hand. "Now you get it," he said. He began to stroke her ribs. Her body twitched. "No!" she said. "No!" His fingers began to explore, feeling the spaces between the ribs, touching each one, moving upward in rhythmic strokes that made her jerk and turn her head from side to side. "No!" she screamed. "Stop it!" His hands became mechanical and furious and he dug into her sides until she was sobbing and panting. He let her squirm loose to run away again, laughing, out of breath. He chased her, feigning at times as if he would catch her, then letting her get away. He felt power rise within him and he caught her and swung her giggling to the ground and he crouched over her. She looked up with her green luminous eyes and he held her down. They were both breathing fast. Gradually the laughing and the breathing .slowed. He was sitting on her legs, watching her, when suddenly his face went hard. "That's enough now," he said. He got up. ''What's wrong?" she said. "Nothing," he said. She didn't dare to bother him during the drive home. Mitchell has l:;,•,o go skiing. "At least they've got snow in Mammoth," he • said. "although it's probabl/ not what I call snow." Ellis doesn't know how to ski. She has offered to learn, but he says it would be a waste of time and money, so at six this morning she stood on the porch, hugging her bathrobe to her, waving. It's been twelve hours since then. Zarr and Ann were playing pool, but now they wonder if Ellis wants to go out for a hamburger. She considers; they insist; and they all get into Ann's car. Zarr sits in the back and leans up between the seats, an elbow on each one. He comments on this or that to make the girls laugh; he fingers Ellis' cheek and tells her she's sweet and Ann reaches back to swat him. Ellis tries to feel guilty, but Mitchell will not have to know. They'll be back before he gets home. *** The summer before she met Mitchell, Ellis visited her married sister in Phoenix. They had sat up late every night for a week, lying on lounge chairs on the back lawn, sipping drinks. Ellis wanted to know what it was • like, being married. Bonnie frowned. "I don't know," she said. "Just work, I guess." "Oh, I know that," said Ellis. She was staring into the sky. Her fingertips brushed tips of the grass, back and forth, as they talked. and ask them to dance. Ann grabs the arm of the tallest. "No thanks," says Ellis. "On, come on, El," says Ann. "Come on," says the boy. "I can't," says Ellis. "I'm married." Ann shakes her head and the three walk away. Ellis, alone at the table, feels a stab of panic. She sits with her knees on the table. Her eyes are wide and only cautiously able to glance around. The red~haired boy sees this and feels safe in sitting beside her. "Hi," he says. She is startled. "Come here much?" She shakes her head. Never. "Kind of a weird place," he says. She looks at him. His face is pale and fluxuating in the colored lights. She smiles and feels like they are secret allies, outnumbered by the enemy. He liked girls to wear their hair long. He also believed that girls shouldn't he seen in slacks. Sitting on the couch in her living room, he felt the hard edge of the velvet box against his heart. "Ellis," he said, "I have something important to tell you." She looked placidly into his eyes. How pure she is, he thought. "I have had a revelation from God," he said. "About you. "Me?" He nodded solemnly. "God has confirmed you as my choice for a wife. She waited. "Well?" he said. "What do you say?" "I can't think of anything to say." "But do you accept?" He was so spiritual. "I think so," she said. He took her hand. "We can't argue with God, can we?" Then he brought out the box and laid it in her palm. When she lifted the lid her lips tightened for an instant at the ornateness of the ring, but she turned to him with gratitude in her eyes nevertheless as he slipped it on her finger and kissed her for the first time. *** 11 "Still, it's an interesting place to watch people, he says. Ann and Zarr are dancing. She thinks they look foolish. "Yeah," she says. She looks apologetic. With her thumb she has twisted her diamond so that it is hidden in her palm, as if she were afraid to hurt his feelings. "I don't think so." "Okay. Whatever. Do you want me to leave?" "Well," she says. "I guess not." After a few minutes of talking she begins to relax, to feel almost girlish. She smiles to watch I t is one in the morning when Ann and Ellis pull into the driveway. They are laughing. "You've been a naughty girl, Ellie," says Ann. "Mitch is gonna spank you." "Yeah," says Ellis, sliding out the door. Her face is luminous and something of fire shines in her eyes. "He might." She stops. Silhouetted in the open front door, his arms folded across his chest, is Mitchell. "Hi, honey," she says. "Where've you been?" he says. "Out with Ann and Zarr," she says. She slips past him into the house. "l'm going to bed," says Ann. "Enjoy yourselves." Mitchell takes Ellis by the elbow and leads her to their room, her old bedroom, talking in a furious whisper. He asks her where they were, why so late (Dancing? Dancing?!!! Who with?). She becomes quiet. She hardly hears the Are you happy here, being married?" Ann and Zarr clowning on the dance floor, and questions, and then the lecture. He tells her that Bonnie tilted the can to her mouth. "Sure." "l don't think so," says Ellis. "You don't sound like you're happy." "Don't be silly." *** when they come over to scold her again for just sitting, she says maybe she could try dancing just once, if everyone promises not to laugh. A shower of lightdrops sweeps across the face of the boy with the red hair and he takes her by the hand. The music pulses, rushing in her eyes, filling her head. She feels giddy, and the eyes of the boy are green, like hers, pensively watching her. She feels a space yawn wide inside her body when she meets his eyes, and she prays he won't ask about the future, or the past. rock music is satanic, that it borders on adultery for her to be flirting with other men, that he has been worried and pacing all night. All the while she silently gets out of her clothes. (Jeans! he says. Jeans in public!) She pulls her nightgown down over her head and walks about the room with downcast eyes, folding clothes, brushing her hair. At last she sits on the bed and he stands over her and her hair lies brushed and shining over her shoulders; her hands are folded in her lap and she is unusually quiet. Maybe I have been too hard on her, he thinks. She is so fragile, he thinks. So devoted . "1 don't mean that kind of work," said Bonnie. "Not only that kind, anyway. It's work just trying to be a wife, I mean." Ellis looked skeptical. "You don't try to be a wife," she said. "You just are." Bonnie turned her Tab round and round between her pa.lms. Ellis decided to refocus the subject. "Can you really tell when it's the right one?" she said. "How can you tell?" Bonnie shrugged. "You just have to take a chance." Ellis sat up sudde"nly. She leaned over and looked into her sister's face. "Hey," she said. "I don't think you're happy. t 'P.el out!" says Zarr, and Ann slams her foot to the floor. Her Mustang squeals and jumps across the intersection. Ann keeps her at fifty until a few yards before the next signal. She jerks the car to a stop (Ellis clings to the door handle) and revs the engine once or twice. "Wild lady!" says Zarr. "Don't you think we ought to go home?'' - says Ellis. "Disco! You ever been to a disco, Ellie? " says Ann. "No.'' ''Wild," says Zarr. They are, shortly, seated at a table at Nightscene. Ellis stares around with an incredulous look on her face. "Is this what people do at night?" she says. Zarr stands up. "We'll see you ladies later, then," he says. "Come back here, creep," says Ann, laughing. "Well. We'll show him," she says. She smiles at a pair of guys who dutifully come over 11 He had carried the ring around for days, tucked into the breastpocket of his jacket. At the jewelers' he had sat tightlipped as salemen showed him different styles. One tried to get him to talk about his fiance-to-be, tried to joke some, but Mitchell was businesslike. He examined ring after ring, picking each up between his thumb and forefinger, turning it slowly in front of his eyes, asking (not looki~g at the salesman) the price. Finally he settled on a ring with one large stone and a small cluster of diamonds to the side. He considered it a bargain. Kristin Rol{ers is a freelance writer, primarily of fiction, who lives in Park City. ALL PURPOSE CART $89.00 Whittier Wood { ]Products READY TO FINISH, INC. 3333 South State 466-5223 _ 14 NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 Prepaid Legal Services • ? Yes\ But if you <?re 0 _ J li;ttef • woman in business gives you unlimited access to licensed attorneys for counsel, document review, preparation including wills. $.300 a day indemnification for attorney fee courtroom defense, much more. Only $1.3 a month. Call Toni Anderson, 943-9673. 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Reams 363-1 a77 Personal Health Care, Domestic and Commercial Cleaning 562-5200 266-9852 Licensed Bonded 583.JA388 NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 15 /. Elizabeth Dole: Climbing Into The Cabinet In town only briefly during a whirlwind cross-country speaking tour, Elizabeth Dole tells Utah Republicans that she never makes the bed. by Maggie St. Claire "Shortly after I was appointed Secretary of Transportation, People magazine asked for an interview with me and my husband to discuss our dual career roles. As part of the story, the photographer wanted a picture of Bob and me in the bedroom making the bed together." Elizabeth Dole, the edges of her voice blurred by her North Carolina heritage, had caught the attention of the 600 Utah Republicans attending the $125 a plate fund raising dinner. Th.ere was laughter under her words as she continued. "After the article and picture were published, I received a letter from an irate California Repuplican. He wrote that since his wife had seen the photo, he was having to help with the domestic chores." The secretary laughed out loud now. "I wrote back and told him that the only reason I had showed up was because the camera was there." Elizabeth Hanford Dole, former student body president at Duke University, Harvard Law Graduate and the first female Secretary of Transportation. She's paid her dues, having worked as deputy special assistant to the president, staff assistant to the assistant secretary of health, education and welfare, and just prior to the cabinet appointment, as assistant to President three words often used to describe her. I want to add gracious and considerate. When Dole visited in Salt Lake City in June, the Republican Party presented her · with a chronical of her personal geneology. Used to receiving useless plaques and silver bowls, she was visibly moved by the gift. Before leaving town, she personally phoned each person who had worked on the book and thanked them. The wide-friendly smile and charm, however, don't conceal the fact that she's tough. While working as a presidential assistant, she took on the Reagan inner circle. This "all male club" of presidental advisors attempted to exclude her, but she lobbied aggressively to be included in the exclusive legislative-strategy group. Newsweek reports the men viewel.d her as a political neophyte. Apparently they changed their minds. Since her appointments to the cabinet, Business Week has described her as, "Politically shrewd, (knowing) when to . buck her husband's (Kansas Senator Robert Dole) constituency in favor of her own." I spoke with her, amid the tangle and clatter of people in best dress dining on Fillet Rodeo Tenderloin au marinade and Mardi Gras Creme Torte. Dole was es ta tic about astronaut Sally Ride's feat in the Challenger. She says Ride is a symbol to all Reagan for public liason. women, illustrating that they have options, She is not, however, a stereotypicalthree-piec -suit-emasculating female bureaucrat. Intelligent, warm and human are that they can find fulfill~ent either at home or in any career. Jumping quickly (no time fo~ a question) from S~lly Ride to the women's movement, she calls it "a quiet revolution." She sees it as a revolution where women are joining the work force in record numbers, a revolution where they are attempting careers traditionally outside their realm. The results, according to Dole, will be a whole new set of problems for the government and certainly the administration. Yet, Dole can be called a hard-line Republican and, according to aides, espouses administration philosophy on most issues. She's also realistic, however, and works within that administration as a strong women's advocate. She was •instrumental in helping pass legislation that removes estate taxes for spouses, and worked on the measure that increases child care tax credits. She enthusiastically reports the IRS has been persuaded the child-care credit should be added to the short tax form. Beginning in 1984, there will be one more line on the 1040, a line which will make it easier for thousands of women to claim that deduction. That's the public side. Privately, Elizabeth Dole is a quiet, insistent voice in the ear of the president. When she took over the DOT in February, she saw.a real opportunity to help women make professional advancements within the department. As a result, she developed an 11-point plan which provides her employees with education and training opportunities. She has also increased the number of women hired. Not content to leave it there, however, she then presented the plan to President Reagan at a cabinet meeting. She reports he was interested and allowed her The trip to Salt Lake was a political visit, and Dole looked almost Edwardian in her Gibson girl hairdo and her highnecked, hand-embroidered, calf-length silk dress. She was here to praise the administration-and she did. "Despite what we read and hear about Reagan, he has appointed more women to important posts than any other president," she told the Republicans. She cited, in addition to herself, Sandra Day O'Connor to the Supreme Court, Margaret Heckler to Health and Human Services and Jean Kirkpatrick, Ambassador to the United Nations. In addition, according to Dole, many women have been appointed to head various government commissions and committees. The secretary is married to Senator Robert Dole, also a Republican from Kansas. (She's sometimes called "Mrs. Pineapple.") Her sense of humor helps her deal with theif--CO.l!lbined fame. Her , secretary reports that «N-o long ago Bob w was reading the Washington Post a the headline, 'Dole Agrees with (some) policy.' He looked up and said, 'I never agreed to that.' "Bob, you didn't," answered Elizabeth, "I did!'" My last question to her as aides are pulling her away to the next scheduled function: "Are you ever the senator's wife instead of Secretary Dole?" That wonderful smile. "Well, honey, it's no problem. It all just flows together." to recommend her ideas be implemented in other departments. To date, however, Maggie St. Clair is a writer for Northwest Energy Company. there's been no rush by the other secretaries to adopt them. RICH! RETIRE Enjoy those golden years in style With an Individual Retirement Account from The Beehive State Employees' Credit Union you can now deposit any amount up to $2,000 a year, or $4,000 for a working couple. And now any wage earner qualifies, even if he or she is already covered by an employer's pension plan. 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AT THE BEEHIVE, WE'RE BUSY ON YOUR ACCOUNTI BEEHIVE STATE EMPLOYEES' CREDIT UNION 1467 South Main Street • Salt Lake City, Utah 84115 (801 )484-8811 8:00 AM to 6:00 PM Mon-Fri HEBER WELLS BULDING DIVISION OF TRANSPORTA110N 160 Easl 300 South 10 am-2 pm Monday and Wednesday 2700 Wes! 4700 South 8 am-4 pm Tuesday-Thursday and Payday OGDEN DIVISION OF FAMILY SERVICES Frtday, 9 .00-11 .00 AM SOCIAL SERVICES OFFICE North Temple and 2nd Wes! 10.00 lo 11 ·30 AM Tues- Thurs TRAINING SCHOOL Wednesday, 1:30 to 3:30 PM STATE HOSPITAL Wednesday. 9:30 AM 10 12 00 Noon STATE CAPITOL OFFICE Room 8 -23 Slate O11,ce Building 10:00 to 2:00 Monday· 2 00 to 4 00 Friday Slalewide Toll-Free WATS Line 1-800-662-7189 1f~ ~@@W • 0 • 0 0 • 0 • 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 • 0 • • 0 ♦ 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ♦ 0 • 0 0 ♦ 0 • 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ♦ 0 • • 0 ♦ 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ♦ 0 • 0 0 ♦ 0 ♦ 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 ♦ 0 ♦ ♦ 0 • 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 • 0 ♦ 0 0 ♦ 0 ♦ 0 0 0 C' 0 0 0 0 0 • C, • ♦ 0 • 0 0 0 0 C 0 0 0 0 ♦ 0 ♦ 0 0 ♦ 0 ♦ HAIR DESIGN AND COLOR 850 East 900 South , SLC 363-3071 LOVE IS A FORCE . .. IT IS NOT A RESULT; IT IS A CAUSE. IT IS NOT A PRODUCT, IT PRODUCES. IT IS A POWER, LIKE MONEY, OR STEAM OR ELECTRICITY. IT IS VALUELESS UNLESS YOU CAN GIVE SOMETHING ELSE BY MEANS OF IT. -Anne Morrow Lindbergh Locked Rooms and Open Doors 16 NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 AUGUST HATHA YOGA CLASSES Yoga is a system of exercise that develops strength balance, flexibility and endurance as you relieve tension.and increase your energy. Beginning and intermediate classes. First class free. Call Olivia Mason for information 582-4390.23. UAWBO The monthly meeting of the Utah Association Women Business Owners at Utah First Bank, #2 Main Street at 6:30 p.m. Cost $4.00 for snacks and live music. 1-5 MID-SUMMER WEEK'S WORSHOPS Park City Institute presents eight workshops ranging in subject matter from physical fitness to business ethics and novel reading. Special family rates. Call DCE 581-5809 for information. • 2 DAYID GRISMAN QUARTET At Snowbird Center Pavilion 8 p.m. Tickets $8.00 and $9.00 5 BIG BAND DANCE NIGHT $11.00 per couple at the Snowbird Center Pavilion, 7:30 p.m. 7 SUNDAY JAZZ SERIES Mainstream at the Snowbird Center Pavilion, 2 p.m., $3.00. NOW FILM FESTIVAL At the Unitarian Church, 6th South 13th East at 7:30 p.m. "You've Come A Long Wey Maybe," film a'bout comparable worth. Admission $2.50 12 COUNTRY DANCE NIGHT $9.00 per couple at the Snowbird Center Pavilion, 7:30 p.m. 13 SECOND ANNUAL INTER CULTURAL UNDERSTANDING FESTIVAL Will be held at Fairmont Park., 9th East 23rd South 11 a.m. - 10 p.m. Intercultural feast of multi-ethnic talents. Free to public. 1 The Phoenix Institute Sojourn Project, a community-based program for troubled young women, is recruiting supportive, flexible· and non-judgmental adults to provide live-in residences for one young woman. The adult advocates' responsibilities include intensive evening and weekend supervision, support, role-modeling and' a residence. We are looking for people who are familiar with non• traditional ~lternatives for women, the specific problems of women, and community resources for youth. The Phoenix Sojourn staff will provide training, on-going support, and round-the-clock backup for crises which may arise. A monthly fee of $600 will be paid for room, board, and time spent with each young woman. For more foformation, please contact Nancy Gilpatrick, 532-5080 or 364-9628. 18 WORKSHOP ON FOCUSING Become self-actualized, self-energized. Call 266-0516 for information and details. 20 SLBPW Fundraiser For the National Education Foundation at 6:30 p.m. For information call 277-6008 (eves), 486-7455 (days). 22 ANGER MANAGEMENT For women, with Bonnie McBeth; Mondays 5:30-8:00 p.m. $75.00 Phoenix Institute 532-5080. 23 BEGINNING ASSERTION For women, with Bonnie McBeth; Tuesdays 5:30-8:00 p.m. for 7 weeks. $75.00 Phoenix Institute 532-5080. 24 INTERMEDIATE ASSERTION For women, with Bonnie McBerh; Wednesdays 5:30--8:00 p.m. for 7 weeks. $75.00 Phoenix Institute 532-5080. 25 THE GARY BURTON QUARTET $8.00 advance, $9.00 at the door at Snowbird Center Pavilion, 8 p.m. 27-28 GRAND OKTOBERFEST Free at the Snowbird Center Pavilion, Noon - 6 p.m. 31 BEGINNING ASSERTION For women and men with Susan Smith; Wednesdays 5:30-8:00 p.m. for 7 weeks. $75.00 Phoenix Institute 532-5080. 1,..J"i SEPTEMBER 1 INTERMEDIATE ASSERTION For women and men with Susan Smith; Thursday 5:30--8:00 p.m. for 7 weeks. $75.00 Phoenix Institute 532-5080. 9 RECENT PAINTINGS By Lee Deffebach. Large contemporary acrylics at Phillips Gallery 444 E. 2nd S. Tues-Fri. 10 a.m. - 2:00 Sat. 10 a.m. - 2:00 p.m. Reception on Sept. 9, 7-9 p.m. Show runs thru October 1. • 12 LAUNCHING THE FAIRMENIST REVOLUTION Men learning alternative ways of being. With Mack Gift. Mondays, for 7 weeks, 7:30-10:00 p.m. By contributions. Phoenix Institute 532-5080. Phoenix Sojourn t Events listed in the Network Calendar are paid advertisement ($6 per line). For information and placement, contact Gail Gutsche, 532-6095. Services of Utah Women's Clinic I►· - AY OGICAL P.C. OMEN'S CLINIC • .C. . ' • Wal~-in Pregnancy Testing • Professional Counseling • Family Planning • Voluntary Sterilization • Abortions • Cervical Cap • Adoption Member National Abortion Federation ~ ~i~~nli W B i r t h Center • Pelvic Pain • Infertility • Obstetrics • Artificial Insemination • Well Woman Care • Female Physician Available • Alternative Birthing • Routine Gynecological Care • Sibling Birthing Classes . • Parenting/ Pre-natal Classes • Certified Nurse Midwives Delivery • An Alternative to Hospital and Home Deliveries • Medically Safe Birth in a Family Environment • One of Utah's First Licensed Birth Centers All .above services offered confidentially by _qualified OB/GYN, nurse midwives and counseling staff 515 South 400 East. Salt Lake City, Utah 84111. [phone] or [phone]. By appointment only NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 17 Credit Cards: Blasting back at the plastic fantastic bank-busters C redit cards can be a bane or a blessing to us, depending on how prudent we are in their use. Those little pieces of plastic have become almost an extension of our very selves, giving us access to a wider range of services and products than we might otherwise have. But, they have also created financial headaches for many consumers who have used them too freely. Wisely used, they allow us the luxury of buying now and paying later-although paying too much later is expensive-and serve as an excellent record of purchases. When credit cards were first introduced, they were sent to individuals throughout the country by financial institutions who seemingly lacked concern for the creditworthiness of the recipient. They simply seemed to want to get the cards into circulation. Further, there was no charge for the use of the card, and only a nominal service charge for those not paying the full balance each month. At first they were not widely used. Maybe it was the ease of acquisition that caused the public in general to eschew their use. After all, who would dream of charging a meal? And, when we traveled, traveler's checks provided safe cash. Now, however, everyone wants them, and most people need credit cards. There is an a l fee to use them, and the service arges have risen dramatically on accounts not cleared each month. In addition, the cards aren't issued as generously as they once were, and some companies even change the rules on old customers. I ran into th ituation recently when a card I had been using was nearing expiration. The issuer sent notice that when the new cards were sent, there would be a 50 percent increase in the annual fee. Well, I resent paying those fees, and did some sleuthing to find out whether there was a way to obtain a card without a charge. What I discovered was that some credit unions make credit cards available to their creditworthy members at no annual fee, plus their service charges are lower for anyone not paying her account in full at the end of the billing period. As a result, I decided to cut,up the cards with the annual fee, and I sent them back to the institution with a note canceling the account. Look into the credit union where you work to see if it offers a nationally accepted credit card, or inquire whether you can join a credit union that does offer one to non, employees. Most credit unions require some kind_of a savings account to qualifyin addition to a good credit rating-but they also offer a fair rate of interest on those accounts. Those of us who have jobs outside our home, and especially those who travel, have almost daily need of credit cards. Renting a car, registering at a hotel or cashing a check is virtually impossible without them. Entertaining clients at lunch or dinner is a common occurrence for the professional woman, and credit card receipts provide proof of the expenditure. Additionally, consumers who make purchases through catalogs cannot order merchandise by mail without paying in advance or incurring heavy COD charges if they do not have a credit card to back up the purchase. Those who use credit cards for both business and personal purchases may find it wise to have two different cards and keep the transactions totally separate. (For instance, use Visa for business and Mastercard for personal expenditures.) For people who either cannot obtain the second card-or who choose not to have one-it is essential to maintain precise records for tax purposes. A color coding system on the monthly statement-red for personal and blue for business-is another easy way to quickly tabulate expenses. It is also very important to retain sales drafts or credit card purchases. Not only are they valuable in recapping your expenditures, the IRS expects ta~payers to make them available during an audit. Some banks have recently inaugurated a new type of card, one of which is the Visa Banking Card. Merchandise purchased on this card is paid for directly out of a You've Achieved a Measure of Success. Let Us Keep the Momentum Going. James McClelland Financial Consultant Since most credit card companies and retailers request immediate notification if a card is lost, it is the responsibility of the cardholder to know exactly what cards she has and call the issuer at the first opportunity. A very convenient method of keeping track of credit cards is to lay them out on a sheet and take a picture of them with a copy machine. Keep this information both at home and at the office, and update it periodically if you add or subtract charge cards. Credit card counterfeiting amounted to around $40 million last year, so even if you haven't lost a card, check your monthly statement carefully to ensure that you can account for each item listed. If you should find entries that you cannot identify or for which you have no receipt, contact your issuer right away and ask them to research that item for you. You could be particularly vulnerable if you have traveled out of the state and used your card. According to a recent article, the major areas of the country for counterfeiting are Florida, New York and California, particularly around Los Angeles. In light of this, it might be advisable to take only the necessary cards when traveling and leave the rest at home in a safe place. Dodie Williams is a former banker who is cunently the director of advertising and public relations for the Utah State Division of Economic and Industrial Development. Now you can do your HandiBanking nationwide! .. HandiOOm The Flagship of the Financial World FOSTER & MARSHALL/ AMERICAN EXPRESS MEMRERS NEW YORK STOCK EXCHANGE 34 E. FIRST SOUTH ST., SALT LAKE CITY, UTAH 84147 363-6500/TOLL FREE [phone] Facials for all skin types. Pedicures, manicures, makeup, brow arching, eyelash dyes, individual lashes, waxings, electrolysis and massage. Come in and let us Evening appointments available. checking account and itemized separately on the monthly statement. The advantage is that consumers can literally carry their checkbooks on one card, and it is readily accepted out of town and in places where a personal check might not be accepted. You must remember, however, to enter purchases made with this card in your register as credit card checks like regular· checks can bounce: Newer still are the Gold Mastercard, which will be introduced to the Salt Lake market by Tracy Collins Bank and Trust during the month of August, and the Premium Visacard, which is a recent addition to the cards marketed by both First Security Bank and Valley Bank and Trust. These are the ulitmate in charge cards and have a minimum credit line of $5,000. The annual cost is around $35, and there is sometimes an additional charge for the second card, but the advantages make that a bargain. For instance, there are higher floor limits before an approval number has to be obtained--up to $500 in hotels and car rentals. Also, the cardholders can get cash advances up to $250 in hotels and motels, and that makes it valuable for the frequent traveler. The main requisite for acquisition of these cards is a good credit rating, and most require an annual financial statement. Perhaps the most familiar of all cards is the department store charge card. Some of the major retailers have their own cards and do not accept national credit cards such as Visa or Mastercard. This policy thickens the billfold and adds to the confusion if the cards are lost or stolen. pamper you. 1614&ut 1300So«dSLt ~ SKS-2004 ~ Get cash at over 2,000 locations across the USA wherever you see this symbol. Your present First Security VISA credit, VISA banking or HandiBank card now provides access to thousands of Automated Teller Machines (ATMs), which display the Plus System® symbol. If you don't have a HandiBank access card and PIN (Personal Identification Number), apply for yours now at the new account desk. Your money is always at your fingertips nationwide with HandiBank/Plus System. ~~ First !iecurity Banks Member FDIC First Security Bank of Utah, N.A. • First Security Bank of Idaho, N.A. First Security Bank of Rock Springs • First Security State Bank -- KAREN MAGNUSON has been named Bureau Manager/Utah State News . ,.__ Editor for the United Press International (UPI) office in Salt Lake. Magnuson's position involves both administrative and editorial functions including publisher, editor,in,chief, managing editor and city news editor. UPI supplies news coverage to both print and broadcast media daily on a national and local level including news stories, human interest stories, weather and sports. Magnuson is in charge of five news reporters at the UPI office and previously worked as the State Capitol Bureau Manager in Springfield, Illinois. .& DENISE M. TAFT has been appointed clinical staff coordinator at Phoenix Institute. She will provide therapy as a member of the clinical team and coordinate clinical activities with other Institute operations. Taft is a 1981 graduate of the University of Utah with a master's degree in Clinical Social Work. She has worked for the Department of Social Services as a Permanency Plan.ping Specialist and Administrative Program Developer. She is currently providing individual, couple and family therapy at the Family Counseling Center and Phoenix Institute. RONDA NIELSON and SHIRLEY COLLINS have opened a new company called Lotus, located at 904 East 700 South in Salt Lake City. Lotus specializes in gathering the oils, watercolors, acrylics, stained glass and sculpture of Utah artists and offering it for sale to Utah corporations. MONIA DE LA BERN, the president of Eimco Credit Union has been elected-to the Board of Directors of Utah Credit Union Guarantee Corporation. She also received the Associate Award and the Fellow Award in credit from the National Institute of Credit, awards given to members who have completed courses in credit managment and educational advancement. BONNIE CHAVEZ has ope~ed Red Rose Furniture Cleaning company and will ' specialize in quality cleaning in the Salt Lake Valley north to Centerville and in Park City. She will schedule cleaning for the conveni~nce of working women, and is a partner in two other cleaning companies, DCF and Millionaire Enterprises.' The Salt Lake Chapter.of the Association of Professional Mortgage Women elected officers recently: KATHY STEVENS, President; LINDA COW ART, First Vice President; DEBBIE OGDEN, Second Vice President; VICKI SCHNEIDER, Third Vice President; MARGE HUMMEL, Recording Secretary; TONI BONINO, Corresponding Secretary; MARIA VESCIO, Treasurer. MARIA J. BSUMEK has been named director of a new division of Spafford Paper Recycling, Data Destruction of Utah, where she will be in charge of destroying confidential documents of paper, microfilm and microfiche. Bsumek will be responsible for buying equipment, marketing new business, and hiring personnel, as well as overseeing the operation. She previously worked as an engineer for Kennecott Copper Corporation. .& MARJORIE CARSTENSEN has been appointed Media Director at Harris and Love, Incorporated, Salt Lake's second oldest advertising agency. She will be responsible for coordinating the agency's media planning and buying in local, regional and national markets. The agency serves a variety of regional and national accounts and maintains offices in Utah and New Mexico. She will be in charge of one of the largest media departments in the Mountain West. Carstensen joined Harris and Love in 1982 as a media buyer. She was previously vice president/media director of Ross Jurney and Associates. Four women have founded the Salt Lake Institute for Learning which has been incorporated in the State of Utah as a non, profit corporation with the primary purpose of establishing and maintaining educational programs to improve the quality of eduation for children. BARBARA ROMNEY GALLER, CATHERINE THOMPSON,JOAN WASHINGTON NABORS, and MARILYN HOCKETT are educators who have background and experience in teaching both children and adults, curriculum design and implementation, program design and implementation, human growth and development, and research techniques. They will use three main areas to improve quality education: teacher,education programs, a children's school and competency based training programs. NANCY YVONNE MARTIN has been promoted to Manager of Integration and Evaluation at the Medlab Company, a division of Control Data in Salt Lake City Martin has worked at Medlab for five years, most recently as quality assurance project leader in the software product delivery department. She has installed hospital laboratory computer systems, supported installed systems from Salt Lake City, designed and tested new products and performed quality assurance functions as a senior quality assurance analyst. Martin is a graduate of UCLA and St. Joseph's School of Medical Technology and worked as a medical technologist for several years before joining Medlab as a medical applications analyst. ALICIA DAVIS was named Director of Public Relations for Hal Gardiner and Associates, the public relations firm of Gardiner Advertising Agency where she will be overseeing the activities of the public relations department. Davis worked as publicity director for the Utah Travel Council in the division of travel devrlopment for the past four years, and before that served as public relations coordinator for Ririe, Woodbury Dance Company. M. LUSA FAGERLUND, ~ffective October 1, 1983, will be the Utah State Archivist. She is currently completing a master of arts in history at Portland State University. Her duties as state archivist will include administering the record managment programs at the division of state archives. She is also responsible for archives to the executive, legislative, and judicial branches of state government, the preservation of local government and special district records and the bi,monthly publication of the adminstrative rules for the executive branch of Utah state government called the Bulletin (much like the Federal Register). She will also be a member of the state records committee which determines policy about the retention, access and privacy of public records. Fagerlund is a certified records manager and an adjunct professor at Portland State University. She has been the Portland city archivist since 1977. We have openings for closers. SHARON PEACOCK has been appointed Second District Juvenile Court Judge and at 29, is the youngest judge to serve in the Utah Judicial System. Peacockpreviously worked as assistant attorney general for five years where she helped set up the juvenile justice system and acted as counsel for various.social service agencies. She graduated from Brigham Young University and obtained her law degree at the University of Utah in 1978. CATHRYN COLLIS has been named Acting Director of the Division of Purchasing for the State of Utah. She will be in charge of all purchasing functions of the state, buying everything from paper clips to motor pool cars, and will supervise the 11 employees of the purchasing department. Collis will also work with the purchasing personnel coordinators for all agencies of state government. For the past three years she served as the administrative officer for the Department of Administrative Services. JOANN JACOBSEN-WELLS has been appointed press secretary for Congressman Dan Marriott in ·W ashington D.C. She has been a reporter for the Salt Lake Tribune for eight and a half years and has served as medical editor for the past 15 months, winning awards from Sigma Delta Chi for feature and medical writing. From 1975,81 she was executive director of the Utah Society to Prevent Blindness and is currently vice president of programs of the National Society to Prevent Blindness Utah Affiliate. She is co,author of the biography of Robert H. Hinckley, the founder of ABC television. If you have sales ability, put it to work at ERA~The combination of . your talent and our complete training program is all you need to become a successful, highly paid ERA Real Estate Specialist. ERA training begins with a 40 hour course that covers everything from real estate law to closing techniques. And continues with regular, supplementary seminars and classes on topics like creative finance. Plus you'll learn about all of the innovative programs that ERA has to offer. Programs that provide advice and services to buyers and sellers. When you have solid benefits to offer and the best training in the business to back them up, odds are you'll be a success. If you're interested in becoming ' an ERA Real Estate Specialist call us today. We'll help make you more than just a good real estate agent HARRIET HOOPES. C.R.S. President - Broker S.L Board of REAL TORS~• 1982 REALTOR~' of the Year ERA~ - VISTA, REALT0?.5-~' 9394 South Redwood Rel. P.O. Box 358 \Vest Jordan, Utah 840B4 566-2493 ERA® - VISTA, REALTORS® NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 19 - . 20 NETWORK, AUGUST 1983 by Jerry Stanger At the back of my closet, underneath mismatched shoes and musty clothing, stands an oak chest. Behind the chest lies a trunk. And within the trunk sits a size 8 Adidas shof; box. The shoe box contains many items that are now~ for the most part, forgotten; with the exception of a 3"x5" black imitation leather notebook. It is my first and last diary. The year" 1976" is printed on the inside cover. It is the year I turned sixteen years old, recorded day by day, in pencil and in ball point pen, representing my link to the past and my hope for the future. I suppose there were millions of teenage girls who kept diaries, but I would guess the number of boys who did were few. I know it was a secret I kept to myself. What happened was an English teacher advised the class that the best way to discipline oneself to learn better writing and communication skills was to write down brief, precise accounts of each day, whether one felt like writing or not. So for the year 1976, I did it. I wrote late at night, just before bed. The street light outside my window reflected the movement of my hand, as my eyes squinted at the pages and my pen scribbled down the day's events. I did it for just that one year. And now, when memories of time escape me, I have 1976 any time I want it. The notations are nothing but abbreviations of a.day's events. They are recorded concerns that are now long forgotten, but at the time of writing so important they needed little explanation: 01D OK IN ENG. - W~O KNO.WS IN ESPANOL -HOP£ PAULA ASKS ME TO THE GIRLS' DANCE-PAVE WANTS ME TO TAKE our S.L.A.-'IUK-WH'{ DOESN'T HE ASK HER OUT-WE'RE DOUBLING THIS WEEKEND-HOPE HE ·1s NOT A NERD. GOT 75 ON HEALTH PA.PER-NOT SO HOT-FOOTBALL PRACTICE SUCKS-WH~ DO I PLA'{SCOTT AND COURT HATE IT TOO-WE ARE DUMB-BUT IT GETS US DATES ... And that's what Thursday, Sept. 16, 1976 was like in my life. One value of the -1976-Remember your sixteenth year? Leafing through an old diary helps one young man recall the mixed pleasure and pain of that adolescent time. book was when my friends would mention a day that an event happened, I would know they were wrong; l had it recorded in my little black book. But, of course, I never said anything. To admit l was keeping a diary w'ould be thought of as queer. So when my friends from those years like to joke about the time we almost were thrown in jail, as if it were a prank, my diary tells the story a little closer to the truth: my priorities it was lost between stealing vodka and getting drunk. It is not the way one would choose to remember the time, but apparently that was reality. Reality began to play an important role in my writings. With the combination of naivete and sophistication, confusion began to play its part in my life. We were all virgins that year; or at least I thought we were. But, on December 15, 1976, I found out Doug and Jackie had done "it." BRETT, KURT, STEVE AND I WERE ALMOST CAUGHT IN THE ACT-I THINK THE'{ WOULD HAVE THROWN US IN JAIL-I TOOK THE CARPICKED UP THE GU'{S-WENT ON A MAILBOX BEATING EXCURSIONBEAT A FEW TO THE GROUND-ON THIRD ONE COPS PULLED UP AS WERE WACKING IT INTO PIECESTOOK OFF RUNNING-BRETT FROZEALMOST WET HIS PANTS-HE FINALL'{ RAN-SAT IN THE BUSHES FOR AN HOUR-SCARED-Fl NALL'I THE COPS LEFT-WENT BACK TO CAR-DROVE TO GIRLS HOUSE. DOUG 010 THE BIG IT" -CAN'T BELIEVE JACKIE LET HIM-I DIDN'T THINK WE WERE SUPPOSED TO DO 11 IT"-WHAT NOW- l'M CONFUSED-I GUESS PEOPLE REALL'I DO 11 IT"-POUG SAID IT WAS NO BIG DEAL-WONDER WHAT JACKIE THINKS-OH WELL-GOING OUT WITH PAULA-WONDER IF WE WILL DO "IT"-GOT TO GET THIS OFF M'1' MIND ... There it is. Early in the evening we were almost picked up by the police. By the end of the night we were trying to romance the girls. We were invincible; life was going on and the fear of being caught was just a passing notion. Nov. 15: UP AT NOON-TOOK MOM TO STORE-WENT DOWNTOWN WITH BRETT-MET NICE GIRLS 3765027-PART'I AT NIGHT-STOLE I PINT OF VODKA FROM BARREPLACED IT WITH WATER-ALWA'{S THINKING-UNCLE CHARLIE IN HOSPITAL-WENT TO PART'ICHUGGED RUM-BLEW CHUNKSNEVER DRINK AGAIN. "Uncle Char lie in hospital." My favorite uncle lying in the hospital. And in II This day was to be contusing to me for a long time, but it passed. My friends and I were growing up; not too fast, just a little at a time. It feels funny admitting how scared and confused I was, but there seems to be no other way to express the meaning this book has to me. When you are sixteen you are too new at things to edit yourself; you write things as they happened. I feel that as I begin to reach "adulthood" it is hard to keep such a journal. As I grow older I already find myself censoring the ideas and thoughts that, as a young man, were spontaneous. In the diary, if something bad happened in my life, I could write, "And the all-time loser loses again, "and I would mean it. The next day I would write of spending time with Paula and there would not be a hint of despair. The decision that spring of running track or participating in the school playit doesn't sound so bad now, but the diary tells what this decision meant to me: ... COACH JONES SA'IS CHOOSE BETWEEN TRACK OR DRAMA-I WANT SO BAD TO DO BOTH-I PRA'I THAT I CAN-WHAT WILL M'I FRIENDS SA'I-WITHOUT TRACK THE'{ MA'{ HATE ME-PLEASE GOD HELP ME ... "Without track they may hate me," sounds so desperate-that feeling of not knowing the answer to turning points in life. How many times have I been confronted with this in school and in my personal life? Fear of making the wrong decision and being rejected for my choice. But it is an emotion that I can never express when l 'm supposed to be mature and responsible. Now I swallow hard and put on a good face for the world and let my insides churn. And I lie, telling everyone that things are just great, while all the time, crying, "Please God help . .. " Maybe that's what the book gives me above all else-I see the uncensored emotions of fear, joy, happiness and despair, that as an adult I have to keep deep inside. But when I was sixteen, writing for an audience that, at the time, I was sure would never be anyone but myself, the day's thoughts were there in easy sight; I will never see them more closely. Those years are not that far away. And I know they are there, hidden in a dark closet when I need them. Why l should need them is another question, but I can't find the answer to that question hidden anywhere in my diary of 1976. Jerry Stanger is a journalism student a_t the University of Utah. Th. us when you're hungry. BREAKFAST Fluffy Three Egg Omelettes Hearty 12-Grain Pancakes Ranch Style French Toast Sausage, Eggs & Home Fries Plus Other Specialties LUNCH Fresh Garden Salads Hot & Cold Sandwiches Quiche of the Day Mexican Dishes And Other Favorites DINNER Fresh Fish of the Day Tender Beef Stroganoff Sweet & Sour Chicken .or Shrimp Old World Lasagne And a Lot More! ALSO Fresh Bakery Goods Natural Fruit Drinks and Yogurt Shakes ~ RESTAQRANT & BAKERY The class and style is comparable to many European models. But at half the price. Come in and test drive the new front-wheel drive TEMPO. Downtown 6th Sout~ & Main 521-3850 Open Seven Days a Week In the Northwest Corner of Trolley Square • 364-8963 VOLUME ONE, NUMBER THREE AUGUST 1983 Contents: Patti Kimball Doctors When You Need Them Page 1 Doctors When y OU Need Them Not since the days when doctors made house calls has medical c,are for children been as accessible as it is now. Nighttime pediatric clinics are changing things for parents and doctors alike. The result is better care for children. Kids Stuff Page 2 Lonnie E. Paulos, M.D. Helping Kids Survive Organized Sports or ''Do I Really Want My Baby To Play F oothall?" Page 3 Gayle Sullivan, Joelle & Spitzer Parent Power Page4 Valerie P. Cohen Childbirth: Fear and Loathing in the elivery Room PageS Donna Graves Home Away From Home: Family Day Care Page 6 by Patty Kimball "Moms are always so glad we're here," says Brenda Jones, secretary and medical assistant at Nightime Pediatrics. "We're open in the ·evenings and on .weekends and have never turned anyone away." "And the convenience!" offers Susan J., mother of Samantha, age three. "l work full time and have little flexibility. Getting Sam to a doctor even for a check,up is difficult. And her problems seem to turn up at night anyw~y." Nightime Pediatrics is the brainchild of pediatrician Dr. Rodney Pollary. Like his colleagues his goal is to offer quality care, but he has varied the traditional hours that care is available. He begins when most other doctors are going home. "When a child needs help after five," says Pollary, "the pediatrician basically has three options: meet the child at the office, send and/ or meet the child at a hospital emergency room, or diagnose and prescribe over the phone. None of these options is desirable from the point of view of the doctor or the patient." After-hours office visits and trips to the In operation since January, Pollary's clinic has ten pediatricians who regularly refer to him. One of these doctors is Robert Terashima, who thinks Nightime Pediatrics "is very innovative" and "offers a service to the community." According to Terashima, the clinic is an advantage for patients: they can see a specialist, a pediatrician, and at a reasonable cost. He is also pleased with the way Pollary has set things up so as to discourage "continuous care" patients. Besides charging more, Pollary keeps only minimal records and doesn't do any hospital work. ·"And I like it personally," says T erashima, "because it frees me from worrying about minor problems-earaches, diarrhea, etc.-when I'm needed at the hospital for a really sick child." Pollary, however, had more in mind than helping other doctors attend to the seriously ill. He was looking for more personal time for .himself and other doctors. "Everyone has the right to quality medical care," he says, "but don't doctors have rights too? Aren't we entitled to personal and family lives like everyone else?" As Pollary envisions it, a night time clinic emergency room are inconvenie t and tim -con uming for the f . doctor, and costly for the patient. "And so-called 'telephone medicine' is risky at best," says Pollary. The child could go to any number of 'drop,in' medical centers which are cheaper but "they get what they pay for plus they don't have pediatricians on duty." According to Pollary, efficient quality care is not always available after,hours. "And in the end, it's the child who suffers." improving their lifestyles, while maintaining the quality of care that pediatricians want for their patients and at a reasonable cost. At the same time, it has given him more defined working hours as well. Yet, as a group, pediatricians have not supported Nightime Pediatrics. "We've encountered a lot of resistance," says Pollary. "PediatriGs is a crowded field these days and doctors are increasingly competitive. I think they're afraid of losing patients." . That fear.may be welUounded. When he started the dinic, Pollary sold his practice and sent his patients to other pediatricians. Many of those have returned. "He's so good with kids," says one mother. "They're dedicated to him." And referral patients may be reluctant to go back to their original pediatrician. As one father remarked, "You must be a good doctor. This is the first time Katie hasn't just screamed." Plus, the clinic is especially attractive to working parents for whom traditional pediatricians are in.:onvenient and even more costly if it means losing a day's pay in order to take a child to the doctor. But it's not just the possibility of losing patients that bothers Dr. Edward Jenkins, a pediatrician who did refer to Pollary but doesn't anymore. According to Jenkins, a service such as Pollary's leads to overutilization of medical resources. "l have nothing but the highest regard for Rod as a person and a doctor," he says. "But frankly, he is seeing kids that don't need to be seen." Jenkins estimates that more than 95 percent of after,hours calls are for problems that can wait until the morning. "And for the five percent that can't we want to see them." 11 1 don't really have an answer for that," responds Pollary. "The burden of responsibility is on me. But I do try to see only those who need to be seen." He says he also describes the optionsto parents and then lets them decide whether to come in or not. "Many parents are seeking reassurance that everything is going to be okay through the night, and this reassurance can be worth a trip to the clinic." What usually happens, according to Pollary, is that parents, who definitely want to see their pediatrician but can't because he's not available, or they didn't want to bother him or her in the first place, will take their child to an emergency room. "That's not efficient medical care. Emergency rooms are tremendously expensive to operate and they are designed to handle the critically ill patient. They should not be prevailed upon to see routine outpatient pediatrics." Jenkins concurs that emergency rooms are overused but not because doctors aren't available. "The reason is third party payments," he says. According to Jenkins, insurance companies will usually pay for emergency room visits whereas office visits are not covered. Continued on Page 7 Agi Plenk Entry or Re-entry: Helping Kids Make a Safe Landing in School Page 7 Al Church · Clearasil and Corsag~s: Teens on the Town Page 8 Dr. Pollary and Samantha: finding new ways to give patients better service. "Kids need a better alternative!" he says. The idea behind Nightime Pediatrics is to be 'on,call' for other pediatricians when they cannot or don't want to be available. The clinic is open weekday evenings from six to midnight, Saturday noon to 9 p.m. and Sunday from 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. Pollary treats problems that can't wait until regular office hours-minor illnesses, accidents, cuts, burns, etc.-but not those which are so serious as to be life-threatening. "Those definitely belong in an emergency room," he says. Most of Pollary's patients are referrals from other doctors. And after treatment at Nightime Pediatrics, they're sent back to thfir originial pediatrician for follow,up care. Pollary's fee is less than an emergency room or after-hours office visit would be but more than a routine daytime office visit. The higher nightime fee is one way he encourages patients to return to their original pediatricians. pediatricians from after-hour demands, si ificant\y 2 FAMILY CONNECTIONS, AUGUST 1983 POWERLEARNING FOR THOSE NEEDING IMPROVEMENT IN READING third grade through adults Supermemmy makes it possible to learn two to ten times faster EACH PERSON'S POTENTIAL IS LIMITLESS YWCA 322 East 300 South, SLC, 355-2804 -..fall session begins September 19: Diaper Gym and Swim, Swimming for all ages including competitive stroke development and diving, Dance; tap, ballet, jazz for various ages, Gymnastics for ages 3 to 6. For infants; Creative Play with parents, 12 to 36 months, Infant Stimulation 1 month to 1 year olds with parents. Preschool at West Valley and downtown locations, 3,4 year olds, begins first week in September, $35-$45. Call for more information and registration. YWCA membership required. Play Center always open for unlicensed child care. READING SKILLS INSTITUTE • DR CONNIE BAGLEY-KRAUSE 561-7144 YMCA 737 East 200 South, SLC, 533-YMCA Swimming lessons, 5 weeks, $25, for all ages 3 months to adult. Kids Karate, 12 weeks, $40, for 6 to 18 years old. All classes begin th_e first week in September. M. LEE SUITOR t3 A SALT LAKE BOYS AND GIRLS CLUB 968 East Sugarmont Drive (2235 South), SLC, 484-0841 1\1 t\.1 U l\1us Outdoor·soccer for girls and boys ages 5 to 12. Begins first week of September, 6 weeks, $8. Indoor Soccer and basketball coming in November. Instruction in Piano Organ Theory HANSEN PLANETARIUM 15 South State, SLC, • 535-7029 ~32-3084 UTAH MUSEUM OF NATURAL HISTORY Univeristy of Utah campus, SLC, 581-6927 LB4 M S\reet for information. Salt Lake City SOUTH VALLEY YMCA 800 East 100 North #A, Sandy, 255-YMCA Gymnastics for 7 and under, $20, Tuesday and Thursday, 9:30 a.m. to ro:30 a.m., ages 8 to 12, Tuesday and Thursday ro:45 a.m. to 1 r:45 a.m. Karate ages 6 to adult, Tuesday and Thursday evenings from 7 to 8:30 p.rp.. Tennis lessons next session August 8 to 19, ages 8 to adult, $15. Youth Flag Football program for girls and boys ages 8 to 14. Call the last week in August for registration. SELF ESTEEM CENTER 131 7 East 6th South, SLC, 486-2715 CAMPFIRE SUMMER CAMPS 973-6777 Ground Council Fire September 3, all ages. Pioneer Trail State Park Ampitheatre. THE CHILDREN'S CENTER 1855 Medical Circle, SLC, 582,5534 Positive Group Experience for Young Children workshop Saturday September 10 from 9 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. Workshop by Lynn Koshland, B.S. and Agnes Plenk, Ph.D., $3.00, students$2.00, friends,no charge. Call to register. New classes starting at the museum beginning August 1. Call bd 7t, Sourh Highland Orn,e House tours daily except Sunday, between 9 a.m. and 4 p.m. Chores tour daily, except Sunday, at 5:30 p.m. Beginning September 1 Chores tour at 4:30 p.m. Hayrides 11 a.m. and 2 p.m . daily, except Sunday. Labor Day Breakfast September 1, 6 a.m. to 2 p.m. Halloween Party October 29. Catered parties may be scheduled though August. Fall schedule starts September 1. Call for changes. Help your children become more responsible for their own self-esteem. Six week classes for ages 4 to 12. Saturdays through August 13, 11 a.m., Star Magic and science demonstration, $1.25-adults, 75¢-children. Children's Space Library, open 9 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. and 7 to 9 p.m., Monday through Saturday. Children's Festival: star shows, clowns, puppet shows, and science demonstrations, begins August 13, 10:30 a.m. each Saturday through September 3. Children's Science Story Time, call for August schedule. tor Adults and Ct,ildren WHEELER FARM 6301 South 900 East, SLC, 262-9907 Space will be awilable in this calendar for o ~ o n s offering ewents for children. For more infonnation call Jeanne Shaw, S32-609S. Areas outside Salt Lake County are encouragecl to call. Service Since 1912 FALL CLASSES FOR KIDS at ·the YWCA INFANTS AND PARENTS Diaper Gym-Swim Infant Stimulation 902 East 900 South Salt Lake City, Utah 84105 355-2869 Licensed Member of Professional Compounding Centers of America *r Utah's PMS Pharmacy A Private Non-Profit United Woy Agency 521-8656 566-5606 SALT LAKE MIDVALE '2 98-5100. 375-6736 BOUNTIFUL PROVO txpecting a baby? Enjoy full participation and a more complete understanding of your birthing experience. t:nroll in your choice of these classes: • Lamaze childbirth • Early pregnancy • Bradley husband-coached • Breastfeeding for preparation mothers working natural childbirth • Prenatal exercise • New mothers' outside the home • Parenting skills • Infant stimulation classes support group •Sibling preparation •Childbirth refresher course •Breastfeeding for new baby Birth w Familyemta- A fully licensed birth center. for more infonnation call: 261·5585 291 West~ SouOt, Salt Lake City, Utah 84107 Comprehensive prenatal care • Personalized birthing • Comfortable women's health care From Sall Lake City lake 1-IO ..stbound to Park City exll Slide localed al Paltt City Ski Resort. Open late May through October. Call 521-6735. noon-10:00 p.m. Monday-Friday Saturdays-Sundays-Holidays 10:00 a.m.-10:00 p.m. Preschoolers YWCA Preschools (Downtown & West Valley locations) Ballet & Tap Creative Dance Gymnastics Creative Play (with parent) School Age Children Swimming Ballet, Jazz, Tap Call the YWCA 355-2804 For further infomration FAMILY CONNECTIONS, AUGUST 1983 3 Helping Children Survive Organized Sports or----- uno I really want my baby to play football?" Is competition healthy or unhealthy? Do parents who encourage their children to participate in contact sports, run the risk of seeing these young athletes seriously injured? Careful supervision is the key to providing your child with positive sports experiences. by Lonnie E. Paulos, M.D. There eventually comes a time in every parent's life when they must decide if they are going to allow their "baby" to risk life and limb playing organized sports with the "rest of the kids." Being a parent and former "kid", I've found my ambivalence about this decision growing stronger each year and with each addition to my family. Complicating matters is the fact that I am a physician who specializes in sports injuries and every day must treat the battered contestants from last night's little league game. A week has hardly gone by that I haven't been asked by a parent if I recommended that their injured child continue to play sports. Usually they have read conflicting articles about how good or how bad sports are for children and were oroughly confused. In an effort to answer these questions by concerned parents, as well as to appease my own conscience (and wife) for allowing, no, encouraging my children to play sports, I undertook the assignment of getting the facts about sports injuries in children. In the next few paragraphs I will summarize my findings and try to explain the logic behind my decision to allow my children to participate in organized sports. It appears logical that if one is going to make an informed decision he must first answer several very important questions. First, what are the major objections to children participating in organized sports? Second, how often do injuries occur and how serious are these injuries? And finally, can these injuries be prevented? Most of those who oppose organized sports for children, do so on the basis of rive objections. First, there is an increased likelihood ·of injury to an underdeveloped musculoskeletal system. Second, the possibility of permanent b~ne or joint deformity can result from injury to one of the growth centers in the body. Third, children may expose themselves to more trauma because of immature judgement. Fourth, improper coaching and supervision can lead to injuries or improper development, and fifth, psychological trauma can occur from over-zealous parents and coaches. At this point it is only fair to remind the reader that this physician-author (and "ex-jock") had already made a decision to let his children participate in sports prior to embarking on this research project. Therefore, faced with five convincing objections as outlined above I felt it my duty to thoroughly refute and dismantle them to the best of my ability. Obviously these objections couldn't be right, after all, look how good I had turned out! After days of hard work and diligent research concerning these five objections I finally concluded (in frustration) that they were all true. What I discovered was that there is no question some activities performed over an extended period of time can lead to injury in the growing skeleton. For instance, within the past year it has been reported in a major medical meeting that an increased incidence of low back stress fractures ( similar to a wire breaking after bending it back and forth) can occur in children participating in gymnastics. Likewise, permanent limb angulation has also been reported in children who have suffered fractures to one of the growth centers in the knee during participation in little league football. Obviously, we shouldn't let our children participate in gymnastics or football, right? Wrong! Our decision can't be made on a few reported cases but must be made based on the numbers. Fifteen million injuries occur to children each year. Only four percent of these occur from sports, and most of these CHILDCARE Salt Lake Boys & Girls Club, Inc. 968 E. SUGARMONT DRIVE (2225 South) in Fairmont Park 484-0841 "sports injuries" occurred in unsupervised neighborhood games. Of all sports injuries only six percent were involving growth centers, and the large majority of these healed normally. Only two percent of little league football players ever missed a game or practice because of injury and fifty percent of these children returned to complete their season. So yes, the first two objections can be true, but in reality your child is at more risk riding in a car on his way to the music lesson. In summary, this author believes that competitive, organized sports for the preadolescent is a positive force in their development that must not be restricted by unfounded fears of injury. Although serious injuries can and do occur, they · occur very rarely and less if the following conditions are present: 1. There is a pre-participation physkal examination. 2. Athletic teams are grouped according to physical maturation, not just by age. !V) LU 0.. ····' ~ LU !LU z z :,,..J The final three objections are intuitively true, but unlike the first two, these final three can all be minimized by proper supervision and selection of coaches, and de-emphasis of winning. In the study of injuries in little league football players, it was discovered that when injuries did occur, they occurred early in the season, during games, an.cl in starting players . . Obviously, one can minimize these injuries by properly conditioning the children and liberally substituting all team members to decrease their "time at risk." Over~zealous and uninformed coaches can, and must be eliminated from little league sports. Being interested and having a child on the team are not sufficient credentials to be a coach. Parent-coaches must be trained and supervised. There are a number of other ways that the child in sports can be protP.cted. For example, a pre-participation physical examination looking for developmental problems is mandatory. Many medical problems once thought to disqualify a child from sports can now be properly controlled, allowing the child to participate normally. Asthma, epilepsy, diabetes and many other diseases if detected early, before sports participation, can be controlled without restricting the child or causing impairment. 3. There is proper coaching of fundamentals, supervised by trained coaches and educators. 4. Good protective equipment, is available and has been properly fit. 5. Physical conditioning rather than winning. 6. Well-maintained playing fields and facilities are used. 7. De-escalation of" all star" and tournament type games, and an escalation of mandatory playing time for all team members is practiced. To restrict a child from playing sports because of fear of injury is wrong, but to allow a _c hild to play sports without first insuring his safety is unforgiveable. When parents decide to allow their child to participate in organized sports they also assume the responsibility of that child's safety. With appropriate supervision, children benefit when they participate in competitive organized sports. Lonnie E. Paulos, M .D., is an assistant clinical professor in the department of orthopedic surgery at the University of Utah and a writer who has published many articles on sports medicine. PROGRAM INCLUDES (Grades Kindergarten Through Sixth) • Arts & Crafts • Athletics • Small Groups CftildTert:s CoTrt_eT ~~,-, .·• • Lunch & Snacks • Swimming • Special Events Preschool c& Child Car,e Center Transportation to select schools and after school pick-up. HOURS 6:30 A.M. - 6:00 P.M. "All Athletic Tearn Sports, plus uniforms, included at no extra' cost" sALTLAc:~:~y'~iG,RLs • State Licensed • 0 ~ ~ AGENCY OF UNITED WAY 35134 Hakighcl~nd UDrivhe84106 Sa t L e 1ty, ta . Owner/Director Kathy Whyte "We Care About You and Your Children" • Ages: 6 months-12 years • Hours: 6:30 a.m.-6:15 p.m. Monday-Friday • Transportation to and from William Penn, Roosevelt and Libby • Hot Lunch & Snacks Edwards Public • Music, Arts & Crafts School • Summer Day Ca~p • New owner and qualified staff • State Licensed • Planned Pre-school with extended all day care • Free Registration 1lJ[?' Monthly Rates: Infants: $245.00 2 Years: $160.00 3-5 Years: $150.00 Kindergarten: $130.00 After School: $1 .25/hour Title XX children accepted. Come See Our New Center For more information call: 486-6363 If no answer: 968-3680 ... 4 FAMILY CONNECTIONS, AUGUST 1983 Parent Power It is undoubtedly the most important and most difficult job of our lives, and our skill is supposed to come naturally. Parents are made not born and parenting classes provide the information and understanding that allows them to do their best. by Gayle Sullivan and Joelle Spitzer "I dumped a bucket of water on our three-year-old," an embarassed father reveals to the parenting class. "And it worked!" adds the mother. "Our boy knew he had done wrong. But how do we discipline him next time? What do we use to make a lasting impression?" "Being a good parent is the hardest of human tasks," says Gayle Sullivan, Social Worker and Parenting instructor at the Children's Center. "The responsibility to teach, nurture and enrich a child's life can be overwhelming." This realization plus the awareness that good parents are not born, but taught, has led increasing numbers of mothers, fathers and even grandparents to classes which teach child-rearing principles and techniques. Emphasis in parenting classes differs. Some focus on methods of family organization and problem solving, while others concentrate on communication techniques and outlining developmental stages. But 'regardless of emphasis, the goal of all parenting classes is to help parents living in an increasingly insecure environment, guide their children to secure, respon~ible adulthood. The Children's Center class is called "Enjoying your Children: The Basics." "The premise," says Gayle Sullivan, "is that if we understand a child's temperament, behavior and needs at each stage of development, we won't be so anxious about being parents. We can even enjoy it!" She claims that discipline can become a relatively positive experience and believes that parents can't learn these skills too soon. Nancy Anderson and Joyce Sheya are known as The Parent Training Specialists and have been giving classes in the southern part of the valley for twelve years. They too feel that the early years are· the most important in parent/child interaction and stress that good communication habits formed during the early years will help avoid many teenage problems later. "Kids need to be prepared for adolescence when they are ten," says Anderson. "An early understanding of what hormonal changes they can expect and how these changes effect them, their feelings, and behavior can forestall many difficulties." Since behavior is an expression of feelings, Sullivan encourages parents to ask themselves what their children are feeling at the moment negative behavior occurs. "Understanding and acknowledging the child's feelings- anger, frustration, fear, hopelessness or rejection-helps dissipate the feelings of both parent and child and can help them formulate solutions together.'' and understood lose their destructive power. Because feelings and behavior are so inter-related, most classes explore ways in which fa~ilies can promote self-esteem. "Our classes stress democratic living as a means of teaching self respect," says Anderson. "While everyone isn't equal in age or experience, everyone, from the youngest on up, can be equal in human value, dignity and self worth," adds Sheya. According to Sullivan, parents enhance or diminish the self-esteem of their . children every day, whether they think about it or not. Parental views of a child's rights and opinions are communicated by the limits set on. behavior, by the way they listen to children's conversations, and by the seriousness with which they treat them. A book which deals dearly with the subject is Your Child's SelfEsteem, by Dorothy Briggs. Some of her suggestions include: • Be trustworthy. Provide a you-cancount-on-me environment w.ith honesty, predictable routines, and preparation for changes. • Be non-judgemental. Parents can communicate affection, pride, worry or anger while avoiding the laying of blame or the making of verbal attacks. • Talk about the positives. Look for the child's strengths and draw the child's attention to them. . • Qive quality time. Give your child periods of time when your attention is completely focused upon him and his interests. The message to the child is clear: he/she is important enough to spend time with. • Communicate effectively. Engage in purposeful conversation. Avoid pointless lecturing, unproductive labeling, demeaning comparisons with other children, sarcasm and idle threats, all o(which increase the distance between parent and child. Parents who take steps to enhance their emotional needs, limit serious dis~ipline problems. Further, their own self-esteem increases as their confidence grows and discipline becomes a. means of teaching appropriate behavior rather than a form of punishment. Good parenting classes emphasize showing by doing-parental modeling of acceptable behavior and social skills. Tney teach parents to help children make responsible decisions by pursuing the logical consequences of misconduct. For those times when parents must do more, parent training classes offer disciplinary measures that maintain a child's self-esteem and circumvent pointless power struggles. One such method, suggests Sullivan, is redirection. The parent gives a child the limit or rule for behavior, talks about feelings that motivated the behavior and suggests alternatives to solve the problem. Sullivan also recommends the time-out technique-physically removing the child to a quiet place for a set period of time, informing the child of the behavior for which he/she is being removed and describing the expected behavior. "Discipline in particular and parenting in general is shaped by the goals we have for our children," says Sullivan. "I hope that my children will like themselves, and learn to express their positive feelings easily. I also hope that they will learn to express negative feelings sufficiently to find solutions to their problems.'' Parent training can help reach these goals, but even with training parenting is not at all predictable. There are no fast rules, no tables to be memorized. Rather, it is a skill to practice, evaluate, reform, repractice and, finally, to enjoy. Parenting classes stress that negative feelings that are expressed, acknowledged children's self..:esteem, and who learn to understand their children's behavioral and Joelle Spitzer is the volunteer co-editor of Family Connections. •nll ~ ,~• 8ALT LAKE INSTITUTE FOR LEARNING CHILDREN'S SCHOOL 843 Lincoln St. Salt Lake City, Utah 84102 An independent school for children ages four, five and six. :,:~«- -~=<•::, . :.~~)~II Gayle Sullivan is a clinical social worker at the Children's Center. AFTERSCHOOL RECREATION PROGRAM Recreation and Supervision available afterschool until 6:00 P .M. • Arts & Crafts • Movies • Sports • Games • Swimming • Etc. - Providing opportunities for children to develop Knowledge, Competence and Skills, through an integrated curriculum. - Promotes independent learning - Uses inter age grouping - Involves parents in decision making - Staffed by certified experienced teachers *Barbara Galler- Institute Director *Cathy Thompson- Director Children's School. *Joan Nabors - Teacher Children'S School Scholarships and Extended day available. Applications accepted beginnJng July 1st ·Registration July 15tfl.:Sept. 1s For more information call 801-532~3346 Pick up and transportation •from selected schools is available. For further information and prices call CENTRAL CITY Multi-Purpose Center 535-7137 615 South 300 E.ast FAMILY CONNECTIONS, AUGUST 1983 5 had nutritious snacks. I never did pay my $10 for that class. THE FINAL EXAM I was sure I could do it (after all/ my cat couid, and what did she know?). I had run a marathon not long before, was still jogging. I had read all the right books, and had now started in on Dr. Spock . ..J. discovered that although I would be assigned a regular doctor for perioclic examinations I wQuld be "delivered" by whichever doctor at my clinic was "on" when labor co~menced. It was at this point I began to feel my control over my. life was slipping away-that control which "natural childbirth" is supposed to reinforce. The doctor I ended up with was a bouncing, fatherly sort, and I tried to trust him as one would trust Marcus Welby, M.D. He liked to chang1e my sanitation and maidenly modesty, my limbs were clamped. The nurses telephoned church several times, and Welby finally returned. He said I wasn't breathing right (I didn't know how). He said if I didn't push he'd use forceps (I pushed). He said he was going to cut a little. I told him not to, so he cut a lot. He said my placenta looked bad. I wasn't planning to hang it over the Birthing Centers and enlightened doctors have fireplace. provided more and more women with positive birth AFTERMATH Dr. Welby assured me later that I had experiences. Yet, many are caught in the patterns of been a "good" patient. He said I shouldn't the past. Here is the story of one woman whose choices worry that the baby was so small. "l like to were limited to what her small town had to offer. see couples have boys first," he gloated. "They have smaller families." When I couldn't figure that one out, he explained, by Valerie P. Cohen "It's because they don't have to keep, It didn't help to be cursed with friends When I got piegn,ant I was pretty trying." That certainly shut me up. who have babies in four hours, labor to innocent. That is, I knew how I got that Soon after I got home, my episiotomy delivery and are ready to run the hundred, way, but I didn't know how to get tested. I came unsewn. I phoned the clinic and got meter hurdles next day. They all said giving thought they still killed the rabbit-peeing to weep and swear into the tape recorder; it in a bottle· seemed, well, anti,climactic. birth was "wonderful." Interrogated with must have made fascinating listening for the «--::-s pain, they said, "Well, yes, but you The prospect of parenthood was cleaning lady, but a doctor never phoned. intimidating, but first I had to figure out don't care." ~~w could you not care? ., ~. Six months later I had surgical repairs. how to give birth. Surely, I thought I could How much did It hurt? They ~ I hear that obstetrical medicine do it with style and grace if I just improved couldn't say. Certainly our language ~ ~ "1 is more advanced elsewhere. my attitude a bit. At least I lived in is not equipped to express private •.:.,)£4 Classes give so~id i~formation, Southern Utah, where becoming a mother sensations like pain or sex·.;/~ and one can brmg birth was the first socially,acceptable thing I've but I could have used some attendants into the labor and ever done. The local doctors would be comparisons. delivery rooms. But most of us are Surely I could learn by reading nothing if not experienced. My confidence still delivered, as our mothers were, bloomed. I was terrified. technical books instead of novels. (Novels into the authority of the doctors. WHAT I KNEW rot the brain anyway.) The city library had Still, I wond~r, what could I have done Birth was not discussed around the one book on the subject: Childbirth Without differently? What should I have done family dinner table, but as a teenager I read Fear. (Fear? What fear!) It was written two differently? with rapt horror every account of it I could years before I was born. The premise was Would a woman doctor have treated find. that if you knew what to expect, you me as an adult, have had gentler hands? Kristin Lavransdatter, for instance. It wouldn't be afraid, and if you weren't Perhaps I would not have feared she would took Kristin fourteen pages and three days without explanation. afraid, it wouldn't hurt; even I could see desert me if I asked to be treated as an adult. to have her first baby. Her sexy husband this meant if it did hurt, it was all your own Whenever I tried to talk , What I really needed was not a doctor of a was horrified when she lost "every trace of about the birth, he told me not to fault. different sex, but simply a doctor who youth and comeliness," developed eczema worry and changed the subject. He had a I read Bing's book about natural respected me. . and slimy lips, and uttered "inhuman habit of looking at the wall over my headchildbirth twenty,five times (and another I am ashamed I was so ignorant and animal cries." I knew he was afraid to look at my twenty,five during labor.) It seemed to be fearful, yet I wonder how l could have been Sabra in Cimarron had an stomach. He spoke dutifully about my written for child,mothers, b~t I took otberwi e ·n r w litt t r d blood pressure, my fat, my imminent "accouchement" on the frontier, never comfort from its mightily encouraging no one to talk to. Now I am saddened toxemia. His favorite topic was my having been pregnant (as far as I could tell) tone. when my 38 year old cousin who is about advanced age: uy ou girls who have first in the first place. She accomplished the I treasured Arms' Immaculate Deception to have her first child says she is too scared babies so late, you have to expect deed with ease-in a mere two for its cover photograph of a naked, very to talk about it. problems, and you better have the rest of paragraphs-yet the child was utorn from pregnant lady: I had never seen such a thing Why is that? And how can it change? her flesh." your family soon or it'll be too late." (No before. It was a mistake to go beyond the It bothers me that in Utah, where As I grew older, more women writers wonder I had high blood pressure.) cover, to read in gruesome detail how families are so important, the begetting and appeared. They told of the comic horrors My labor started Friday at noon, so I laboring women are routinely mistreated in birthing of children is accomplis_h ed in such of raising children. Most feminists drew Dr. Welby. The contractions came American hospitals. That information dread secrecy. If it is a magical social act, hard and fast, but I didn't dilate. The labor discussed motherhood in sociological terrified me more than had my former our doctors should make us feel special terms, meanwhile vowing they would never room had no windows, and we could watch ignorance; but surely, now that I was while we are doing it, and we should be football on color T .V. I never did know submit their own bodies to such a process. forewarned, I could control myself and my able to talk about it later in mixed (They had probably read the same novels I who played (hat Saturday, but suspected doctor. company. They don't and we don't. I think my team was losing. I could hear Dr. had.) At the other extreme, harlequin . Michael and I dutifully enrolled in the I can help if I discuss my experience romances never progressed beyond the first Welby cheering his team ( the other one) in local childbirth "class." Sometimes it was honestly with other women approaching kiss. No wonder I married eleven years the room next door. He peeked in a couple cancelled; usually it was disorganized; and their first childbirth-if they ask, and that's of times, sporty in a double,knit leisure before I was ready for the birth ordeal. always it relied on the proposition that the problem. Women want to talk about it suit. Still I didn't dilate so he reprimanded WHAT I LEARNED birth is a defilement and a medical crisis. afterwards , in.general terms, and only when me for my poor posture, and I slouched I knew American women had passed The other students, all a decade younger there are no men in the room. So we each beyond the traumas of frontier birth. First home for Saturday night. than we, giggled with .embarrassment. end up having isolated experiences of they got good drugs. Later; they got good Dr. Welby phoned late that eve"ning and (Everyone would know what they had been varying degrees of frustration, and the attitudes-Le. "natural childbirth." I had a manly talk with Michael about doing!) doctors never change. usectioning her." (Webster's: "to cut or wanted firsthand accounts. I might have A pale middle,aged nurse told us that If I had it to do again, maybe I'd take all seperate into parts." I could hardly wait.) overcome family reticences and asked my breaking water in public is humiliating, and the drugs those nice nurses offered. • mother, but I didn't think she would The true joy of "natural childbirth" labor is disgusting. A young dietician told remember much about her well,medicated seems to be you get to be wide awake and us we wouldn't be very pretty. They 1940's deliveries. know what a jerk your physician is. When showed us the delivery room, with its I returned to the hospital Sunday morning, bright lights and grotesque table. They Valerie P. Cohen is a freelance writer who very tired, Dr. Welby was dressed for promised they would be right there with lives in Cedar City, Utah during the winter church. Looking like a banker, he drugs whenever we wanted them (I wanted and is a Park Service ranger at Grand Teton complained as he left that patients like me Rocky Mountain Counseling Center them already). National Park in the summer. • lower a doctor's wages to 50 cents an hour. After every class we practiced breathing Finally dilated, I was rushed willy,nilly for two minutes (nobody said why) and into the delivery room, draped to preserve Childbirth: Fear and Loathing In The Delivery Room 2469 East 7000 South I Suite 204 Salt Lake City. Utah 84121 Telephone [phone] T. Lee Burnham, Ph.D. CREATING A LEARNING CLIMATE "Helping Children Succeed in School" "Teaching Family Members to Cooperate" "Positive Discipline & Behavior Control" "Building Positive Self Esteem" "Teaching Children About Sex" "Teenagers in Successful Families" "Youth Employment in Hawaii" Pia}' is children's work. Toys, games, books are their tools. Learn about Educational materials chosen from all over the world with children's developmental stages considered. ~ DR CONNIE BAGLEY-KRAUSE Hostess a Home or School Demonstration., Have a fund raiser. Attend an open house. [phone] Piano Lessons all leuels Naida Poulin San Francisco Conservatory • of Music graduate 25 Years Experience My Home or Yours 1123 Sunnyside Avenue, SLC 583-4359 & FAMILY CONNECTIONS, AUGUST 1983 Home Away From Home: Family Day Care Especially for the little ones, quality child care in a family setting offers the next best thing to staying at home. Here's how to discover whether the second mother you pick will be all that you want her to be. by Donna Graves "Family day care is the finest kind of day care for pre-schoolers," says Dr. Elliott D. Landau, Professor of Educational Studies at the University of Utah and a family therapist for the Associated Psychiatric Group. By definition, family day care is the care of one to six children (including the provider's own) in a private residence during part or all of the day. Dr. Landau emphasizes that the ratio of one adult to six children is what makes the FDC Centers ideal for pre-school child care. "Of course," he adds, "we are assuming that the child provider is a loving person who has some training in child development and the home meets the safety and equipment requirements of a licensed day care center." Although Landau highly to attend free workshops and to use resources available for increasing the nutritional value of the children's food. According to the National Day Care · Study, there are basically tw0 types of FDC providers: ( 1) older women whose families are raised and who either do not choose to work outside their homes or who do not have the marketable skills to do so; and (2) younger women who do have marketable skills but want to work in their homes because they have young children of their own. LuRae Anderson, the mother of eight grown children, has been an FDC provider in West Valley City for 12 years. She has cared for one little girl since she was nine years old, and the girl even has a pet parakeet that lives with Anderson. Children come and go from Anderson's home in revolving-door fashion depending on their parents' work schedules; the first recommends the concept of Family Day child arrives at 6:30 a.m. and the last one Care Centers, he cautions that the theory is not always put into practice as it should be. "l made an impromtu visit to one Family Day Care Center and the day care provider was 'wat~hing' the children by letting them watch TV." The rules and regulations for a Family Day Care Center as prescribed by the Division of Family Services are designed to protect the health and safety of children. When parents leave their children at an FDC Center, they know that the child care provider has been inspected by the state and will be intermittently monitored. The Division of Family Services takes a continued active interest in the FDC Centers, encouraging child care providers leaves at 10:00 p.m. Despite the constant traffic, Anderson's home has a wellordered, inviting appearance. Although her home is "child-proofed" according to the Division of Family Services' regulations it still looks more like a home than a nursery school. From the shade trees on the lawn to the overstuffed sofa in the living room this FDC Center feels like "grandma's house." Even though FDC licensed centers should insure that certain standards are met, Anderson feels that parents are wise to evaluate the centers themselves. One mother who now leaves her baby with her had visited three different FDC Centers before making a ~hoice. "She chose me," said Anderson, "because I was the only one who said I wouldn't let the older children hold the babies." Anderson enjoys taking care of children, but she doesn't recommend it for mothers with children of their own. "I think it upsets children when they have to share their home and their mother." Louise Hatch, another FDC provider in West Valley City, is the mother of one preschooler. Hatch majored in elementary education at BYU and has been certified as a teacher for 10 years. She has experience with federal reading programs and loves to teach. She does not think that taking care of other people's children in her home has had a negative effect on her child, "In fact," she says. "the reason I chose to be a licensed FDC provider was to give my only child the experience of coping with 'brothers and sisters."' One way that Hatch handles the "attention" problem is to give each child she cares for her / his own special day. On that day, the child in the spotlight is allowed to choose the books that are read and to say the blessing at meal time. Hatch structures activities so that there are daily bike rides and spends time each day teaching sounds, numbers, colors and shapes. FDC Centers allow children the opportunity to experience being individuals with a family atmosphere. They often get the kind of personal attention unavailable in large centers. "When I tend children," says provider Janet Ericson, "I let them imitate me. If I'm sweeping the kitchen, I give them a broom and let them sweep, too." Picking the right provider is the key. Landau recommends that the day care provider be a loving person, a quality that may be difficult to determine. Talk to the provider, find out why she takes in children, observe her as she cares for those already with her, watch your own child's reaction to her. Jackie Sutherland, an FDC provider in Kearns, has a home filled with living things: plant.s, animals, and children. As we talk, the children staying with her bring me strawberries and flowers while her Quaker Parrot sits on the patio table observing the family dogs. Jackie obviously interacts well with the children and the animals, and it seems that she genuinely enjoys caring for them. Explaining how she became an FDC provider, Sutherland says, "I tried to go back to work when my daughter was a preschooler, but I couldn't stand to see her cry when I left her with a ba.bysitter. So, I ~ decided to let all the other mothers go to work, and I'd stay home and watch their children." Sutherland's daughter doesn't cry now and neither do those who come each day to stay with her. Instead, they cry when their parents come to take them home, Sutherland says, "It's better that they cry because they want to stay than because they have to stay." There are 1,685 licensed FDC Centers in Utah. The Division of Family Services has excellent standards for the centers, but licensing doesn't guarantee that the individual day care providers will always adhere to the standards. There are too many FDC Centers for Family Services_to be able to supervise on a regular basis. As one concerned day care provider said, "Parents must still be responsible for checking on the centers themselves. I know of an FDC Center that lost its license because a parent reported that her twoyear-old child was left to wander off by herself and the parent found the child three blocks away from the center. In another incident, an FDC Center lost its license because a parent made an unexpected visit and found that her baby's diaper had not been changed for hours." In selecting an FDC Center, parents would be wise to make more than one visit before enrolling their children. Donna Graves has a secondary certificate, works in the Education Department of the University of Utah, and is a freelance writer. The Salt Lake Child 6 Family Thaapy Clinic Trolley Corners - 515 South 700 East Suit.e 3D Salt Lake City, Utah Tel: [phone] Children's Therapy Groups Adolescent Therapy Groups Parenting Groups Women's Groups Comprehensive Evaluations Individual * Family * Couples Therapy Day and Evening Appointments Robert E. Simpson, Jr. DSW, MPH Brenda Reiss Brennan, RN, MS Beckie Bradshaw, LCSW and Associates 1 A CHILD'S INDEPENDENCE IS TOO BIG A RISK FOR THE SHAKEY BALANCE OF SOME PARENTS. -Hannah Green I Never Promised You A Rose Garden FAMILY CONNECTIONS, AUGUST 1983 Entry or Re-entry: Helping Kids Make a Safe Landing in School by Agnes M. P.enk, Ph.D. Within a few weeks school starts. September first is a significant date for many-relief for working ·parents, return to a schedule for teenagers, a new adventure for your five-year-old, ,and hopefully a challenge for those who teach. For everybody it's a new beginning and there are a few general ideas we can share. Change is scary and even if your kindergartner has been in preschool or a day care center, school is different. The building is large and noisy; there are many doors and long corridors. A whole lot of adults are milling around, and the playground-oh boy! No more sandboxes and no more tricycles, but high monkey bars, tall slippery slides, and most of all, lots of kids. It's even harder in the classroom-they have to sit in the same chair most of the time, hold-up their hands when they want to say something, and most of all, listen. Much depends on the big person in charge-she (and usually it is a she) might be young or old, strict or lenient, creative or boring, but she is very important and needs to be pleased. How can you help your child to adjust? Take him or her to the school building, let them climb on the bars, get oriented to the objects, so that when the time comes, he or she can concentrate on the moving objects, namely, the other children. Be positive about education and the local school; children spend the better part of their lives there, it's easier with a positive attitude on the parents' part. I am sure you won't like it all, but the first five years were not glorious every day, either. Hopefully, your child has already learned to separate from you and you from her or him-if not, there will be trouble. Early morning stomach aches, particularly on Mondays, are a danger signal-be sympathetic, but firm and get them to school. I would avoid asking whether the day was fun, or ~hether they liked it. Instead, zero in on what's happening. Whom are they sitting next to? What sounds did they learn? Does Mrs. Smith have curly or straight hair? What happened at recess? Visit the school and get an idea of the schedule so that your questions make sense. If at all p9ssible, both parents should stop by, particularly if the child lives with only one. The noncustodial parent cannot be Santa Claus only, but needs to share in daily happenings. First grade is different again. All day, lunchrooms, greater demands on cognitive achievement. Please remember individual differences, holding a pencil and staying on a line is hard for some children. Small motor development comes after mastery of large motor skills, swimming ·might do wonders for handwriting! Fewer and fewer children will be met by mother with milk, cookies, and an open ear at the end of the school day. The babysitter or day care provider may substitute and you'll need to provide the open ear even if your own day has been long. Our community urgently needs after school programs, Hlatch key" children are lonely-T.V. does not help interpersonal relationships-and parents rightly worry about their safety. If your child is one of these, you might leave them some milk and fruit for an afterschool reminder that you'll be home soon. • • ·IIJnONS 'N BOWS • I _\r!, . L/ PRESCHOOL AND KINDERGARTEN ~~~~"i.:Z Ages 3-5 • "DUSO~' --developing understanding of self and others • "DISTAR"· - phonics reading program • "CHISANBOP'·' - finger math cEllculations • Arts & crafts & cooking • Music. dance and piano lessons • Conversational Spanish tow pupil/teacher ratio Degreed Faculty Mary Lou 972-8299 Fran Lapin 943-7832 278-8223 2600 East 3900 South \~. 1!,~ ~ Entrance into junior high and high school brings with it different challenges for parents, adolescents, and teachers. The push for achievement coming from the parent frequently clashes with the growing pains of the pre-adolescent and adolescent. Social relationships seem to become more important than algebra, a Friday night date more important than the social science ,~, quiz. There is no one recipe, but again knowing what's going on as early in the year as possible is essential. Being ahead of the game is important, otherwise the task is so overwhelming that your teenager will quit, rather than dig in. If problems occur, consult with your school counselor, psychologist, or social worker after you have visited with the teacher . Thc:y are all overworked, but willing to help. But you must take the initiative. Many children blossom in school. They get challenged, stimulated and race forward on the never ending journey of learning. Like on any trip, some days will be tiring and maybe even boring, but if we can instill the attitude in our children that we also learn something new every day, the legacy has been a good one and will withstand the usual vicissitudes. Dr. Agnes M. Plenk is a child psychologist who founded and is the executive director of the Children's Center, an organization which serves children who have behavior problems. Doctors When You Need Them, Continued from page l Regardless of who pays, the quality of emergency room care is also an issue. "There is great variance in the quality of pediatric care offered by an emergency room," says Pollary. ttlt's often quite good, but sometimes it's not consistent with the excellence or knowledge a pediatrician can offer." According to Pollary, Nightime Pediatrics does offer that specialized care, and for much less. Besides overutilization and the emergency room issue, Jenkins also believes that Pollary's service will not at all improve the pediatrician's lifestyle. Rather, he feels just the opposite will happen. uGiven the current competitive climate, we'll all have to start offering what Rod does and then everyone's lifestyle is going to be worse." In fact, other pediatricians have begun to offer nightime hours. Drs. Richard Farnsworth, Chuck Norlin, Susan Spoerke and Craig Brasher of Bonneville Pediatrics in West Valley have been open Mondays through Thursdays from 6 to 9 p.m. and Saturday mornings since June of this year. According to Farnsworth, Nightime Pediatrics, in Murray, is too far away for most patients and they like the concept of "this is your doctor" anyway. And, says Farnsworth, uWe're still working hard. We need the work." uoreat!" says Pollary. ttif a sick child can get some benefit from a little competition, then let him have it." ttBut it doesn't have to happen that way," he continues. uI'm proposing a cooperative effort. I'm not trying to steal patients. Other pediatricians just don't understand what I'm trying to do." ~ :( ~o< (l\~\J• ':,0 ,;t°<' ~ ~'i-•''b\°<' 1 955 t:ast 9tht~outh '.Y55~8650 Because other pediatricians have not referred patients to the extent he would like, Pollary is publicizing Nightime Pediatrics and that bothers some of his peers. "But I'm sympathetic," says Terashima. ult's not the same as if he were starting a practice." u1•m a horse of a different color," says Poliary. "I have to get the word out. A normal practice needs about 2,000 families to be successful and I need something like 20,000." Terashima goes on to say, uBasically Rod is competing with emergency rooms and drop-in medical centers. And I feel much more comfortable sending my patients to Nightime Pediatrics than to either of those ... I hope he can make a go of it.'' Doctors are slow to change but Pollary is optimistic that he will eventually win the trust of the medical community. He even predicts that two night-time clinics will one day be necessary in the Salt Lake area. "The concept i~ new and untried here but it can potentially give the best pediatric care for the community and do it for a· reasonable cost." One thing is certain, parents and children will have more choices because of his work. Not since the days of the doctor's house calls have medical services been so immediately available. Patty Kimball is the volunteer co,editor of Family Connections. • FAMILY CONNECTIONS, AUGUST 1983 aware that today's teen is also following a national pattern: they are dining out. After all, they are making more money than many of us did as working teens. As one working teen told me: "Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you might be an adult." While many of us as teens went to eat at drive,ins, to stay close to the things we really loved-french fries, rock and roll, and our cars-today's teenager knows that there are ways to impress members of the opposite sex. It might mean taking your favorite girl to La Caille, though one girl I talked to said she really didn't enjoy going there because all her date did was stare at the plunging neckline of their waitress. Or it might mean fixing "Mr. Right" a sauce bernaise as part of a prom night candlelight supper. And while their tastes still lean more toward Square Pegs and away from Julia Child, today's teens are becoming more and more sophisticated about the food they eat. Yet they are still teenagers ("half, humans," a psychologist friend reminds), so their tastes and behaviors are not quite adult. And when they do enter restaurants as consumers, their behavior usually reflects their quasi,adult insecurities. This is often· represented by their much heralded reliance on peers. . I remember advising some students on places to go before the junior prom and asked how many would be going. After listing a litany of the "inies" of the school, the total came to 20. They eventually ended up with forty. On Monday they complained that they were late to the dance because it took them so long to get served. One vowed the next time they would only by Al Church go with 12. Today's teenager is an important fixture I also vividly recalled a leisurely May in virtually every eatery in Utah-from fast drive to the Heather, unaware that it was food to haute cuisine. The franchise outlets graduation time for many l~cal seniors. The are the most obvious place. There, the overwhelming aroma of corsages and aw ward count r help or sweaty fry cooks- clearasil sent us out the door straight to wearing uniforms which in everyday teen Hires. life would be burned rather than wornOf course, not all weekend dates are play their prescribed roles in dishing up the fancy dress occasions. My informal polling one out of every three meals Americans eat in preparation for this article resulted in a out every day. few surprises. Not only do teenagers like to There are also many less visible teens travel with their peers, but they eat out to hidden from the public view and spared the have fun. The food is secondary. indignity of dressing like cub scouts. They Consequently, hamburgers and pizza wash dishes, tear lettuce or broil red prevailed. Some of the students snapper. In general, they do a good job, recommended the Training Table. Not only considering that they are overworked and are the burgers good but, as' you might underpaid, and that they put in hours and expect, students like the telephones. Ruth's assume responsibilities that more and the 7th Street Deli score high marks professional and older help are either not for food and atmosphere, Geppetto's and willing or not available to do. The Pie for music, and the Spaghetti But many of us critical adults ( who Factory. As one teen said, "Everybody occasionally peel< into kitchens to see likes spaghetti." which purple,haired punk burned our filet And when they do venture beyond pizza or neglected to wash our spinach) are not and burgers, few go beyond the predictable. Clearasil · and. Corsages: When Teens Dine Out n~~~:~ • Downtown • Hospitals HOLY CROSS Al Church has been reviewing restaurants in Utah and teaching high school for almost ten years. He is a frequent contributor to Utah Holiday and Network. in the Grand Canyon SALT LAKE INC. PROFESSIONAL CHILD CARE SINCE 1954 •U of U underneath a turned over glass of water, still full. Questions about specials, entrees, prices, separate checks, etc. are more important and appropriate than "Do you serve crabs?" (Answer: We serve anybody.) With smart alee barbs, you are more likely to have a crabby waiter or waitress. Table manners. In this day and age of free and breezy manners, it is hard, even for some adults, to think of the special rituals associated with restaurant dining. A few reminders might be useful: -Be considerate of the other diners with you and at the other tables. Loud, noisy behavior often leads to teens being segregated from other customers-far from the kitchen. The results are cold food and bad service. -Don't let strict table manners interfere with your enjoyment of the food. I reme~ber being at several high school dinners on the East coast and watching all my classmates leave the best part of the meal on their plates because they couldn't pry it off the bone or out of the shell. If you're going to be finicky, don't order on those terms; or, if stuck, ask the waiter or waitress. If neither of those things works, try to be discreet. If you are not sure which fork to use, use the one that works best. -If you can't eat it and it's worth taking home, ask for a doggy bag. I always ended up in the company of girls who must have been told that it wasn't polite to eat everything on their plate; or that it was important to impress the boy with their daintiness. I forgot about the starving hoards in China and thought, "Hey, I spent $20 on that squab, sweetheart. The least you could do is eat it!" So doggy bags became a stock and trade of my teen gourmet travels. That way, I usually had a cdnsolation prize for the goodnight kiss that didn't materialize. Order the unusual: After consulting with the waiter or waitress, try something out of the ordinary. It is fun, it might impress your date, and it's something to talk about. What can you lose? Experience Autumn Ms. Jean Sunderland (Dlrectress) Diploma of National Society of Children's Nurseries, London,.Englan" CLOSE TO: When I asked a few experienced seniors about "exotic" things they might order, they mentioned veal, crab and sauteed mushrooms. Anchovies, escargot, oysters, frog legs and prairie oysters all earned a big, collective "yuk." A junior boy said that it is "better to play it safe than get bad ( i.e. weird) food." For the special nights, not all teens go for the expensive places-like the Roof or La Caille-to impress their friends. The Cinegrill, La Parisian, the Rio Grande Cafe, Paprika, Five Alls, Litza's, Market Street Grill, Caldera, The Afterwords, Godfather, Finn's, Log Haven, and Pardner's were frequently listed. Only a few ethnic places made the grade, again reflecting the better, safer,than,sorry approach. But the Pearl, HO HO, the Mandarin, the Mikado, and Nikko's got positive notices. While a few admitted following recommendations of their parents, one boy was especially adamant. t!I don't like the country clubthere are just too many old people." But when our discussions went beyond favorite places, ((yuks," and the cleavages at La Caille, all of the teenagers I spoke to admitted not being treated as well as they would like. It was interesting, too, that the majority honestly felt the poor treatment was deserved. And they eagerly swapped their war stories about practical jokes, and techniqu~s to harrass waiters and waitresses. While they did laugh, they realized that the pranks get old. That pat of butter flipped on the ceiling isn't quite as funny the second time around, nor is that loosely screwed,on salt,shaker top. Since we all know your teens won't listen to you, I've written the rest of this article for them. Perhaps if you leave it around where they're not supposed to see it, they'll read it. Here are some suggestions that might improve their dining,out pleasure: Keep it small. After a group gets larger than eight, it is hard to get good food and personal service. And no matter what kind of service you do get, you end up with an automatic 15 percent gratutity added on your bill. Reservations. Whether it is the two of you, or the top forty, call ahead and let the restaurant know how many of you will be there. You'd be surprised that some restaurants that don't usually take reservations might accomodate larger groups with advance notice. Respect the waiters and waitresses. While teens seem to prefer the breezy help who can banter with the class wit or clam up the class clown, few waiters and waitresses feel it is worth their time. Too often, the tips for good service don't materialize. Or if they do appear, th'.ey often appear SUMMER DAY CAMP SWIMMING CREATIVE DANCE FRENCH GROUP PIANO October 24 - 29 Call 581-6927 UTAH MUSEUM OF NATURAL HISTORY NURSERY 2 & 3 YRS. PRE-SCHOOL 4 & 5 YRS. SCHOOl , AGE . L.D.S. PRIMARY CMILDRENS SHRINERS UNIV. MED. CENTER VETERAN$ 359-8617 925 First Avenue Salt Lake City. Ut~h 84103 DIRECTOR· ANNE TAYLOR AGES 2-10