Oral history interview of Stacie Goodrich, conducted by Kalli Huntsman (transcript)

Stacie Goodrich discusses issues with social distancing and school for her children, as well as issues with the COVID-19 pandemic and her career as a registered nurse working in an urgent care facility.

ORAL HISTORY WITH STACIE GOODRICH NOVEMBER 12, 2020 PARENTS OF CHILDREN WITH SPECIAL NEEDS DURING COVID-19 GOODRICH, STACIE b. 1980 Stacie Goodrich is the mother of a child with special needs. Her daughter, Courtney, attends Skyline High School and has been diagnosed with Autism and Sotos Syndrome. Stacie shares her concerns with COVID and the risks of contracting COVID, but she is more concerned about her child’s mental health when they have to practice distance learning. Stacie is always an RN and works in an urgent care center testing and caring for COVID patients, adding a different insight of a parent of children with special needs. She also shares the difficulty of alienation and people avoiding her because she is a nurse and worry they will get COVID from her. She also shares her concerns for her other children during this difficult time. Key Words: Parents of children with special needs, Autism, Sotos Syndrome, COVID, Therapy, healthcare worker, frontline, RN KH [00:00:01] OK. We're recording. OK. So, this is Kalli Huntsman, and I am doing a oral history interview on COVID 19, and with parents of children who have special needs, and I am going to go ahead and ask Stacie Goodrich to go ahead and introduce herself and give a little bit of information. SG [00:00:20] My name is Stacie Goodrich. Me and my husband Dustin grew up here in Salt Lake City. We have lived all over the country. We just moved back to Salt Lake a couple years ago. We have four kids from 17 to eight. We both work in health care and here in Salt Lake City our 15 year old daughter has something called Sotos syndrome and also was diagnosed with autism as well. KH [00:00:50] Where are the other places that you lived? SG [00:00:53] We lived in Ohio, Texas, and Nevada. KH [00:00:57] Where in each of those places? I’m just curious. SG [00:00:59] We were in Columbus for a couple years while Dustin went to Ohio State for school. Then we moved to we moved to Dallas Texas for like two and a half years and Courtney was born in Dallas. And Moved to Las Vegas after that to kind of be closer to home. There for nine years. We moved back in 2017. KH [00:01:23] OK so so just three years? Glad to be back? Different to be back? What do you think? SG [00:01:29] First I really hated it but I we're used to it now. It's grown. KH [00:01:35] I know its nice to have some family around too. So Courtney is your 15 year old that has autism and the Sotos syndrome. Can you tell me a little bit about Sotos syndrome? I don't think that is as familiar with people. SG [00:01:47] 1 No, Sotos syndrome is of course rare one of those rare genetic disorders. We actually found out when she was twelve months old that she had it which is actually young to get diagnosed with Sotos syndrome but she had a really big head. It used to be known as cerebral gigantism Sotos syndrome did, so her head was always off the charts on the growth scale. And she had some developmental delays walking, sitting crawling, all of that wasn't interested she was very hypo tonic when she was a baby. And I had the most amazing pediatrician that just, it wasn't even on my radar because I know all kids develop at different ages. But my pediatrician said you know oh and she also had some urinary tract problems as a baby. And so the year of the pediatrician put all these things together and said I can't come up with anything that puts all these together but I want you to go see a geneticist. And I was like oh OK I was pretty young you know I was a young mom, I was twenty five when I had her. And so when she was almost 1 we went to the geneticist and I sat her down and she looked at her head and her hands and her feet, kind of took a little history ever, walked out of the room and walked back in with a big book put it on the table and was like This is what she has. I was like Oh, she has something. OK. And so obviously I read up a lot on Sotos syndrome. There's not a whole lot out there, I found a very small network of people whose children have it. It's not like Down syndrome who you can find so much you know others many other families and so much to read you know what is it, reports and like literature OK written medical literature. Yes. But, so as Sotos syndromes they grow really fast. They're big for their age. So she's always despite being two and a half years younger than her older brother, she's always been the same size as him when they were little. And even now at 15 she's taller than him and so she's always been big. They have learning disabilities. She's in special ed actually at Skyline. So she’s home learning right now, but she's always been in a closed classroom, special ed classroom which has been good for her she's had for the most part really great teachers. And you know she can do things that I'm so grateful that she can she can read and write and walk and talk and do things but she's she's definitely not age appropriate age level. She is more like a six to eight year old right now and she's 15, so developmentally she's behind still. And the older she gets I feel like the farther that gets you know, the farther the age and developmental age separate which is kind of hard but. Yes, and when she was little I learned that it had autistic like behaviors Sotos syndrome. So the older she got some of those behaviors came out and I didn't think much about it just thought oh it's part of her Sotos syndrome. But then she started doing a lot more, having a lot more autistic tendencies like jumping and flapping her hands and really liking to stick to a schedule. And so after talking with her pediatrician we talked to a developmental pediatrician. I think that's what it was somebody up at the University of Utah just last year and she was diagnosed with autism. He's like Oh definitely. And I felt really bad because I waited like 14 years to get that diagnosis. But he said No no it's fine don't feel bad. People you know wait and especially since it was written that it was part of it I didn't anyways. But it's nice to have that because she goes to ABA therapy now five days a week over in Cottonwood Heights by whole foods right there. And that's been really good for her. She loves her therapist there and they work on a lot of life skills with her and communication because she's not great at communicating and stuff like that. So that’s Sotos syndrome. KH [00:06:04] I had no idea. So thank you. OK, so you mentioned that you and your husband both work in the medical field. So can you tell me what do you do and what does your husband do? SG [00:06:12] 2 Yes. Dustin My husband is a perfusion perfusionist, which means he, it’s weird job, there's not very many of them. He runs the heart lung machine bypass machine during open heart surgery and he works at Primary Children’s, he's always done pediatric heart surgery in Vegas and then here. So that's what he does at Primary Children's is on the heart team. And then I am a nurse. I've been a nurse for 17 years almost 18. And right now I work in an insta care at Cottonwood Instacare on care on the same campus as TOSH, and it's crazy because we have a COVID testing clinic there. And so it's just right in our parking lot outside. And sometimes I work there but mostly work in the insta care where we also get lots of COVID patients that walk in. KH [00:07:07] Does Courtney have any immunocompromised anything? Does it affect her if she gets ill? ls it worse for her? Is she pretty on par with the other kids? SG [00:07:15] Generally, she's pretty healthy. She does have, nothing like immunocompromised. She has had a lot of surgeries and procedures. Her stuff in her but she's she's not really immunocompromised that way where when she gets sick it's really worse. She doesn't have asthma or anything like that but like physiologically she's had a lot of, well I mean I think she's had 11 procedures or surgery, so I am extra careful with her. KH [00:07:50] I want to ask a little bit about COVID. We're going to delve into that and how it's impacted you and Courtney if that's OK if we can go in there. I vote yes this first because I think it is interesting. I have this aha moment. You know like the 911 you can always say I was here sitting here when I heard about that. Do you remember like when you realized and maybe it'll be different because you're in the medical industry and your husband's but when you realize oh crap this is this is legit. This is you know I just been talking the news anymore that it became like it hit home and that it was real and a little frightening or not maybe or how you felt about it was a panicky. Can you tell me about that. SG [00:08:24] Yes actually I mean I'd heard about it and I thought just big hype, the news is hyping this up. It's not a big deal. It's in other countries it's not going to come here and then an old boss of mine a doctor I used to work with in Dallas put something on Facebook just like it's going to happen. It's coming to our country. Just make sure you go to the right sources when you're looking for information about it like even this was in February that he posted it posted because I was like This is good information. People need to know where to go for for information when and if it happens and then literally about two weeks later it was the one day at work and that was when it was very beginning. I don't even know what day it was. It was early March. The phones were ringing off the hook. People were coming in. Afraid they had it. I remember there was this she, came in with her kid who was like 8, which obviously we know it doesn't affect kids very much but she was scared out of her mind. He's 8. He's got a cough. I think he has the virus. And that was back in the day of, well have you travelled around Asia, or been around anyone from China. That's the only way we get it right now. And, it was the craziest day at work I had to stay like two hours over my shift. I had to come in the next day even though I wasn't scheduled because the phones were off the hook and everybody was coming in and we had no protocols in place as 3 to what to do with these patients. You know what we need to test for what we need to look for. We didn't know if it was respitory, or droplet or what kind of things we were looking for. And that was in early March and I knew it was real back in early March because I knew I shortly after that we had a couple pay. I mean we had a patient coming in with his oxygen in the 60s and he walked into our clinic like oh my word, how are you even standing? You look terrible. And once I saw that I'm like OK this thing's real I can see what it does to people even though I don't work in ICU. Some people wait too long to even seek medical care. So that’s the moment when I was like OK. And it's like, here we are eight or nine months later and, I hate it. You know, I'm over it. I hate wearing my mask. I hate talking to patients about it. I hate asking questions about it. But, it’s kind of the new normal. KH [00:10:39] Do you worry at all about bringing home. Do you I mean do you have to change your procedures of coming home and what you do? SG [00:10:45] So at first I totally did. I have always left my shoes in the garage ever since I've been a nurse because that's just gross. But I would take off my scrubs in the garage. I would come straight into the shower. I wouldn't touch any of my kids. I would shower, change my clothes, all of that probably for like the first three months. I don't come home and shower but I come home. I don't touch anybody. I still leave my shoes in the garage but I come home and I put my clothes in the dirty clothes right away and I change right away. And obviously, you know when I leave work I wash my hands, wash my phone, I wash my badge, put it all away and then wash my and wash my hands and stuff again. But I was really worried at first about bringing it home. Like here I am like. Are you going to give it to me. Am I going to give it to them like this, am I being mean. I know some doctors that slept downstairs for a long time at their homes and still do. I have one doctor that still brings a dirty clothes hamper to work and changes before he even leaves. So. I'm not as bad anymore but I do come home and change right away. KH [00:11:48] Interesting. Have you had to change other things within your home like dynamics? You know I know I first started like I was wiping everything down before it came in, Like, you know, from the grocery store. SG [00:11:58] Well the big thing is the school stuff and everybody being home. I don't necessarily wash everything down. I still make my kids wash their hands when they come home from school and that type of thing but I don't wipe stuff down more than I usually do. I probably should but I don't. But the biggest changes, you know having the kids home. KH [00:12:21] Because school is at home? Well we opened and I know this because our children go to the same school but that's that's all, but when you had the choice of distance learning or in-person you chose in-person for all your children. SG [00:12:34] 4 That was in person. I went up to Skyline and I talked to the special ed teacher before school started because we both work and because she does have special needs. There's really not a great option for her to to learn at home because neither of us are, I mean there is not a guarantee that one of us will be home every day for her. And the fact that everything is harder for her and she's way comfortable at school and she has a routine at school I knew it would be hard for her to have at home learning which we're finding out right now. So I went talk to the teacher I asked how many kids were going to be in class and how many kids did choose online learning and several kids did choose online learning in her class which I guess kind of surprised me. But I'm assuming they have a stay at home parent that's able to help them navigate through the online stuff. But right now there's only five kids in her classroom and she is in there, you know they do A and B days and so on her, both days she's in there for three periods and goes out for one class one day she goes out for a freshmen success class and another day she goes out for seminary. But I feel OK about sending her to school. A Because, she's going to learn more there and B because really there's only five kids in her class. And so it's not like forty five students in there and everybody's packed in. KH [00:13:57] So and I know that currently we are, our the schools on a two week shutdown restart and I want to call it. How is she doing? How is she doing with that and how are you doing that? SG [00:14:09] It's harder it’s harder. She She's a creature of habit and so it's been hard for her to be home and when she's home she loves to look at her devices and she looks at the iPad and she looks at her iPhone and she loves to watch the same handful of videos over and over again. And so for me I’m like, OK I've got to find something to keep her busy. So even if it's just putting on a movie for her. Oh hold on sorry. OK. Are you there? Ok. I try and keep her entertained. Dustin was home with her the last couple of days and they'll sit down, and her teacher does either like zooms or records them so she can watch class. So we're just going to go on a little bit later the day after she watches “Wonder”.” That's one of her favorite movies. She watches it all the time. And when she's done with that we'll go online and watch resume videos and get her caught up. But it's harder it's harder because I don't have as much patience, I feel as her teacher probably does with her. And so. KH [00:15:20] Does anybody. I I so appreciate teachers. SG [00:15:23] Oh my goodness gracious they're wonderful so wonderful. Though it's been harder having this online and I certainly hope it doesn't last very long, skyline please. KH [00:15:37] Are you seeing her not, I mean obviously there's some difference but is it and it's only been a week now. Right. Are you seeing a difference in her development because of it? Has it impacted at all or do you think. Because it's just a short term it's not that big of a problem. SG [00:15:52] 5 I think because it's short term and she's still able to go to her ABA therapy every day and so that is some kind of consistency for her to be there with that because she goes three hours every day to that she's been ok so far. But, I don't know it's hard to have her home for her sake and my sake because I feel like yes it is affecting her because she's not having that interaction with her teachers and the other kids at the school and she loves school since she's gone to Skyline, she absolutely loves it. It is crazy how much she loves going to school. She has no friends but she loves school. It's interesting. It's. It's. It's really interesting she used to not get up for school for junior high. It was a she was a beast to get out of bed. Now she sets her alarm she gets herself up she gets herself dressed and it's so that it's great to see that. And I hope it doesn't go away. You know since school's been put on pause. KH [00:16:55] You mentioned she goes to therapy three hours a day. Five days a week. Now did that curtail it all at any point when it first started? Did they slow it down? SG [00:17:06] You want to know I, so we got her diagnosis last year about this time in October I think of 2019 of autism which you have to have an official diagnosis to be able to go to ABA therapy or you just have to pay straight cash for it and it is expensive. And so I got the diagnosis and a doctor that I work with has a son with severe autism almost non-verbal. And I spoke with his wife and she was giving me all the information about what you need to do to get Courtney on disability and you should contact these people and there's this great parent advocate group. And so she was wonderful and she told me about this ABA center that their son goes to. It's called ABS and so I thought, I tried once and they're like oh it's a several month wait, you know but send us the paperwork and so I was like a little discouraged, but I didn't do this probably until February of last year, January February? I don't know it took me a minute to wrap my head around the autism diagnosis on top of everything else. But, I did it, and then so finally I turned the stuff in and I'm not kidding you a week later they're like we've had an opening come up. So it only took her a month to get in and I was a little nervous about starting. Because it was right in March of the whole thing when they accepted her. And they said you can come we're still it's considered essential therapy. And so I waited I think like, three weeks. I just kind of wanted to see how it played out. And then she started there and yes she they come to our house one day a week and then she goes there four days. KH [00:18:46] Can you tell me what ADA and ABS stand for? SG [00:18:49] A B.S. is the name of the it's called Alternative Behavior Strategies. It's just the name of the facility. ABA, I got to be honest I don't remember what it stands for. Something, I don't know it's I can look it up. I don't remember what it stands for. No. That's the name of the facility. A B.A. stands for something else something behavior. It has to do with autism. Yes, it's an autistic therapy that they've found really helps. Hold on one second. Zack and Courtney, you guys need to stop. OK let's go out. Quit kicking her, Zack. He doesn't discriminate, he still teases the heck out of her. 6 KH [00:19:37] Good for him. That’s what they're supposed to do, right? I'm glad to see that. SG [00:19:45] They all tease the heck out of her. Like she’s a regular old sister. KH [00:19:52] That's what she wants right. Let me see. One sec, i'm sorry I've just been so impressed with you I forgot to follow questions. Have your other kids, has that affected them? The whole COVID thing you have four children, correct? And is it affecting them at all? SG [00:20:18] Yeah. I'd say my youngest is in third grade right now and I feel like they just have kind of gone with it. They just go with it. They wear their masks. They don't really think twice about it. He was still able to play his little league football this year. I think it's I think he's kind of the one that's gone on with it the easiest because it's just like it is what it is. My oldest is a senior at Olympus. I'm pretty sure he knows Berrett. And, he has been it's really affected him more. I would say because he can't see his friends. It's his senior year. There's no dances. You can't go to sporting events, that they can play football, but the students can't go. I mean 50 can or whatever like. KH [00:21:07] I get to go because Barrett cheers and it's. Yeah. SG [00:21:10] Yes. My sister Lindy her daughter cheers up at Olympus so she could go to the games. But like you know that's the funnest part of high school is going to the football games and having all your friends there and homecoming and so that's I think it's been really hard on him and he's, and so I don't know, I was like well he's a boy maybe he doesn’t care. But he did say something a month or so ago, he’s like nice senior year I'm getting, you know and now the governors like you two weeks and you can't see any of your friends and I told him I was like you know, as long as you're not hanging out like a party with 30 people like it's fine if you see a friend you know if you want to go to a friend's house and say hi or go to Chick-fil-a or whatever with a friend. That's probably bad that I say that but I feel like so much has been taken from him. That if he wants to see a friend I'm OK with that. It’s more at school. KH [00:22:04] Yeah I feel like there they were teased, like yeah it’s only going to be a couple of weeks. We just want to flatten the curve and eight months later we're still. SG [00:22:10] Right, here we are. OK. Yes. And like it’s lucky like Berrett gets to cheer, but like how fun is it to cheer for parents. It's only, You know it's just different. And I know it's the new normal and I Promise it'll probably be over in a year and a half where, the kids will go back to regular high school life, but I don't think the rest of their senior year will have much of dances and stuff. I mean they did a little homecoming but it was, you know it's just different and I feel like it has 7 affected him the most. He has had more anxiety than usual and he has even seen a counselor for a little while. Just to help him deal with it because, he just was stressed and I think a lot of that has to do the fact that he's a senior and it's like oh my gosh what do I do now? Because I have to grow up and there's no. KH [00:23:05] Yeah. And I don't know how to navigate this way. SG [00:23:07] Yes. And there's this crazy virus going on around the world and I think it kind of all had something to do with it. I mean he's fine but it's just been harder from him than I think any of my other ones. KH [00:23:20] Does Courtney pick up on that do you think? SG [00:23:24] I think so. She is, as long as she has like me or Dustin around, she's usually ok. She, we’re her comfort. Especially me like when I leave the house, where are you going Mom? When are you coming home? What time are you going to be home? You know she knows when I go to work. When are you going to work? OK so I know you're going to be home about 6:45. If I’m not home by 650 I will get a phone call. Where are you Mom? Are you on your way home? OK. But as long as she knows where me and Dustin are she pretty, she feels comfortable with that. I think the COVID thing she thinks about it but like same with her since she's got that like six to eight year old mentality she just wears the mask and then goes to school. KH [00:24:09] She doesn’t seem frightened by it at all? How did you when you first kind of addressed it with her? How do you explain it so that she realizes it's serious but you don’t awnt to frighten her? SG [00:24:20] Yes. So it's I mean my kids obviously knew right when it first started. I was at work all the time and that wasn't normal because I wasn't working full time at that point, and I just started working full time in May of this year and that hit in March. But all of a sudden I was going to work all the time and I was you know being weird about Don't touch me when I come home and this and so. You know and we tried to turn off the news because that's just bad that all. So we just would do you know said it's this weird virus corona virus and they'd heard about corona virus and, you know just kind of said that we gotta stay clean and we have to stay, you know stay home you know from school last spring when we had to just stay home from school and just very basically we we explained it very basic. KH [00:25:08] And she was pretty good with it? She's been wearing a mask and all that? SG [00:25:12] 8 Yeah. She's really good about it. I mean sometimes we she forgets like when the bus picks her up out front and the bus driver will open the door and he will say get a mask Courtney, but we all forget. I'm the one the waves by to her. KH [00:25:24] I do too. I walk in a place and go Oh. SG [00:25:29] No I still it's not natural for me to grab a mask, so. KH [00:25:33] I'm curious you know especially with ou being in the medical field, you know talking about they have a vaccine they think that's doing pretty well. Did you think you will get that pretty quickly? Or do you think he'll wait for a bit? And for your family? What do you think? SG [00:25:44] I will get it as soon as they want to give it to me. I don't really have very many reservations about it at all. I mean if I turn green or start growing wings or I mean I don't really feel like the side effects are as much as what I'm worried about as like, is it really effective type thing. I'm not I am obviously a pro vaccer, like I am all about that and I feel like there's really really really smart people developing these. And, there's rules and like the FDA and these things put in place and I know they want to get it through quick. But I also know they're being careful about it. So I really don't have reservations. I was talking to a doctor yesterday. She's like I don't want to get it. What I don't know about this or that I'm like oh I don't care. Sign me up. Yeah, Intermountin said hopefully by the end of the year they'll have it for the most high risk groups which I'm assuming is like COVID unit nurses and doctors, ICU, and then E.R. and insta care will be after that. So I’ll get it. KH [00:26:46] You also mentioned like a few just little adaptations you've had to make. I'm guessing your husband's kind of having to do the same thing when he comes home. Any of that do you think you will keep in place? Like with everything that you've learned with COVID, and the changes you've made your family, not just the medical that but with family things, is there anything that you've learned from going Wow I. Like that. And you're going to try and keep in place? SG [00:27:09] I mean I don't I wouldn't say. Not really. There's nothing I like about it. I mean I will probably come home and always change my clothes. Sometimes I would stay in my scrubs after work, which I know is gross, but sometimes I would do it. But I will never do that again. I mean they come off right. I walked from the kitchen or from the garage to my bedroom throw in the dirty clothes in the bathroom and I will probably keep that up forever now. I used to just like I said used to just be my shoes I’d leave at the door but It's gross. I mean I I've always made my kids wash their hands and so I’ll keep doing that. KH [00:27:54] 9 Yeah. I want to get a little bit into your mental health. You know we talked, you talked about how the kids have dealt with it, but you also mentioned that your daughter as long as you're there she's OK or your husband or you're the, you're the anchor. So I'm kind of guessing that you're not getting much time and you're now working full time, sounds like from maybe all that's going on with how busy it is. How are you doing? SG [00:28:23] Well I honestly like. I mean not great, but not bad. Like I'm not like crying every day. But I am frustrated and I'm tired and I do come home and I feel like I don't really have any more to give to my family. Then by the time my kids go to sleep I don't have any more to give to my husband. And, I mean sometimes I just get really overwhelmed and I'll drive home from work and I'm just like, I hate this. You know I hate it. I do. But I mean what can you do. I don't really know. It's hard but, you just keep going. I guess it's I don't talk about it because I hate talking about it. But, yeah, it’s hard. The kids, you know it's just hard. Everybody's worried like is this going to kill me or do I hang out with my mom. Do I go see grandma. I don't know. But both my parents and in laws have been like nope, we want to see you, come over. And that's been super great for my kids because of how awful to not see Grandma. But, I have, It's funny you should ask that, I just last night sometimes I feel like, people don't want to be around me because of where I work. Like. Oh my gosh you probably have it and you're going to give it to me. So I put a thing on my Instagram last night. And just last night because I've been thinking about it so much. Do you, what did I ask. I just mostly to the point. Do you not want to be around health care workers who work with COVID patients because you're worried about yourself getting sick? And most everybody said no. There were a handful that said yeah, I do, I worried about being around you more than the regular person. Which I totally get like I get it. The media is not making anything easier. They, everything's like be afraid you're all going to die even though like ninety nine and a half percent of you that get it won't. But it is a little isolating sometimes at the very beginning I could tell. One of my son's friends came over I could tell one of them was really hesitant about being in my house and I was like Are you nervous? Do your parents not want you here? He's like Well, yeah. They told me I probably shouldn't come over here. And I'm like I'm sorry. I said I changed my clothes and I wash my hands and I'm doing my best. And he's like It's not me it's my parents but it feels sometimes like people don't or are more afraid, I guess, of me. And I don't know if that's just me and my brain getting in my brain and myself, but. KH [00:31:14] I'm glad to hear that the response was No. SG [00:31:16] Yeah I was too I was I was very shocked. It was like most people said no I'm fine being around you. Sorry, I didn't want to but sometimes. KH [00:31:27] No, I mean I you know, I always cry. No one can cry alone with me. So I guess my next question kind of leads into that and maybe you can figure one but I know when I hit my limit I just out of nowhere all said I was like. I can't do this like had a good breakdown kind of you know and hit the wall. Have you hit that. Do you think you're still going okay or do you think you and what did at it. 10 SG [00:31:51] I mean I, depends on the day I guess sometimes. Yeah. And I just get angry and I come home angry and I go to bed angry. But, other times you try and look for the good and think OK this isn't going to last forever and, you know being a member of the church that I'm a member of gives me hope. You know that, I know it's not going to last forever. And that's kind of a big part of it too is having a faith. That gives you hope. That it's gonna be all right. And this isn't going to last forever even though sometimes you just feel like you're in the trenches of it all just like. And you go into work and this is a new protocol. We're not doing that anymore. And this is what we have to do for that. And this is changing and this is how we're testing and now we're testing this way and it's like. Changing every single day and trying to keep up with it all. And then school you're out of school you're in school you have to go back. You have to stay home. You sat by the wrong person in class. You have to stay home and now you can go back. But you sat by the wrong person but you can still go back you're fine and there's all these rules and it's overwhelming and I don't really feel like I've hit the wall where I can't function anymore because so many people that rely on me. You know, Including myself I still feel like I need to take care of myself. I have had a lot of health issues this year though. Completely unrelated to COVID, which have also been somewhat overwhelming. I found out I have a brain tumor. And, yes, because I started having these weird humming in my ear in March, of course happened in March. No it was in May. I found I had a weird humming in my ear and it didn't go away. And then I got an MRI and there's this tumor in my brain that's benign. But if it grows they’re going to have to take it out. And then the medicine they gave me for my ear, started giving me heart problems because it's a diuretic and so it tanked my potassium which started giving me like arrhythmias. So. I've had to deal with all of this weird health stuff and I attribute it all to just growing old. I turned 40 this year and I feel like I just kind of tanked. So I've been dealing with all these health issues on top of everything else. So I'm just trying you know I just try and take it with the with in stride and I drink a coke every day and I know it's not good for me but it's like the best part of my day. And. KH [00:34:29] It’s your mother's milk. SG [00:34:32] Right? It is, so I have to do that. But yeah it's been a it's been an interesting year for me for sure. KH [00:34:40] Yeah so I had no idea about that. I'm sorry. SG [00:34:44] You know if you're going to get a brain tumor it was the right kind to get. KH [00:34:48] Yeah I guess so if you say so. Yeah. I don't even know what to say. SG [00:34:56] 11 Oh no I'm OK. I have to go get another MRI next month. And then if it grows then it'll kind of be a big deal and I'll have to get it taken out and because of where it is it’s not, it’s like right here behind my eye like behind my forehead. So he's like we'll have to make the incision from here to here and pull your forehead down and cut off a piece of your skull and then get to it right there. Great. Yeah, noninvasive. KH [00:35:25] You'll be fine you’ll be up and at it the next day. You mentioned the news and how, especially for because I think for you because you're in there and you see the news. Is it just make you angry? SG [00:35:37] Yeah. I do. It's always negative. It's always negative and there's so many success stories. Yes there are absolutely people who die, and I I totally get that and it is scary. The thing that's scary right now to me though is that the hospitals really are full like ICUs and the COVID floors they're full and it's not even that every single bed is full I actually just read yesterday on our daily briefs that we get e-mailed every day that the numbers are slightly misleading because the University of Utah and IMC are almost to capacity because in all those numbers they're counting ICU beds at Primary Children's in those numbers and there is no adults at Primary Children's even being taken care of. There's no one even in the ICU for COVID at Primary Children's and the other thing is the caregivers. They don't have, that’s what they're going to run out of first, Is nurses, respitory therapists, and doctors before they run out of beds to put people in. There's always gonna be a bed there. KH [00:36:43] What about the equipment do you feel like there? SG [00:36:46] I feel like there's plenty of ventilator. KH [00:36:48] I I guess I ask that because you know my, Madison Huntsman has written some articles about her concern, she has a child that has special needs. Have you felt that at all like if there's not enough beds or if there's not enough equipment is my child going to be not as, um…., SG [00:37:06] Important. Life as important, right. Yes. Well so I read gosh it actually made me really angry an article a couple of weeks ago that just said, you know Utah has this plan in place in case everything gets out of control and in this plan they're going to have to pick and choose who gets the ventilators. And A I was angry because I don't feel like we're there yet and there's no reason to cause that kind of alarm. And as a child I don't think a child would ever go without a ventilator regardless of if they had special needs or severe medical problems or anything because I know Primary Children's has open beds, has has staff. Because it's a children's hospital it's not hitting kids as much. So I don't really I'm not really concerned if Courtney had to get it and heaven forbid it affected her in a really horrible way to the point you know she is 15 so she is a little older than a little kid to where it could hurt her more. I feel like the care would be available to 12 her and the equipment would be available to us her because she's that pediatric patient population. Now if I had a 28 year old with Down syndrome, I think the concern might be a little more real, to me because they would be going to an adult hospital and if they did get to the point where it's like, we're over the top, we have to pick and choose now. I would worry. I would worry if my adult child would be not considered good enough or healthy enough. My special needs child, I would worry if they were older, which is sad to say. KH [00:38:47] But it's interesting. I'm also curious how much of do you think is political? Do you feel like any of what's going on is political? How much is or what do you think could be different because I think you have a really great inside perspective. SG [00:39:01] I mean OK so I would be considered more of a conservative type person. Always have been, it's just the way I'm raised. It's not that I am against a Democrat or anything like that. I'm pretty open minded if you ask me. But if I had to choose, I would say I'm more conservative than liberal. Most of the doctors that I work with are liberal. And I feel like the media made this about politics. Why we're asking our president for advice on a medical issue is beyond me. You know, we need to stick with medical advisors and doctors and scientists and people who actually know what's going on instead of asking the president to tell me what's going on because he doesn't know even even his advisers don't know their political advisers. Yes his his medical advisors I am absolutely all about listening to anybody medical even if you are, like an attorney general or you are not an attorney. The doctor who's the doctor. Oh. Yeah. The main doctor. Country Doctor whoever they are. I would listen to that person. A political doctor I would listen to you with a grain of salt because I know they came out and had a bunch of doctors stand up on the state capitol stairs of the country capitol stairs and say, this medicine works and this one doesn't. But I also know that some of that was money driven because they paid them to say these things. I'm more like fact driven you show me the actual studies by actual scientists and doctors and that's what I'm putting my stock in. I'm putting my stock in Doctors and what they have to say and scientists and these people developing the vaccines. I don't want to listen to a politician. I get really angry, you know I got really mad when they did those Amber Alerts over our phone. Saying, I felt like I was a horrible use of that because that is also fear based. And all you're doing, KH [00:40:54] Explain that for those who don't know if you want to go ahead and tell. SG [00:40:57] Yes, so our cell phone system in all around the country has an Amber Alert system or an emergency system for natural disasters like the earthquake we had this year, or for a little child that gets kidnapped and they will send an alert to my phone saying keep your eye out for this, or this just happen, and I've always taken those seriously because they're honking at you with the noises. And a couple of weeks ago the day we had the highest setting record was what 2200 some cases and now we've way blown through that. But, there's an alert comes on our phone and says wear your mask. The cases that are an all time high. This is you know we need to be concerned and this is concerning for our numbers and, I was so mad, I was like that is not what 13 you use as an emergency case where if people want to know the case counts they can look most people do. The news announces that every day you don't need to do that. And Dustin was in the operating room when that came out and all the doctors and everybody's phone starts going off and they look at him and even the doctors were like ok, no this is not what this is for. Do not tell me how many cases came over on an emergency alert system. And then they did it again on Sunday when the governor had an announcement. But it's like, you know that I I feel that's overreach. That's just me though. KH [00:42:17] What do you think about how now they've shut down. For you know just, our governor came out on Sunday and they’re now saying all they have all these different things you can do you can't do and you cannot have anyone in your home except for immediate family members. And not more than it’s a group of 10 or more. How do you feel about that coming, into your home? SG [00:42:40] I mean I can see his point because I know, and I also know that the major driving force behind this is 15 to 24 year olds who spread this virus more often than anyone else. But I also think they're not going to listen to it. College students are not going to listen to this high school student aren’t going to listen. I don't think it's a bad idea. I mean if you honestly just give us two weeks. Like if you do and only hold us to this for two weeks, OK I can make the sacrifice. You know I'm not going to say I'm not going to go to my mom's though I mean I probably will. But, I just want to make me nervous because two weeks is that going to turn into two months. Is that going to turn into till next year. You know what's going to turn into. KH [00:43:23] Kind of how it happened with the three week quarantine? SG [00:43:26] I mean I'm happy to do it. I'm happy to keep my kids home and whatever but. KH [00:43:30] How are you staying connected to friends? SG [00:43:33] Text. You know we used to go to lunch with friends all the time and go out to dinner on the weekends and then we just don't anymore. I mean we'll go to dinner. I've maybe like a month ago I went with my brother and his wife to dinner. I'm not I mean, text messages we will send funny memes to each other, that’s about it. KH [00:43:55] Normally I ask like have you with all the time you've had now that you're at home had the chance to develop some new hobbies or, but you're not. You've gone full time with work. Is it because of COVID that you gone full time because there's such a need for you? SG [00:44:10] 14 That was kind of part of it. It was kind of an easy easy in. The hours were there and, I know it's weird and it's super, and I honestly I don't even. Sorry I am saying this out loud, but like as a nurse, like I kind of feel called to it. Is that weird? KH [00:44:27] No it's not weird at all. SG [00:44:29] I feel like I'm I'm there and I can do the job so I might as well help. And if you look at the patients we deal with, I don't, they're mean they don't I don't think I help helping them but I feel like I can do it, and so I'm gonna do it. I don't know if I’m full time forever, but I'm ok with it right now. KH [00:44:48] Well thank you I appreciate it. Do you think you'll like, way scale back like are you burned out? SG [00:44:57] I don't know I'll probably wait till next summer and see how it goes. Zack's supposed to go on his church mission next summer and so maybe when that starts to ramp up and he needs to get ready I'll maybe scale back a little. KH [00:45:10] Is there anything that I haven't asked you or we haven't spoken about but you think would be a really good point to make like you know as we as we talk ahead of time and we plan for this and you know it's going to the back of your brain. Have I forgotten anything or is there anything key because I think I always forget stuff and I know that. So is there anything that? SG [00:45:27] No I think you asked really great questions and I think that question or that article that your daughter in law wrote was something I never really thought about but I think it was actually really good for me to think about it because you do wonder. Am I ever going to get to that point where my daughter's not going to be considered Important enough to save. And I hope you don't get there and I don't think we will. But I hadn't even thought about that. So I think you know I think it's really a good question. And I am glad you asked it. But I don't I can't think of anything else. No. I appreciate you asking me these questions. It's been good. KH [00:46:07] Oh good, I made you cry. It was really good. SG [00:46:10] Sorry. KH [00:46:11] No no I'm sorry. SG [00:46:15] 15 People don't really when they ask how you are doing, most of them don't really want an actual answer. KH [00:46:19] It's true. And I really did. I do. I'm sure your mom wants to know too. And she's means she's also the medical, but is she retired now? SG [00:46:29] She's retired but she is actually now a mission nurse for our church. So she's a nurse overall the missionaries in South Salt Lake mission. And so that has kept her so busy and luckily she has me who works at the testing site that can help her get orders put in for all of her Missionaries. KH [00:46:51] Yeah. Good job. Thank you. SG [00:46:52] So it's good for her because sometimes it's a real pain in the butt to get on that COVID line and call in. KH [00:46:57] It is. I bet. OK. This is the last thing I can think of, and maybe for your kids as well. Have you reduced like your little, pod for lack of a better word, of friends. Like you we looked and realized, I'm really OK wihtout that or you know what I mean? As we’ve had to kind of hunker down and be more limited. Have you chnged that dynamic socially? SG [00:47:20] I feel like my kids since we've moved to Utah have been mostly around family. I mean as they've gotten older like the high school my you know the older kids are hanging out with more friends but like as for me and Dustin like yeah, we don't do as much like we're OK just, like and like since we're both working full time like the time we're home we use it as time at home together you know and Sundays are actually my favorite day of the week because my kids aren't going anywhere. I get to be at home with them because I don't ever work on Sundays. And, yeah. We're OK with just us. It's been nice. I mean I think all along you know I'll I want to go back out and go on vacations again and do all the fun things. But, right now I'm OK. KH [00:48:05] How much longer do you think this is going to last. SG [00:48:10] Probably. I mean my guess I don't know. I was reading some stuff yesterday and they said the vaccine will be probably more readily available to the public next summer. And so I'm hoping by next fall. I mean you have to get that herd immunity even if it's through a vaccine. And I was reading it on the daily briefing that they’re finding that the immunity you build by getting COVID is only lasting three to nine months. Which I did not know that. And so they were saying in the nine month period we're going to try and vaccinate. As many people as possible to finally gain that herd immunity so things can hopefully go back to normal. And yeah like maybe the end 16 of this year for health care workers and then high risk groups in the winter or early winter next year and then by spring and summer hopefully, hopefully more. Just general population can get that. I don't know how many of them are going to have faith in vaccine with the way things are right now and I think a lot of people might be scared to get it. So I don't know if it's going to work either itself because people are weary of it. KH [00:49:19] That’s a good point though. Well hang in there. Thank you for being a health care worker on the front line that you know we talk about it but I don't think people really always hit home if you really don't have a connection to it. So thank you. So thanks thanks for your time. I’m going to turn off the recording. 17